Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 of 2017 - the "finals were better last year" Edition

[ClayB]

Not sure about all the Mayne to #1 talk- if I talk some bonehead into giving me millions for what I can provide (and what I can provide has been on public display for ~ a decade), then you'd think you'd be in the TOP 50 on that performance.

To #1 IMO

 

[Funk]

Number 1 has to be Tex Wa*ker

 

[yyou]

Pick 36 - Billy Hartung

He has less hurt-factor than a well-lubed Nick dal Santo hooking up with a pr0n star. Like said pr0n-star, opposition coaches will just say "let Billy take it" because you'll get the ball back on a turnover anyway, or at least get the chance to set up your defence when he runs 100m, stops, props, hesitates then chips the ball 20m sideways.

The less hurt factor comment made me laugh out loud.
Bloody hilarious & loving this thread.
(I usually avoid the bay, but i’m addicted to this thread.
Cheers Mofra

 

[Hap Hapablap]

will be utterly disappointed if there is no priddis.

absolutely awful this year but too many dick riders protecting him

 

[Schulzenfest]

will be utterly disappointed if there is no priddis.

absolutely awful this year but too many dick riders protecting him

If your mob didn’t have Priddis in the Elimination Final then they wouldn’t have been playing in a semi final the week after.

 

[Mofra]

Player 28 - Billie Smedts


Pictured: Billie's attempts to "smell what the Blues are cooking" backfires spectacularly

Another year, another Billie Smedts inclusion in the Bottom 50. He gets a few bonus points for spending a career thus far getting fans accustomed to underperformance, and then failing to meet those expectations. This time he managed to do so at a club that have been so poor this century they're rebuilding on a rebuild of a rebuild, the Melbourne Eye of the AFL.

Smedts was traded to Carlton from Geelong in a deal that included a future first from Geelong, a second round pick from Carlton and Zach Touhy which is both a handy footballer and the sound of a 75 year old man expelling phlegm. Canny trading like this has kept Geelong almost in contention for many years now, while trades like this show that the annual "pick up GWS rejects" strategy of SOS during trade week is not the worst thing Carlton can do.

Anyway, Smedts didn't do anything stupid off field this year (like take selfies while driving a Maloo ute circa Smedts 2013) so that's kind of a win. Unfortunately he was traded to play football, revealing the unfortunate flaw in Carlton's trade strategy.

Managing 9 games this year, Billie didn't exactly add to the aroma of Carlton's cooking in 2017. Managing the first two games this year, then getting dropped, then playing two games, getting dropped, playing one game, getting dropped, then finishing the year with four games so poor that pity must be the only reason for his selection - in two of those games he managed 5 touches each with an average of 1.5 kicks. The first of those 5 possession games was against Essendon, which included 3 clangers. Most Carlton fans would have enjoyed a Clayton Oliver death threat more than a review tape of Billie Smedts' performance.


"Gingers have souls!" - Clayton Oliver

It's worth pointing out that he was a first round draft pick in 2010, a year that included Dahlhaus and Johanissen as rookie selections. This will just compound Carlton's disappointment as to Geelong's credit they managed to turn the Smedts selection into something decent while Carlton bought something and were delivered something else, like shopping from a discount online retailer:



Billie, good luck with whatever the hell it is you'll be doing next year. Welcome (again) to the Bottom 50.

 

[El Dubya]

Somebody once called me Billie Smedts, I never spoke to them again.

 

[Hap Hapablap]

If your mob didn’t have Priddis in the Elimination Final then they wouldn’t have been playing in a semi final the week after.

please. he had no influence to any of our games this season. not even that ef.

 

[TedDougChris]

Somebody once called me Billie Smedts, I never spoke to them again.

Fair enough too....

 

[JustaBattler]

Mofra - you could have equally gone Kerridge/Graham/Thomas/Buckley all similar spuds but instead went for the low risk call...what no multis?

 

[Beer n Skittles]

Billy goes missing so often Phil Collins wrote a song about it

 

[yyou]

Billy goes missing so often Phil Collins wrote a song about it

John Waite sang about him too

 

[Two Eyes]

I wonder who holds the record for the most bottom 50 appearances.

I'll leave that out there for someone 'on the spectrum*' to research and answer but Billy could be right up there.


* s**t! That must be me, or I'm really bored. Since 2013 we have the following with 3 or more appearances (too many dual entries to bother with).

