My old man and nostalgia

(Log in to remove this ad.)

Darbs662

Premium Platinum
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Posts
870
Likes
753
AFL Club
Adelaide
#52
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with a low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Wilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.
Probably the greatest post I have seen on this website 🙏🙏🙏.
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2006
Posts
36,463
Likes
60,131
Location
#rentfree in Cats and Magpie supporters heads.
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Aston Villa, Traralgon Tyers United
#56
My old man was too busy trying to put food on the table for us to really do fun stuff (was a farmer in Sth Gippy). I now make sure i do a heap of cool shit with my kids from taking them to the footy, concerts (just saw RHCP with my oldest and now got tickets to Metallica and Slipnot), playing sport with them and coaching/coached them as well. I also do some gaming with them. One day i hope they'll say the old man was ok. One of the best parts of the day is sitting at the table with them during dinner and asking them how their day was. They are a couple of loose units (particularly the youngest). I don't mind that at all.
 

Geelong Dynasty

16 PREMIERSHIPS
Day Off
Joined
Oct 1, 2011
Posts
14,915
Likes
20,012
Location
VFA-VFL-AFL 16 flags and counting
AFL Club
Geelong
Other Teams
THE GREATEST TEAM OF ALL
#57
My old man was too busy trying to put food on the table for us to really do fun stuff (was a farmer in Sth Gippy). I now make sure i do a heap of cool shit with my kids from taking them to the footy, concerts (just saw RHCP with my oldest and now got tickets to Metallica and Slipnot), playing sport with them and coaching/coached them as well. I also do some gaming with them. One day i hope they'll say the old man was ok. One of the best parts of the day is sitting at the table with them during dinner and asking them how their day was. They are a couple of loose units (particularly the youngest). I don't mind that at all.
How much were the Metallica tix? where are you seeing them?
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2006
Posts
36,463
Likes
60,131
Location
#rentfree in Cats and Magpie supporters heads.
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Aston Villa, Traralgon Tyers United
#58
How much were the Metallica tix? where are you seeing them?
I got them at a fanclub presale on the Metallica website. Going to the marvel stadium gig. Wanted standing but got seated. I wanted a good experience so payed over $500 for 2.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Geelong Dynasty

16 PREMIERSHIPS
Day Off
Joined
Oct 1, 2011
Posts
14,915
Likes
20,012
Location
VFA-VFL-AFL 16 flags and counting
AFL Club
Geelong
Other Teams
THE GREATEST TEAM OF ALL
#59
I got them at a fanclub presale on the Metallica website. Going to the marvel stadium gig. Wanted standing but got seated. I wanted a good experience so payed over $500 for 2.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Yeah getting mine tomorrow $250 each
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2006
Posts
36,463
Likes
60,131
Location
#rentfree in Cats and Magpie supporters heads.
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Aston Villa, Traralgon Tyers United
#60
Yeah getting mine tomorrow $250 each
Worth the price. I was watching 2019 concerts of Slipnot and Metallica in my gym last night. It’s not gonna disappoint.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Tiger2709

Brownlow Medallist
Joined
Aug 27, 2009
Posts
23,509
Likes
19,735
Location
Perth
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Liverpool
#61
My Dad used to like a drink, well more than like, I recall as a 12 year old when he explained that there was only one time to visit church and that was on Christmas eve for a free wine, so we walked down to the local well Dad staggered and both enjoyed a nice free glass of red, thankfully Dad was a happy drunk.
 

(Log in to remove this ad.)

OnTheRocks

Club Legend
Joined
Mar 11, 2016
Posts
2,804
Likes
3,561
AFL Club
Hawthorn
#62
I wanted a good experience so payed over $500 for 2.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Hmmmm $500 to see a money hungry band that destroyed napster and a support act (shitknot) that they would never have toured with back when they gave a damn.
Hope ya have a good time n the song line up looks decent, pity about the encores tho.

But we'll never stop, we'll never quit, 'cause we're Metallica
 

SaltPeter

"I’m a professional bullshitter"
Joined
Jan 6, 2018
Posts
5,111
Likes
5,622
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
Norwood
Thread starter #63
I remember this time the old man went into town 1 Saturday morning and bought a gasket for the Kingswood. I would've been about 5 years old. I can't remember if it was a water pump or timing cover gasket, anyway it doesn't matter. It was a thin cardboard gasket.

While he was gone I dragged my lazy arse out of bed and gorged myself on whatever mum put in front of me .. :thumbsu:

Anyway, when the old man got back he parked the Kingwood in front of the workshop and started stripping it down. By this stage i"d finished breakfast and wandered out to ask him lots of stupid questions, offer my help and generally give him the shits.

Mum ****** off and took my sister somewhere, netball, shopping (I didn't care). I start to realise I not going to be helping on this little project, so plant my arse on top of the bench. Anyway, dad's buried his head under the bonnet and keeps pulling shit apart. I find a seat on the bench and find this funny cardboard looking thing. As my boredom escalates I start tearing the funny cardboard thing into neat little 2mm pieces. And due to my need to be neat, I start to create a little pile of these small pieces.

