Mofra
Moderator
- Dec 6, 2005
- 67,092
- 198,374
- AFL Club
- Western Bulldogs
- Other Teams
- Footscray, Coney Island Warriors
- Moderator
- #1
Hi,
There are some excellent judges of talent on this board. I am not one of them. Every year people get passionate about the draft order only to be proven wrong, so I may as well join those ranks.
The following top 25 will in all likelihood bear no resemblance to reality.
Pick 1 - Brisbane - Will Ashcroft [Matched Bid]
Wil Ashcroft is being compared to Josh Daicos, which is a bit unfair. Every year a good kid gets the hype treatment and you’d think Will walks on water and shits ice cream. Brisbane should be rapt getting him though, as hindsight shows the no 1 pick is normally one of the best 15 kids in the draft.
Pick 2 - GWS - Aaron Cadman
GWS moved heaven and earth to get this kid, because they have had so many first round picks they don’t seem to hold much value. If he doesn’t develop the way we expect Carlton will be rapt with him.
Pick 3 - North Melbourne - Harry Sheezel
He has genuine X factor, he kicks goals but more importantly he likes ice baths. Will play next year because let’s face it – you’d want to try him out, wouldn’t you?
Pick 4 - North Melbourne - George Wardlaw
Only hamstrings have held him back from being the best kid this year. Kind of like me, where only athleticism, skill, ticker and a complete lack of talent held my football career back.
Pick 5 - Essendon – Jhye Clark
Apparently scores off the charts for character, but I’m sure Essendon can breed that out of him. Essendon fans would riot if they didn’t take an inside mid here, which makes no difference as their powerful coterie groups have water cannons.
Pick 6 - Gold Coast Suns - Bailey Humphrey
A powerful forward who can spray them, and an incredible athlete. Apparently, the Swans love him and Gold Coast would be wise to trust Sydney's recruiters instead of their own.
Pick 7 - Hawthorn - Elijah Tsatas
An ‘inside out’ midfielder which is far less graphic and anatomically educational than it sounds. Has Jack Macrae’s gait, sidestep and loopy high kicking. Will get games next season, after Sam Mitchell cut the list so hard half the magnet board will read “Hello, my name is Trainee” next year.
Pick 8 - Geelong - Cam MacKenzie
The Saints finally develop a gun mid who gets drafted inside the top 10. Unfortunately the saints don’t get him because the football gods are utter bastards when it comes to St Kilda. Geelong seem to do well with footballers named Cam.
Pick 9 - West Coast Eagles - Reuben Ginbey
“In the frame” for pick 5, Ginbey is a powerful mid who goes early after doing well at the combine.
Why an amateur draft watcher hasn’t patented the name “Combine Harvester” and delivered a wrap up of testing yet is anyone’s guess. Maybe they can’t be bothered paying $8 for the blue tick (or pay interstate footage)
Pick 10 - St Kilda - Mattaes Phillipou
Slips as he “interviews poorly” which is a stupid reason for a kid to fall down the order. You’re drafting footballers, not Ray Martin. His dad played for the Bulldogs and with all their father son success over the years, the Saints find a way to game the system and finally nail a first rounder.
Pick 11 - Carlton – Oliver Hollands
Carlton fans are certain he lands here – but given how well Carlton have been going with predictions, there’s every chance that Hollands slips to pick 43, and just as he’s drafted 4 kids and a talking dog rock up in a colourful van, unmasking him as a 51 year old janitor.
Pick 12 - Western Bulldogs - Ed Allan
Hawthorn and Freo are spewing they don’t get access to Allen, who is tall, quick, and raw as hell. Despite not having a s**t haircut, the Bulldogs jump early as they think Bailey Smith and Aaron Naughton can mentor him. Runs fast, just as most Footscray fans did in the 80s with a VCR under one arm.
Pick 13 - West Coast Eagles - Elijah Hewett
Every lazy draft person on Bigfooty takes WA kids with West Coast picks, and I’m not one for breaking with tradition. I’m lazier than most – I didn’t even get a birthmark until I was 6.
Pick 14 - Melbourne - Matthew Jefferson
Apparently he’s a tall forward, but that’s irrelevant. Melbourne take him here as that name sounds like he’s the most likely to order a trout pate charcuterie board out of the entire draft class.
Pick 15 - Sydney - Charlie Clarke
Sydney march to the beat of their own drum and have apparently interviewed him a heap of times. That’s nothing though, the police interviewed my uncle a heap of times and he’s yet to join the police force. Only choosing him here based on the rumours thread, and BigFooty rumours are always 100% true.
