Never Fear England cos Dipper's Here

[Dipper]

I'm fully expecting to be called up for the 3rd Test (perhaps even as captain) after my exploits yesterday when I lead my side home with a captain's innings of 24n/o in a tight 15 over a side game.To further bolster my resume I bowled some quick if slightly erratic fast stuff before switching to off spin just as Gary Sobers used to & I managed to run out the star (Australian) batsman in the opposition.(followed by the shout of 'Don't take me on mate!'-hehe)

So if you see a tough looking bloke striding out at Trent bridge without the usual haunted look of a condemned man favoured by most English cricketers & if this bloke stands up to the bully boy Australian fast bowlers & doesn't prod his bat outside off stump to give Mark Waugh fielding practice & if this bloke can actually catch the ball then don't assume that he must have some Australian blood in him think 'Bloody Hell that must be Dipper from BigFooty'-LOL

 

[London Dave]

My lots off to Devon on tour next week Dipper. Perhaps we could use your all round skills to bolster our lot of no hopers. We especially require players who are able to neck copious amounts of amber fluid, whilst still retaining an ability to play top level cricket!

 

[joshhem]

Looking forward to meeting you on telly Dipper.... now that you've lost Thorpe I can just see an ad in the local papers saying

"Cricketers wanted to continue Englands woes"