Preview Showdown 50- Why I Hate The Crows

[crazybunta]

Serioulsy, fu** the AFL….and the club for turning over…and definitely fu** Eddie the twerp

So PAFC have an agreement to wear the prison bars whenever there is a heritage round, but AFL have decided to change the name from heritage round to retro round and somehow the deal no longer applies?

 

[glitch01]

Some interesting perspectives regarding this game and selections.
Very confident we'll win comfortably by 4 or 5 goals however like most years we see the usual comments:

We need to smash them to boost percentage
Should rest player X
Should try player Y as it's an easy game.

I think we all know that we don't "smash" oppositions, haven't done for a long while.
Hinkley has never "rested" of "managed" players. Almost without fail they go with the perceived strongest available team
We don't "try" players in matches like this. Our ruckman was out for 4 weeks and even then we didn't try a replacement.

Happy to be proven wrong and would love to see a big win but I just don't see it happening.

Someone once said "those with low expectations are seldom disappointed"

 

[Duckimus Prime]

So PAFC have an agreement to wear the prison bars whenever there is a heritage round, but AFL have decided to change the name from heritage round to retro round and somehow the deal no longer applies?

Retro Round was a Foxtel thing, not an AFL thing.

Fremantle was literally the only club that rolled out a 90s jumper for it.
Sydney has decided to wear the heritage Bloods top for all away games in Melbourne.

 

[chiwigi]

Retro Round was a Foxtel thing, not an AFL thing.

Fremantle was literally the only club that rolled out a 90s jumper for it.
Sydney has decided to wear the heritage Bloods top for all away games in Melbourne.

It was an AFL thing, dressed as a Fox Footy thing.

 

[backtozero]

It was an AFL thing, dressed as a Fox Footy thing.

So apart from Freo wearing an old jumper and the Bounce guys wearing silly wigs, what was retro about it?

 

[StueyDaDew]

I hate the Crows. I mean, I really hate the Crows.

I left my first wife because she barracked for the Crows (they didn't exist - they weren't even a diseased sperm in Max Basheer's left nut- when I married her). I am more likely to support ISIS's efforts to decapitate 100 innocent children than support the Crow's winning anything- other than another glorious wooden spoon.

It's not so much their players. It's hard to dislike a bunch of inept, pea-hearted and semi-skilled "has beens" and "never will bees" who have brought unprecedented shame to their silly fruit tingle jumper. I've even warmed to their management who somehow transformed their team from Premiership favourites on Grand Final Day 2017 to laughing stock of the AFL in record time by stripping them naked, putting bags on their heads, tying them to poles and racially vilifying them for a week in the name of team bonding.

I know what they were trying to do. By humiliating them to the point of total despair they were hoping that putting on that embarrassing jumper and having to occasionally sing that annoying bloody team song wouldn't seem so bad. It failed worse than Hitler's parish priest.

No, it's their supporters I reserve my utmost contempt for. Never in human history has a group gathered together, with the aim of supporting a team, with less idea about the sport they are supposed to be playing than the "19th Moron". The rules of the game are a complete mystery to that lot. Try talking to one of these masterminds about the tactics involved in AFL footy and- if you still have the will to live afterwards- it is the only conversation you can have with another human in which you know less afterwards than before.

All stereotypes aside, they are mostly a bunch of ageing, women, theatre goers and arrogant, self-opiniated, but invariably wrong, male dickheads who live to take every opportunity to smuggly rub it in whenever the Rories have a win over Port or other success for months, even years after. I still get asked if I would like to watch their Grand Final wins with them- to which I always respond- "Is it on VHS or Beta".

That is why we cannot lose this game. We have a real chance to make the top 4 and, if we can get some momentum over the next 2 months, to win our second AFL flag. Not only will an upset destroy that, but they will take credit for derailing our season and we won't hear the end of it for years.

To the game.

We have a stronger, faster, more skilled and more experienced team with greater incentive to win. They are missing some key spuds like Rory Brown, Rory Talia and Rory Mileria. Rory Crouch might play (he is no longer on their injury list) but he probably won't. Rory Crouch is a free agent this year and destined to join his brother Rory at St Kilda or another Vic club and is showing little interest in playing. It could only remind potential suitors what a slow, "kick and hope" hack he is.

We are likely to go in unchanged despite the fact that we are no longer playing indoors and the conditions (a dewy evening) will not suit our giant forward line. This will be risky. However, I can't see Ken dropping Marshall and Georgiades and Ladhams deserve to keep their spot. Robbie is not ready yet and the only small forward option in the shed is Woodcock. Ken may be tempted to rest Charlie- but there is a bye in 3 weeks and percentage over Sydney (who play North and Gold Coast in their last 2 games) may yet be a factor affecting our top 4 hopes.

A key will be how well this giant forward line can hold their marks and hold the ball in when they don't mark it.