3 Appearances:

Billy Smedts (including this year)
Jarrad Grant (including this year)
Liam Jones
Zac Clarke

4 Appearances (would be more if they were still on a list):

John Butcher
Jason Tutt

3 Appearances but guaranteed to make 4 this year and every chance of racking up more:

***Chris Mayne***

Interesting facts:

'Chris' is the most common name, featuring 8 appearances (thanks to Mayne, Yarran, Dawes and Newman)

We've had 4 different Ryans (Bastinac, Griffen, Lester and Schoenmakers) and 4 different Jakes (Batchelor, Carlisle, King, Melksham).

Luke Hodge polled no.1 twice, which means if he had three sons and called them Chris, Ryan and Jake they'd be the worst footballers of all time.

 

[TedDougChris]

Player 28 - Billie Smedts


Pictured: Billie's attempts to "smell what the Blues are cooking" backfires spectacularly

Another year, another Billie Smedts inclusion in the Bottom 50. He gets a few bonus points for spending a career thus far getting fans accustomed to underperformance, and then failing to meet those expectations. This time he managed to do so at a club that have been so poor this century they're rebuilding on a rebuild of a rebuild, the Melbourne Eye of the AFL.

Smedts was traded to Carlton from Geelong in a deal that included a future first from Geelong, a second round pick from Carlton and Zach Touhy which is both a handy footballer and the sound of a 75 year old man expelling phlegm. Canny trading like this has kept Geelong almost in contention for many years now, while trades like this show that the annual "pick up GWS rejects" strategy of SOS during trade week is not the worst thing Carlton can do.

Anyway, Smedts didn't do anything stupid off field this year (like take selfies while driving a Maloo ute circa Smedts 2013) so that's kind of a win. Unfortunately he was traded to play football, revealing the unfortunate flaw in Carlton's trade strategy.

Managing 9 games this year, Billie didn't exactly add to the aroma of Carlton's cooking in 2017. Managing the first two games this year, then getting dropped, then playing two games, getting dropped, playing one game, getting dropped, then finishing the year with four games so poor that pity must be the only reason for his selection - in two of those games he managed 5 touches each with an average of 1.5 kicks. The first of those 5 possession games was against Essendon, which included 3 clangers. Most Carlton fans would have enjoyed a Clayton Oliver death threat more than a review tape of Billie Smedts' performance.


"Gingers have souls!" - Clayton Oliver

It's worth pointing out that he was a first round draft pick in 2010, a year that included Dahlhaus and Johanissen as rookie selections. This will just compound Carlton's disappointment as to Geelong's credit they managed to turn the Smedts selection into something decent while Carlton bought something and were delivered something else, like shopping from a discount online retailer:



Billie, good luck with whatever the hell it is you'll be doing next year. Welcome (again) to the Bottom 50.

And not even a day after his inclusion, Billie is delisted by Carlton. What sort of influence does Mofra have at The Blues ??

 

[DapperJong]

He was better than Blaine

 

[TeeJay Blue]

Billy goes missing so often Phil Collins wrote a song about it

Tried too hard to be a hero as well.

 

[asanque]

He was better than Blaine

Blaine's tribute from the club
"Blaine arrived at the club as a 21-year-old and managed to string together 25 senior games in his three seasons at the club."

 

[TedDougChris]

He was better than Blaine

Some quality comedy drafting from Carlton that year....

 

[leobarryustar]

Luke Hodge polled no.1 twice

Wasn’t that a rickroll?

 

[3rd Grade Maggy]

Blaine's tribute from the club
"Blaine arrived at the club as a 21-year-old and managed to string together 25 senior games in his three seasons at the club."

Epic troll from McKay when you look at what he said about Smedts and White who also got the rissole today.

 

[Smeg Head]

Somebody once called me Billie Smedts, I never spoke to them again.

Billie Smedts looks nothing like Dave Warner.

 

[El Dubya]

Billie Smedts looks nothing like Dave Warner.

It was a sledge about my desire to win contested footy.

 

[Marklar_33]

Billie Smedts looks nothing like Dave Warner.

******* LOL!

 

[La Dispute]

We're also paying Billie to not play for us next year, preferring a pick in the 80's

 

[NSWCROW]

...........the * is a " Billie Smedts " ????