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Never Married

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craigos said:
I can understand the not having a kid when single but am a little bit concerned about why it wasn't possible to have a dog single.
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Not wasn't possible. Just wouldn't have happened because I wasn't really into taking care of pets.
 
craigos said:
What did you get for less than 10K? Asking for a mate.


I can understand the not having a kid when single but am a little bit concerned about why it wasn't possible to have a dog single.
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a wedding and reception with sit down meal at a place up in the Dandenongs that was our kind of wedding, maybe 40-50 people I forget
 
craigos said:
I do feel for the women because they no doubt cop more pressure to get married and gestate but the reasons why they care about it are for the most part, based on others perceptions.
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Women, unless willing to fork out for IVF, which money aside isn't an enjoyable process, are on a time limit men aren't. A bloke can be mid-40's and still have a decade to hook up with a woman in child rearing age, without then being too old to take part properly in their kids lives. Sure women can have kids post 35, but the odds start dropping markedly. And for them there's no option to grab a guy 10 - 20 years younger to offset that. So women are exposed to that 'You're running out of time' in their late 20's / early 30's, that men can avoid.
 

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craigos said:
Including wedding dress, suit, flowers, photos, celebrant, ring etc?
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I didn't have a photographer because I hate wedding photos, but we had a cocktail party for about 90 people for around 12k, including ceremony and everything.
My wedding dress was about $600, I wore a cream coloured cocktail dress.
 
Andre said:
Women, unless willing to fork out for IVF, which money aside isn't an enjoyable process, are on a time limit men aren't. A bloke can be mid-40's and still have a decade to hook up with a woman in child rearing age, without then being too old to take part properly in their kids lives. Sure women can have kids post 35, but the odds start dropping markedly. And for them there's no option to grab a guy 10 - 20 years younger to offset that. So women are exposed to that 'You're running out of time' in their late 20's / early 30's, that men can avoid.
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True. Very true. It ain't easy. As in have started dating a couple of women recently of my demographic (some who had sworn off kids previously) and the kids issue inevitably curtails it.
 
craigos said:
Including wedding dress, suit, flowers, photos, celebrant, ring etc?
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pretty much yeah, it was 5 years ago though so probably wouldn't come in at that price now
 
Andre said:
Women, unless willing to fork out for IVF, which money aside isn't an enjoyable process, are on a time limit men aren't. A bloke can be mid-40's and still have a decade to hook up with a woman in child rearing age, without then being too old to take part properly in their kids lives. Sure women can have kids post 35, but the odds start dropping markedly. And for them there's no option to grab a guy 10 - 20 years younger to offset that. So women are exposed to that 'You're running out of time' in their late 20's / early 30's, that men can avoid.
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It's the 20-30-40 rule, or 25-35-45.

First women have the power. Then it is in the balance. Then men have the power. Purely based on biology. Men are more fertile post-35 years of age. But it's not just actual fertility, it's the signs of fertility too.

Most single women at 35 are in the dead zone. An equally decent guy who is 35 can pull younger women; older men are either snapped up already, looking for younger women, or not interested in (more) kids. Many at that age are awfully flabby (or overweight) and make excuses for not being toned. Sorry, middle-age fat chicks don't have much pulling power.
 
I'm only in my mid 20s right now so there's tons of water to go under the bridge, but I always said to myself even before I got to my 20s.. when I'm financially stable and happy with who I am in my life then I'll go seek out a real relationship. Hasn't happened yet.. but baby steps.
 
36 and never married and have been single for 11 years

I just don’t trust relationships and you have more to lose than gain imo. If I really want kids I’ll get a surrogate or adoption (lol good luck getting approved as a single male).

Im just happy to **** and forget for now , been burnt too many times in the past to believe that modern relationships can work...let alone marriages
 
Silent Alarm said:
Jeeez what? This is a reference to Scotland saying how you can give off the 'hiding something' vibe if you've never been married, which I disagree with. However never had a serious girlfriend in your life? Unless you're a huge rooter it definitely is going to be a bit weird.

Just because I used the word 'gay' once doesn't mean I'm a homophobe. Ffs this is a footy forum.