The Cows have the same problem at the other end. Last week they played R.Walker, R.Himmleberg, R.Lynch and R.Fogarty and they have R.Thilthorpe (who has been "rested" for 3 weeks now) to come in. We don't need to panic and rush in more tall defenders- Burton, McKenzie, Aliir and Jonas can all bring the ball to ground and the first 3 will destroy their talls when the ball is on the ground.

We could be tempted to include Clurey on the back of his efforts in Showdown 49. That day he made R.Walker look like a fat, slow, 31 year old, one trick pony who was more concerned about carefully balancing a slug between his upper lip and nose than getting the footy....wait.... but our incumbent defenders are quite capable also.

Matching their best 5 players against ours demonstrates our superiority:

Wines, Dixon, Boak, Butters, Amon vs R.Laird, R.Walker, R.Sloane, R.Smith, R.Dodo- their 5 will be their keys to winning Slowdown 2022.

Matching their worst 5 against our players 18-22, proves the same point:

Marshall, Bonner, Bergman, Powell-Pepper, Byrne-Jones (on form) vs R.McPherson, R.Jones, R. McHenry, R.Rowe, R.Murray- seriously, there hasn't been a worse looking collection of spuds since the Potato Famine.

We should not lose, we must not lose but it is a Showdown and it is their Grand Final. Therefore, we must:

- start strongly and not give them an early sniff
- win the contested ball
- be composed entering the F50

Port by 40.

 

[Enviable Tradition]

I hate the Crows. I mean, I really hate the Crows.

I left my first wife because she barracked for the Crows (they didn't exist - they weren't even a diseased sperm in Max Basheer's left nut- when I married her). I am more likely to support ISIS's efforts to decapitate 100 innocent children than support the Crow's winning anything- other than another glorious wooden spoon.

It's not so much their players. It's hard to dislike a bunch of inept, pea-hearted and semi-skilled "has beens" and "never will bees" who have brought unprecedented shame to their silly fruit tingle jumper. I've even warmed to their management who somehow transformed their team from Premiership favourites on Grand Final Day 2017 to laughing stock of the AFL in record time by stripping them naked, putting bags on their heads, tying them to poles and racially vilifying them for a week in the name of team bonding.

I know what they were trying to do. By humiliating them to the point of total despair they were hoping that putting on that embarrassing jumper and having to occasionally sing that annoying bloody team song wouldn't seem so bad. It failed worse than Hitler's parish priest.

No, it's their supporters I reserve my utmost contempt for. Never in human history has a group gathered together, with the aim of supporting a team, with less idea about the sport they are supposed to be playing than the "19th Moron". The rules of the game are a complete mystery to that lot. Try talking to one of these masterminds about the tactics involved in AFL footy and- if you still have the will to live afterwards- it is the only conversation you can have with another human in which you know less afterwards than before.

All stereotypes aside, they are mostly a bunch of ageing, women, theatre goers and arrogant, self-opiniated, but invariably wrong, male dickheads who live to take every opportunity to smuggly rub it in whenever the Rories have a win over Port or other success for months, even years after. I still get asked if I would like to watch their Grand Final wins with them- to which I always respond- "Is it on VHS or Beta".

That is why we cannot lose this game. We have a real chance to make the top 4 and, if we can get some momentum over the next 2 months, to win our second AFL flag. Not only will an upset destroy that, but they will take credit for derailing our season and we won't hear the end of it for years.

To the game.

We have a stronger, faster, more skilled and more experienced team with greater incentive to win. They are missing some key spuds like Rory Brown, Rory Talia and Rory Mileria. Rory Crouch might play (he is no longer on their injury list) but he probably won't. Rory Crouch is a free agent this year and destined to join his brother Rory at St Kilda or another Vic club and is showing little interest in playing. It could only remind potential suitors what a slow, "kick and hope" hack he is.

We are likely to go in unchanged despite the fact that we are no longer playing indoors and the conditions (a dewy evening) will not suit our giant forward line. This will be risky. However, I can't see Ken dropping Marshall and Georgiades and Ladhams deserve to keep their spot. Robbie is not ready yet and the only small forward option in the shed is Woodcock. Ken may be tempted to rest Charlie- but there is a bye in 3 weeks and percentage over Sydney (who play North and Gold Coast in their last 2 games) may yet be a factor affecting our top 4 hopes.

A key will be how well this giant forward line can hold their marks and hold the ball in when they don't mark it.

The Cows have the same problem at the other end. Last week they played R.Walker, R.Himmleberg, R.Lynch and R.Fogarty and they have R.Thilthorpe (who has been "rested" for 3 weeks now) to come in. We don't need to panic and rush in more tall defenders- Burton, McKenzie, Aliir and Jonas can all bring the ball to ground and the first 3 will destroy their talls when the ball is on the ground.

We could be tempted to include Clurey on the back of his efforts in Showdown 49. That day he made R.Walker look like a fat, slow, 31 year old, one trick pony who was more concerned about carefully balancing a slug between his upper lip and nose than getting the footy....wait.... but our incumbent defenders are quite capable also.

