My fears of making the Grand Final

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And it’s a shame. I actually really like Richmond’s list and a lot of their players; they’re become very well run as a club and they truly deserve to be contending for a flag yet again. However most of their supporters are unbelievably petty and tiresome that they don’t deserve to see their team succeed. It was only until a handful of years ago that I considered Richmond a “second team” of mine (whereby I didn’t mind seeing them get on a good run).


Same here. My wife and her family are Tigers supporters and they've been OK. Very respectful of Collingwood, probably because they know how much I love the club.

The Richmond board has managed to eradicate any goodwill that had been built over the last 26 years that I've been happily married. Insufferable.
 
After watching too many GF losses,i always dread making it and at the same time knowning that the only way we can win it we have to be in in.What makes the losses hurt more is the way we lose them,we always seem to be on the wrong end of the big decision/moment or have a really good chance in the game and can't get it done in any close GF's.Those 70's/80's losses still annoy me when i see them on tv at this time of the year,but i must admit 90 was a dream,and maybe losing all those GF's made that one even more sweeter.With our record in close GF's i was wondering how many goals would we need to be in front by at say 3 qtr time to be safe,i said to my brother,i reckon 6 goals should do it,he said back to me,no 6 goals with 5 mins to go,i knew what he meant.
Anyway we have to get there first,and hopefully we can go one better then last year.
 
I thought long and hard about NOT falling into the trap of responding to this title, but in the end I felt I just had to have a say.
Stating that you FEAR a negative outcome....sheeesh....did you ever have to contend with "The Colliwobbles?" that little piece of media BS dreamt up by Louie Richards haunted thousands of supporters and their bretheren for decades until it was buried by the legends of 1990.
And now you want to fuel that BS again?

All clubs play footy to make it to the big dance don't they? We're in a position to play in another one and you wanna get SCARED by the prospect? I don't care that we played in one last year and fell short. (I was and am still proud of all our players and all our teams that tried to win GF's)

We've got just as much right to feel confident or positive about our chances and lets face it, until we're out of the hunt, then we're still a big chance. Footy's a game. In games you try to win but you have to be prepared to lose and to take those losses on the chin.

We're Collingwood for goodness sakes. We ask no favours, we take no prisoners, we stick up for our own. Scared? Of NO-ONE.
Your words sound persuasive but they don't change how I feel. I love this club as deeply as anyone could possibly imagine. Five generations of my family have been born into the black and white. The Pies are a huge part of our lives. My brother and I used to go back to Vic Park in recent years and sit in the Sherrin Stand and reflect on the glory days when we sat with our dad on the wing and roared ourselves hoarse as our boys stormed home.

My home is more like a museum dedicated to the Collingwood Football Club. I have five season tickets dating back to 1897, 1898. 1899, 1900 and 1901. framed and hanging on my wall. They were passed on to me by my dear dad. I have a piece of a seat from the Sherrin stand hanging on a beam above our kitchen bench. I could go on. I have other framed pictures all over the walls in our living room. My book shelves have a large section put aside for my veritable library of books about Collingwood.

Of course I lived through the days of the dreaded "colliwobbles". I don't care if we lost all those grand finals because we choked or simply because we weren't good enough. All I remember is the pain and grief attached to those losses. Maybe I just feel things more deeply than some. I've heard many people say they weren't too upset after losing last year's grand final because it was a great season and we played really well. I find this attitude quiet unbelievable. I was shattered. The chance to have what had been an incredible year capped with a flag which would immortalize Bucks and forever be there in the history books snatched from us in the final minute after a series of football flukes which could never be repeated in a season of footy played by the Eagles is as bitter a pill as an footy fan should be expected to swallow. We were two minutes away from the greatest premiership victory in our club's history. I could have lived off the DVD of that final series and the associated books for the rest of my days. But no, just when I dared to dream after those two inspiring goals at the start of the last term (which had me embracing my son as well as total strangers) the gods once again said -oh no you don't, Collingwood don't win close grand finals-not ever.

So when I have endured this feeling on countless occasions I am entitled to state that I fear experiencing that pain again. I am not scared of any team. I am scared of the searing heartbreak-especially if it is another close one which turns on an umpire's decision or a bad bounce.