Pick 16 - GWS - Darcy Jones
Probably the best kid in the draft, runs hard between contests, uses it well, but he slips because he’s short even though he can seriously play. BigFooty (and recruiters) are more heightist than most girls on Tinder.
Pick 17 - Essendon - Alwyn Davey [Matched Bid]
Just because
Pick 18 - Brisbane - Jaspa Fletcher [Matched Bid]
Ditto
Pick 19 - Collingwood - Lewis Hayes
Again, a rumour based suggestion. A solid, no nonsense defender. Voted “least likely to take a mid season holiday to Bali” among the draft class of 2022. Seems a tiny bit like Jordan Roughead who was one of the best blokes in football. Probably the smartest pick in the teens, and I hate praising Collingwood.
Pick 20 - Sydney - Harry Barnett
The first ruck picked this year. Another rumour pick. I know nothing about him but that won’t stop me having strong opinions about him, like everyone else here. Sydney know what they’re doing though.
Pick 21 - GWS - Jacob Konstanty
Averages a ridiculous number of tackles per game for a small forward. Can be a little slow getting boot to ball to the eyeball test, but coaches love defensive effort. If he doesn’t get nicknamed “George” GWS should have their licence revoked.
Pick 22 - GWS - Jedd Busslinger
Slides in my view because he was a spectator as Jefferson kicked 7 in the Vic M vs WA game. Kicks the ball well but double-grabs marks too often for my liking. Positioning is excellent though.
Pick 23 - West Coast Eagles - Brayden George
I really want the Bulldogs to grab him, so west Coast get their man here. Probably a top 5 player in the draft but everyone forgets drafting is a long term proposition so he slips. Has been compared to Petracca which is unfair on St Kilda to remind them once again what they passed on.
Pick 24 - Western Bulldogs - Olli Hotton
Runs hard and kicks well, so no idea why he seems like an ‘unsexy’ pick.
Personally, anyone describing a draft pick as ‘sexy’ probably should be on some sort of register anyway.
Pick 25 - North Melbourne - Josh Weddle
Tested well, perhaps a little short for a KPD at only 2cm taller than Stephen May.
Projects as a Dale Morris type who can actually stop a forward, which is rare these days as most recruiters want a defender who rebounds like Taylor Swift in a trampoline factory.
There are some excellent judges of talent on this board. I am not one of them. Every year people get passionate about the draft order only to be proven wrong, so I may as well join those ranks.
The following top 25 will in all likelihood bear no resemblance to reality.
Pick 1 - Brisbane - Will Ashcroft [Matched Bid]
Wil Ashcroft is being compared to Josh Daicos, which is a bit unfair. Every year a good kid gets the hype treatment and you’d think Will walks on water and shits ice cream. Brisbane should be rapt getting him though, as hindsight shows the no 1 pick is normally one of the best 15 kids in the draft.
Pick 2 - GWS - Aaron Cadman
GWS moved heaven and earth to get this kid, because they have had so many first round picks they don’t seem to hold much value. If he doesn’t develop the way we expect Carlton will be rapt with him.
Pick 3 - North Melbourne - Harry Sheezel
He has genuine X factor, he kicks goals but more importantly he likes ice baths. Will play next year because let’s face it – you’d want to try him out, wouldn’t you?
Pick 4 - North Melbourne - George Wardlaw
Only hamstrings have held him back from being the best kid this year. Kind of like me, where only athleticism, skill, ticker and a complete lack of talent held my football career back.
Pick 5 - Essendon – Jhye Clark
Apparently scores off the charts for character, but I’m sure Essendon can breed that out of him. Essendon fans would riot if they didn’t take an inside mid here, which makes no difference as their powerful coterie groups have water cannons.
Pick 6 - Gold Coast Suns - Bailey Humphrey
A powerful forward who can spray them, and an incredible athlete. Apparently, the Swans love him and Gold Coast would be wise to trust Sydney's recruiters instead of their own.
Pick 7 - Hawthorn - Elijah Tsatas
An ‘inside out’ midfielder which is far less graphic and anatomically educational than it sounds. Has Jack Macrae’s gait, sidestep and loopy high kicking. Will get games next season, after Sam Mitchell cut the list so hard half the magnet board will read “Hello, my name is Trainee” next year.
Pick 8 - Geelong - Cam MacKenzie
The Saints finally develop a gun mid who gets drafted inside the top 10. Unfortunately the saints don’t get him because the football gods are utter bastards when it comes to St Kilda. Geelong seem to do well with footballers named Cam.