Anyway, I finish playing with the funny cardboard thing and my mind drifts off onto my fun subjects, until .. half an hour later the old man comes over and starts searching around me. For something.

After a few minutes he asks me if I've seen the gasket. I look at him and shrug my shoulders and point at the little pile of torn up cardboard and say "what, this". He looked at me, threw his head back, his mouth partially opened, his hands also spread open near his waist (in a "your got to be ******* joking" expression). He didn't say much, he just shrugged turned and said "I've got to got to town to pick up a new gasket".

****** lol, with mum away he had walk a few miles into to town to get a new gasket. And then walk a few miles back.
 

OnTheRocks

Club Legend
Joined
Mar 11, 2016
Posts
2,804
Likes
3,561
AFL Club
Hawthorn
#64
I remember this time the old man went into town 1 Saturday morning and bought a gasket for the Kingswood. I would've been about 5 years old. I can't remember if it was a water pump or timing cover gasket, anyway it doesn't matter. It was a thin cardboard gasket.

While he was gone I dragged my lazy arse out of bed and gorged myself on whatever mum put in front of me .. :thumbsu:

Anyway, when the old man got back he parked the Kingwood in front of the workshop and started stripping it down. By this stage i"d finished breakfast and wandered out to ask him lots of stupid questions, offer my help and generally give him the shits.

Mum ****** off and took my sister somewhere, netball, shopping (I didn't care). I start to realise I not going to be helping on this little project, so plant my arse on top of the bench. Anyway, dad's buried his head under the bonnet and keeps pulling shit apart. I find a seat on the bench and find this funny cardboard looking thing. As my boredom escalates I start tearing the funny cardboard thing into neat little 2mm pieces. And due to my need to be neat, I start to create a little pile of these small pieces.

Anyway, I finish playing with the funny cardboard thing and my mind drifts off onto my fun subjects, until .. half an hour later the old man comes over and starts searching around me. For something.

After a few minutes he asks me if I've seen the gasket. I look at him and shrug my shoulders and point at the little pile of torn up cardboard and say "what, this". He looked at me, threw his head back, his mouth partially opened, his hands also spread open near his waist (in a "your got to be ******* joking" expression). He didn't say much, he just shrugged turned and said "I've got to got to town to pick up a new gasket".

****** lol, with mum away he had walk a few miles into to town to get a new gasket. And then walk a few miles back.
Silly old bugger coulda made one out of the cereal box ya mum probs had in the cupboard.
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2006
Posts
36,463
Likes
60,131
Location
#rentfree in Cats and Magpie supporters heads.
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Aston Villa, Traralgon Tyers United
#66
Hmmmm $500 to see a money hungry band that destroyed napster and a support act (shitknot) that they would never have toured with back when they gave a damn.
Hope ya have a good time n the song line up looks decent, pity about the encores tho.

But we'll never stop, we'll never quit, 'cause we're Metallica
You don’t understand. Lars needs that 5th gold plated bath tub in his mansion.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Bigeasy

Brownlow Medallist
Joined
Apr 9, 2008
Posts
25,408
Likes
21,953
Location
The Ponderosa
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Other Teams
Hammers & Steelers
#68
I had a great dad. I grew up on a farm and for my 8th birthday he bought me a Yamaha 50 motorbike and for Xmas a few months later he gave me a rifle. Lol

Any way we spent Boxing day that year on our bikes, carrying our guns and shooting Hares and Foxes. :thumbsu:

Worked every day except Saturdays because he spent the day with the family at the local footy. U17s to seniors every Saturday. Legend.
 
Joined
Dec 9, 2006
Posts
36,463
Likes
60,131
Location
#rentfree in Cats and Magpie supporters heads.
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Aston Villa, Traralgon Tyers United
#69
Any chance George Pell is hiding in the bottom of the bathtub, naked, with his mouth wide open ..?
Ahhhhhh, dude, you’re taking this to a real weird place. Just sayin....


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

LETSGOKANGAS

Norm Smith Medallist
Joined
May 7, 2007
Posts
6,251
Likes
6,194
Location
Plodding through the midfield
AFL Club
North Melbourne
#70
My old man was a postie in the city.

My very first Christmas eve, he was doing his rounds as usual. Everyone was giving him Christmas drinks as he delivered their mail.

He didn’t make it home that day.

No one knew where he was. No calls. Family searching for him all night. Mum breaking down with a new born.
 

OnTheRocks

Club Legend
Joined
Mar 11, 2016
Posts
2,804
Likes
3,561
AFL Club
Hawthorn
#72
My old man was a postie in the city.

My very first Christmas eve, he was doing his rounds as usual. Everyone was giving him Christmas drinks as he delivered their mail.

He didn’t make it home that day.

No one knew where he was. No calls. Family searching for him all night. Mum breaking down with a new born.
I wonder how many brothers and sisters you have? 🤔
 
Top Bottom