Of course I will be there. Of course I will scream my lungs out. I will endure the prelim and then hopefully another grand final. I just thought I could express what I was feeling with my Collingwood brothers and sisters as a way of coping with the gnawing anxiety.
 

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3. Don't get your hopes up if we're in front. The trick here is to remain balanced.

THis........but I remain unbalanced. The further we got out in front in the first quarter in last years GF the bigger the feeling of dread as my mind ran through the likely scenario of us blowing that lead. It's ingrained at this point :(
 
Also, would rather make a GF than not. It is a great week that 16 other clubs will be envious of.

For the OP, just remember the episode of Seinfeld where George and Elaine burst into Jerry's apartment after being at some sporting event. 'We won, we won'
Jerry replies ' No, the team won, you just watched them'. Puts a bit of perspective into the equation.

Jerry reminds me of my son in law who is an electrical engineer and engages in car racing as a hobby. He cannot comprehend how any human being can become a hysterical mess watching other men run around in a colored jumper chasing some pigskin. But Jerry and my son in law are the ones I feel sorry for. It may be illogical but the euphoria you experience when you are as one with your tribe, roaring in ecstasy when the siren signals you are in another preliminary final is beyond words. The connection to your team is tribal and no doubt in our DNA through evolution. That doesn't make the passion and heartache any less exhilarating or painful. It's like trying to explain to a robot the joy of falling in love or the thrill of your first kiss with the girl of your dreams. Anything can be reduced to a nihilistic joke by a cynic.
 
Your words sound persuasive but they don't change how I feel. I love this club as deeply as anyone could possibly imagine. Five generations of my family have been born into the black and white. The Pies are a huge part of our lives. My brother and I used to go back to Vic Park in recent years and sit in the Sherrin Stand and reflect on the glory days when we sat with our dad on the wing and roared ourselves hoarse as our boys stormed home.

My home is more like a museum dedicated to the Collingwood Football Club. I have five season tickets dating back to 1897, 1898. 1899, 1900 and 1901. framed and hanging on my wall. They were passed on to me by my dear dad. I have a piece of a seat from the Sherrin stand hanging on a beam above our kitchen bench. I could go on. I have other framed pictures all over the walls in our living room. My book shelves have a large section put aside for my veritable library of books about Collingwood.

Of course I lived through the days of the dreaded "colliwobbles". I don't care if we lost all those grand finals because we choked or simply because we weren't good enough. All I remember is the pain and grief attached to those losses. Maybe I just feel things more deeply than some. I've heard many people say they weren't too upset after losing last year's grand final because it was a great season and we played really well. I find this attitude quiet unbelievable. I was shattered. The chance to have what had been an incredible year capped with a flag which would immortalize Bucks and forever be there in the history books snatched from us in the final minute after a series of football flukes which could never be repeated in a season of footy played by the Eagles is as bitter a pill as an footy fan should be expected to swallow. We were two minutes away from the greatest premiership victory in our club's history. I could have lived off the DVD of that final series and the associated books for the rest of my days. But no, just when I dared to dream after those two inspiring goals at the start of the last term (which had me embracing my son as well as total strangers) the gods once again said -oh no you don't, Collingwood don't win close grand finals-not ever.

So when I have endured this feeling on countless occasions I am entitled to state that I fear experiencing that pain again. I am not scared of any team. I am scared of the searing heartbreak-especially if it is another close one which turns on an umpire's decision or a bad bounce.

Of course I will be there. Of course I will scream my lungs out. I will endure the prelim and then hopefully another grand final. I just thought I could express what I was feeling with my Collingwood brothers and sisters as a way of coping with the gnawing anxiety.
bravo :)
 
THis........but I remain unbalanced. The further we got out in front in the first quarter in last years GF the bigger the feeling of dread as my mind ran through the likely scenario of us blowing that lead. It's ingrained at this point :(

well there's only a few weeks to go so it's hard to turn this around in a short period.