Amazing how much you're stung for slightly laying it on homosexuals yet constant racism against Aboriginals is fine on here, issues like climate change and the cost of living and unemployment, all those sort of things are secondary to gay rights. Have gay rights, it's a fantastic thing, but jesus christ the amount of attention it attracts is offensive to things that literally threaten our livelihoods or literal lives. Just an easy social thing to latch onto – bit like how everyone says 'don't kill sharks' and then forgets about all the flora and fauna being decimated elsewhere in Australia...
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Is it ok if I call you an Incel
 
Strange Cat said:
36 and never married and have been single for 11 years

I just don’t trust relationships and you have more to lose than gain imo. If I really want kids I’ll get a surrogate or adoption (lol good luck getting approved as a single male).

Im just happy to **** and forget for now , been burnt too many times in the past to believe that modern relationships can work...let alone marriages
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I knew a guy who had the same thoughts. Self made man and worried a woman was only ever after his money. Gets a prostitute every now and then for the relief.

Not for me but it worked ok for him. Though I'd hate to be that paranoid
 

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GreyCrow said:
I knew a guy who had the same thoughts. Self made man and worried a woman was only ever after his money. Gets a prostitute every now and then for the relief.

Not for me but it worked ok for him. Though I'd hate to be that paranoid
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It’s not so much about the money it’s more about the emotional time and effort put into making a relationship work only for it to be pissed away and seeing your kids every 2nd weekend and starting from scratch again at a age where you can’t really meet anyone and you are in a worse position financially as well
 
Strange Cat said:
It’s not so much about the money it’s more about the emotional time and effort put into making a relationship work only for it to be pissed away and seeing your kids every 2nd weekend and starting from scratch again at a age where you can’t really meet anyone and you are in a worse position financially as well
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I am at that point now but I dont regret a thing
 
craigos said:
It's just the societal pressure from others that force a lot of people into marriage. "Oh, you've been with your boyfriend 5 years and you're still not married? Does he even love you?" Then the females get all jealous because their friend who has been together half as long is now engaged, it just makes no sense to me.
As someone that is in a long term relationship the pressure from other couples to get married is ridiculous. If you're the type of person who is constantly saying "you guys are next" to your friends then you probably need to be told you're a campaigner. Same goes with having children, jesus, does my head in.
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My nan was an old school Christian who got married at 21-22 and had kids when she was 22.

She put heaps of pressure on my dad and mum to get married and have kids as 4 of his 5 older siblings were getting married and having famlies at a much younger age than him. I only have one cousin who is younger than me on the paternal side of the family for example.

He got married and me and my brothers were born from when he was 31-38, but by his mid 40s he was divorced and depressed and took him a while to break out of his rut.

Having seen my parents separate by the time I started high school and myself breaking up a long term relationship a couple of years ago, I think If people decide to settle down and have families it's gotta be for the right reasons imo and for themselves to be a family, can't just be to appease others.
 
I've been with my partner almost five years, which seems to be a fair while for people our age (18 & 20 when we got together). We like having our own time to ourselves so it's not like I'm losing my freedom or anything. If I want to go out with mates I do that, if I want to go watch some sport I'll do that. It's not like she's stopping me from doing anything. Her biggest downfall is the burden that is her mother.
 
I think I always wanted to be married and to have kids. Got married fairly young at 26 and it's our 12th anniversary next week. Don't regret a thing. The relationship changes and evolves but that's ok because so do you. We're probably getting through the most stressful stage of young kids (3 and 5). Really looking forward to their school years and when things are a bit more settled.
 

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Strange Cat said:
36 and never married and have been single for 11 years

I just don’t trust relationships and you have more to lose than gain imo. If I really want kids I’ll get a surrogate or adoption (lol good luck getting approved as a single male).
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Don't be that desperate..
 
GreyCrow said:
I knew a guy who had the same thoughts. Self made man and worried a woman was only ever after his money. Gets a prostitute every now and then for the relief.

Not for me but it worked ok for him. Though I'd hate to be that paranoid
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Friend of mine was so concerned about his money he had the snip in his 20s. Had to find a doctor willing to do it because he was so young.
 
Catfish Alley said:
How does that even work in modern life? Most women work and have their own stuff. And if you’re married for a while you have both contributed.
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You guess that speaks more of the person than anything else.
 

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