Pick 9 - West Coast Eagles - Reuben Ginbey
“In the frame” for pick 5, Ginbey is a powerful mid who goes early after doing well at the combine.
Why an amateur draft watcher hasn’t patented the name “Combine Harvester” and delivered a wrap up of testing yet is anyone’s guess. Maybe they can’t be bothered paying $8 for the blue tick (or pay interstate footage)
Pick 10 - St Kilda - Mattaes Phillipou
Slips as he “interviews poorly” which is a stupid reason for a kid to fall down the order. You’re drafting footballers, not Ray Martin. His dad played for the Bulldogs and with all their father son success over the years, the Saints find a way to game the system and finally nail a first rounder.
Pick 11 - Carlton – Oliver Hollands
Carlton fans are certain he lands here – but given how well Carlton have been going with predictions, there’s every chance that Hollands slips to pick 43, and just as he’s drafted 4 kids and a talking dog rock up in a colourful van, unmasking him as a 51 year old janitor.
Pick 12 - Western Bulldogs - Ed Allan
Hawthorn and Freo are spewing they don’t get access to Allen, who is tall, quick, and raw as hell. Despite not having a s**t haircut, the Bulldogs jump early as they think Bailey Smith and Aaron Naughton can mentor him. Runs fast, just as most Footscray fans did in the 80s with a VCR under one arm.
Pick 13 - West Coast Eagles - Elijah Hewett
Every lazy draft person on Bigfooty takes WA kids with West Coast picks, and I’m not one for breaking with tradition. I’m lazier than most – I didn’t even get a birthmark until I was 6.
Pick 14 - Melbourne - Matthew Jefferson
Apparently he’s a tall forward, but that’s irrelevant. Melbourne take him here as that name sounds like he’s the most likely to order a trout pate charcuterie board out of the entire draft class.
Pick 15 - Sydney - Charlie Clarke
Sydney march to the beat of their own drum and have apparently interviewed him a heap of times. That’s nothing though, the police interviewed my uncle a heap of times and he’s yet to join the police force. Only choosing him here based on the rumours thread, and BigFooty rumours are always 100% true.
Pick 16 - GWS - Darcy Jones
Probably the best kid in the draft, runs hard between contests, uses it well, but he slips because he’s short even though he can seriously play. BigFooty (and recruiters) are more heightist than most girls on Tinder.
Pick 17 - Essendon - Alwyn Davey [Matched Bid]
Just because
Pick 18 - Brisbane - Jaspa Fletcher [Matched Bid]
Ditto
Pick 19 - Collingwood - Lewis Hayes
Again, a rumour based suggestion. A solid, no nonsense defender. Voted “least likely to take a mid season holiday to Bali” among the draft class of 2022. Seems a tiny bit like Jordan Roughead who was one of the best blokes in football. Probably the smartest pick in the teens, and I hate praising Collingwood.
Pick 20 - Sydney - Harry Barnett
The first ruck picked this year. Another rumour pick. I know nothing about him but that won’t stop me having strong opinions about him, like everyone else here. Sydney know what they’re doing though.
Pick 21 - GWS - Jacob Konstanty
Averages a ridiculous number of tackles per game for a small forward. Can be a little slow getting boot to ball to the eyeball test, but coaches love defensive effort. If he doesn’t get nicknamed “George” GWS should have their licence revoked.
Pick 22 - GWS - Jedd Busslinger
Slides in my view because he was a spectator as Jefferson kicked 7 in the Vic M vs WA game. Kicks the ball well but double-grabs marks too often for my liking. Positioning is excellent though.
Pick 23 - West Coast Eagles - Brayden George
I really want the Bulldogs to grab him, so west Coast get their man here. Probably a top 5 player in the draft but everyone forgets drafting is a long term proposition so he slips. Has been compared to Petracca which is unfair on St Kilda to remind them once again what they passed on.
Pick 24 - Western Bulldogs - Olli Hotton
Runs hard and kicks well, so no idea why he seems like an ‘unsexy’ pick.
Personally, anyone describing a draft pick as ‘sexy’ probably should be on some sort of register anyway.
Pick 25 - North Melbourne - Josh Weddle
Tested well, perhaps a little short for a KPD at only 2cm taller than Stephen May.
Projects as a Dale Morris type who can actually stop a forward, which is rare these days as most recruiters want a defender who rebounds like Taylor Swift in a trampoline factory.