However, you might want to look at some long term fixes. Pick up a team in the Premier League or the NBA ....any team will do....although it has to be reasonably successful. Actually, better still, pick up several teams in several sports. Now barrack for them with all your might. Google them regularly and stay up with all the news. You might assistant yourself getting an emotional attachment to them by betting on them...

What you'll find is that when they reach finals and lose .... you really want give a crap. You'll watch the games and from the outside it would appear that you really want them to win....but in the end if they lose you really wont give a crap...

And you'll find that this behaviour will rub off on to your support for the Pies. It mightn't totally cure you but it will numb you a little.

Other than that, try alcohol or drugs...
 
since my last post I found out about Spud Frawley. I feel kind of bad now for feeling sorry for myself. It is just a game. I guess the club has become something I identify with and love and I want good things to happen for people who feel the same way. But if we lose - we will all be fine. Lets just get on with it and enjoy the highs more.

Yes it is but that doesn't diminish the importance of football in the lives of people. I remember a woman rang in to 3AW after Collingwood lost the flag to Brisbane in 2002. She wanted to voice her disgust over the fact that Licuria and Malthouse were crying over a game of football and she wondered how they could do this in a world where kids are starving to death, thousands of people are dying in wars and others lying in cancer wards. She is a fool. Malthouse has suffered the loss of loved ones to cancer. He has probably suffered any other losses. Why should he not be able to cry over the loss of a grand final? It's not a contest. I wept when my dad, mum and brother died and I have cried over Collingwood's footy losses or when saying goodbye to a class of kids I have loved. Does that mean all of these experiences are on the same level? Of course not. It simply means there are many different kinds of grief and no-one should have to apologise for feeling what they feel.

Two days before my brother died I was telling him that Darcy Moore and Elliott came through a practice match unscathed and he smiled and gave me a thumbs up. When I was crook with cancer years ago, I wandered up and down the corridors of the Monash medical centre oncology ward with my drip stand attached and dragging behind me, my stomach in knots as St Kilda held off a late comeback in a semi final out at Waverley in 1992.

Family and friend will always take precedence over footy, but Collingwood is not passing fancy or hobby in our family. Good old Collingwood blared out at my dad's funeral and my brother's coffin had a Collingwood jumper on it among other things.

Floreat Pica
 
its funny how so many opposition fans come on here or even the main board and say how bad Richmond fans are, most of them truly are the scum of all Afl supporters and I am glad we are not the only ones that see that.

Most people I speak too at work and friends and family are all saying that if the pies play the tigers grand final most people will be supporting the pies for the reason that they cannot stand the arrogance of the Richmond supporters!! Might be the first time ever that majority of Victoria will be behind Collingwood if they don’t follow Richmond
 
Yes it is but that doesn't diminish the importance of football in the lives of people. I remember a woman rang in to 3AW after Collingwood lost the flag to Brisbane in 2002. She wanted to voice her disgust over the fact that Licuria and Malthouse were crying over a game of football and she wondered how they could do this in a world where kids are starving to death, thousands of people are dying in wars and others lying in cancer wards. She is a fool. Malthouse has suffered the loss of loved ones to cancer. He has probably suffered any other losses. Why should he not be able to cry over the loss of a grand final? It's not a contest. I wept when my dad, mum and brother died and I have cried over Collingwood's footy losses or when saying goodbye to a class of kids I have loved. Does that mean all of these experiences are on the same level? Of course not. It simply means there are many different kinds of grief and no-one should have to apologise for feeling what they feel.

Two days before my brother died I was telling him that Darcy Moore and Elliott came through a practice match unscathed and he smiled and gave me a thumbs up. When I was crook with cancer years ago, I wandered up and down the corridors of the Monash medical centre oncology ward with my drip stand attached and dragging behind me, my stomach in knots as St Kilda held off a late comeback in a semi final out at Waverley in 1992.

Family and friend will always take precedence over footy, but Collingwood is not passing fancy or hobby in our family. Good old Collingwood blared out at my dad's funeral and my brother's coffin had a Collingwood jumper on it among other things.