Matching their best 5 players against ours demonstrates our superiority:

Wines, Dixon, Boak, Butters, Amon vs R.Laird, R.Walker, R.Sloane, R.Smith, R.Dodo- their 5 will be their keys to winning Slowdown 2022.

Matching their worst 5 against our players 18-22, proves the same point:

Marshall, Bonner, Bergman, Powell-Pepper, Byrne-Jones (on form) vs R.McPherson, R.Jones, R. McHenry, R.Rowe, R.Murray- seriously, there hasn't been a worse looking collection of spuds since the Potato Famine.

We should not lose, we must not lose but it is a Showdown and it is their Grand Final. Therefore, we must:

- start strongly and not give them an early sniff
- win the contested ball
- be composed entering the F50

Port by 40.

Meh.

Bank the 4 points.

Try and gain some percentage.

Move on to bigger things.

On SM-G975F using BigFooty.com mobile app

 

[Magpiespowaz]

Keep winning, keep building towards September, keep fighting for the Prison Bars farken...

 

[Grave Danger]

I hate the Crows. I mean, I really hate the Crows.

Those bastards stole our place in the AFL.

 

[PowerBaz]

Those bastards stole our place in the AFL.

We created their place….

 

[philreich]

I don't care about the Crows getting Horne or any other talented youngster - a Port win on Saturday night keeps the back to back spoons dream alive, which would continue to haunt the club for years to come. Just bury them boys!!!!

 

[Janus]

This scene sums up my thoughts on Port vs Adelaide:



On one hand you’ve got the loser who validates himself by comparing his success to someone else…while on the other you’ve got Port’s Don Draper who doesn’t give a shit because we’ve got more important things to do.

We’re going to smash the shit out of these clowns not because of any sense of animosity, but because if we have any aspirations of winning the flag we should be treating them like the snarky Protozoa they are.

 

[OneGreatClub]

 

[EskimoPAFC]

Win and wear the bars after the game again. Do it every single time. **** them.

 

[VineValerian]

Some interesting perspectives regarding this game and selections.
Very confident we'll win comfortably by 4 or 5 goals however like most years we see the usual comments:

We need to smash them to boost percentage
Should rest player X
Should try player Y as it's an easy game.

I think we all know that we don't "smash" oppositions, haven't done for a long while.
Hinkley has never "rested" of "managed" players. Almost without fail they go with the perceived strongest available team
We don't "try" players in matches like this. Our ruckman was out for 4 weeks and even then we didn't try a replacement.

Happy to be proven wrong and would love to see a big win but I just don't see it happening.

Someone once said "those with low expectations are seldom disappointed"

"Smash" doesn't exist in Port's vocabulary.

 

[John the Butcher]

Didn't we have to give those f***ers an allowance first showdown last year?

Also 15,000. C'mon man...

 

[Greasyrhys]

At least playing in front of 15k (mostly croms fans) will be less daunting than 40k or their customers

 

[OneGreatClub]

At least playing in front of 15k (mostly croms fans) will be less daunting than 40k or their customers

You will be able to hear a knitting needle drop

 

[Festerz]

Didn't we have to give those f***ers an allowance first showdown last year?

IIRC. There were 2000 fans allowed at Port's covid Showdown last year. (plus 240 corporates).

Of those 2000 tickets, PAFC allocated 1475 to Port members and a generous 475 to the crows. So about a 75%/25% split. (50 went to Adelaide Oval members).

I also remember Port being heavily criticised in the media for not giving half of their allocated tickets to the crows.

Let's see how West Lakes does it. (and how the media reports it)

 

[Nelso]

12000 to Crow supporters and 3000 to corporates according to Channel Nine.

 

[PowerBaz]

Marvel no one, probably similar to 10k Crows supporters.

 

[Fizzler]

Can not begin to express the amount of disdain I have for this franchise, and I don't even have to share a state with them.
Ports by 65, anything less is a failure.

 

[Fizzler]

Lol what the ****, no tickets allocated to Port members??? I wanna say I'm shocked but this is so typical of this pissant excuse of a football "club". Said it before and I'll say it again, the Crows' aim for everything is to hurt Port first and succeed second. What more can you expect from the "club" formed as a knee-jerk reaction to the two sides who actually had any foresight at all. In an ideal world we'd be playing this week against that other side that had foresight but instead they squibbed it and we are left to compete against this pissant "club". The fact that the club is only pushing to wear the bars against Adelaide is disappointing as it implies that the Crows are important enough to share a football field with the side wearing it. I said Ports by 165 but after this ticket fiasco I'm tipping us by 165. 15000 in the ground at the start and midway through the last quarter we should have hopefully crushed the will of any Crows supporting campaigner in the stadium to the point what only 1500 of em are left.

 

[bomberclifford]

Let’s fcuk this pissant club up. Smash them hard.

Port by 100pts

 

[Enviable Tradition]

I can't wait for CDs acidic response.

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