Floreat Pica
Yeah.Good response. Well done on starting an important thread and following it through. Given a lot of us plenty to think about. I'm part of a Pies dynasty too started by my grandfather who migrated here. All my kids and grandkids are devoted Pies. Despite all the tragedy I actually count myself lucky that this is how it turned out and that we are all part of this wonderful club and tribe.
 
The best thing for us is to go in as underdogs with no one giving us a chance. Richmond would be be suit for us because everyone would be tipping them to win so the expectation won’t be their as much. Unfortunately the biggest issue with the Collingwood FC I’m previous GFs has been trying to cope with the weight of expectations from our supporters and the Melbourne Medus media.......still a long way to go tho still have to beat either Brisbane or the Giants
 
I think I have one too many scars. I actually feel sick at the thought of making the grand final. Yet I understand that the only way we can achieve the ultimate dream is to walk through the furnace and hope the gods are kind. I actually told my son I don't think I can attend or watch the granny if we do make it. I think our opponent will either be Richmond or the Eagles. I don't think the Cats will get through. The very thought of losing another grand final to either of these teams makes me feel ill. My other fear is that another GF loss will break the heart and spirit of Bucks and the players making our hopes of premiership success even more unlikely in the coming years.

I suppose it's the dilemma any person who has experienced heartbreak in a relationship feels when they finally emerge from their grief and battered self esteem and meet someone they like. Do they pursue the new relationship and hope this one brings true happiness and love or is the risk of further heartbreak and pain too much to contemplate. Is it better not to reach out for the dream and simply become accustomed to living a quiet, less passionate existence but one that is free of the agony we experience when we lose something so precious?

No doubt, if we do make it, I will probably try to get tickets and endure yet another torturous afternoon because there is always that very slight (but highly unlikely) chance we could have a miraculous win which would provide me with memories I will carry to my grave. If only I could live in the moment and simply enjoy the fact that we are in with a chance and our hopes are still alive.

Oh well, time will tell.
All true, though, as with Frawley's passing, match day is just a game and there are much more profound events in life, birth and death heading the table. Flags in 3rd place!



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Most people I speak too at work and friends and family are all saying that if the pies play the tigers grand final most people will be supporting the pies for the reason that they cannot stand the arrogance of the Richmond supporters!! Might be the first time ever that majority of Victoria will be behind Collingwood if they don’t follow Richmond
I don't like that phenomenon one bit. We are best when loathed by all. I won't accept being the 2nd most loathed!

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I'm not such a longtime supporter of the club as you all, so perhaps I'm not qualified to talk about these things yet.

I felt awfully sick turning off the television seconds before the siren last year. Because I didn't have the spine to watch the joy of the Other Guys. I didn't want to endure shots of celebration before a couple of courtesy shots of some collapsed Pie staring into space...

This year, with all the stuff this club has been through? Even to have to experience the agony again... it's still been a hell of a ride.

Here in the US I've been an Oakland Raiders supporter my whole life. My connection to them is similar to a lot of the connections with Collingwood discussed in this thread. In 2003 when I was 7 they lost the Super Bowl... in a game that was over at half-time. From then until 2017, the Raiders did not have a playoff appearance or a winning season. 14 years of misery and irrelevance, yelling at the tv wit my dad... I would love to see them make it to the super bowl again, even to lose it.

So I know the agony of losing a GF can be soul-crushing... but at least our beloved Pies give us the chance to feel that agony, which is the only way we might oneday feel that joy.
 
Although l understand the op, seen most of our loses since 66 when l was a kid, it’s always better to lose a grand final, to be never in it.
Gone through the the so called colliewobbles, dark days, but next time we made it, back to thinking this is the year till it 1990 happened.
Pain of losing can be bad, but when we win well words struggle from me to explain how great it is.
Grand finals everyday day of the week
 
its funny how so many opposition fans come on here or even the main board and say how bad Richmond fans are, most of them truly are the scum of all Afl supporters and I am glad we are not the only ones that see that.
I believe it is only BF Richmond fans. I know several Richmond fans and none are like the BF tribe.
My father who passed away many years ago went to nearly every Richmond game. Never once did I hear any arr0gance or Pies hatred. In fact, he quite liked the Pies. Maybe it was because his sister married Jack Regan's brother, so we have the family connection.

The Richmond fans on BF are an embarrassment to supporters like most Richmond fans I have known. Because of my father, I have a soft spot for the Tigers.
 
I do. When we won in the 2010 GF I felt nothing but compassion for the broken saints supporters. All I copped for most of the grand final defeats I witnessed was in your face comments about Colliwobbles and F U's. I must say the Eagles fans last year were good-no nasty rubbing salt into the wounds. nevertheless the Saints haven't experienced the same level of heartache as Pie fans. The draw with us and the loss to the Cats would have been painful, but we have at least ten gf's we could have won with ten minutes to go. Saying we have won lots more flags is no consolation cause since my birth we have only won one more than them but lost 13. I don't get any joy out of flags won in the 1920's although I love reading about our illustrious history.
Worst case of opposition fans came from the Carlton President George f..n Harris. After the 1979 GF, he stated 'What's better than beating Collingwood by 10 goals Beating them by 5 points'.

If you can't be a good winner. It says a lot of horrible things about the soul of a man.

I knew a Carlton player who played in that game. He said he, and a lot of the players, were absolutely embarrassed by Harris and his big mouth.
 
Yes it is but that doesn't diminish the importance of football in the lives of people. I remember a woman rang in to 3AW after Collingwood lost the flag to Brisbane in 2002. She wanted to voice her disgust over the fact that Licuria and Malthouse were crying over a game of football and she wondered how they could do this in a world where kids are starving to death, thousands of people are dying in wars and others lying in cancer wards. She is a fool. Malthouse has suffered the loss of loved ones to cancer. He has probably suffered any other losses. Why should he not be able to cry over the loss of a grand final? It's not a contest. I wept when my dad, mum and brother died and I have cried over Collingwood's footy losses or when saying goodbye to a class of kids I have loved. Does that mean all of these experiences are on the same level? Of course not. It simply means there are many different kinds of grief and no-one should have to apologise for feeling what they feel.

Two days before my brother died I was telling him that Darcy Moore and Elliott came through a practice match unscathed and he smiled and gave me a thumbs up. When I was crook with cancer years ago, I wandered up and down the corridors of the Monash medical centre oncology ward with my drip stand attached and dragging behind me, my stomach in knots as St Kilda held off a late comeback in a semi final out at Waverley in 1992.

Family and friend will always take precedence over footy, but Collingwood is not passing fancy or hobby in our family. Good old Collingwood blared out at my dad's funeral and my brother's coffin had a Collingwood jumper on it among other things.

Floreat Pica

A bit harsh saying that the woman was a fool because she had a good point about suffering in the world, but the people who should be her target are the one that cause the death and destruction, not the people who show emotion at footy games.
 
I feel the OP's pain. I'm only 33, so have only had to deal with the scars of 02,03,11 and 18. So some of the older posters will have many more scars than myself. But it's definitely gut-wrenching stuff.

i went to the game on Friday night with my brother-in-law. He actually said he hates this time of the year and gets no enjoyment out of it. He gets so tense, and he has seen too many tight losses to enjoy it anymore. He'll keep going because he loves Collingwood, but he actually dreads it.

I think we just need to take solace in the fact that we spent so many years out of the top 8 and we were longing to be competitive again. Now that we have returned to the finals, this is a new team with a new attitude. The scars of the past don't haunt them like they haunt us. They carry no baggage.

I'm just glad I support a team where I can go to the footy week in week out and enjoy a competitive match. Even at our lowest under Buckley, I've never gone into a game thinking we were no chance. Unlike many other sides over the last decades where you knew they weren't trying or had no hope.

You gotta be in it to win it. In the end, at least I can say I saw my side win a premiership in 2010. My dad is a saints fan and has never seen his side win a flag in 60 years. So that has eased the pain somewhat after a traumatic decade during the 2000s.

It's going to be a tough few weeks, but it's all worth it for even the slightest chance of the ultimate glory. And at least with this group, I know they'll give 110%
Saints beat us by a point, in the 60's I think. one of the more painful of many painful GF defeats.
 

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