Media - Sim Is Broke | BigFooty

Media Sim Is Broke

Discussion in 'The Sweet F.A. (SFA) - Fantasy Footy League' started by JT_the_Man, Jun 3, 2018.

  1. JT_the_Man

    JT_the_Man Norm Smith Medallist

    Essendon
    Joined:
    Dec 14
    Posts:
    8,986
    Location:
    Wonders
    Other Teams:
    LCFC, LAL, Stars, 49ers, Canadiens
    DEAR MEMBERS OF THE SFA AND QOOTBALL LOVERS EVERYWHERE,

    Today, the Wonders lost to the Swamprats in the Second Semi-Final by shit tons. This marked a straight sets exit for a generally outstanding Wonders unit, who happened to choke on the main stage...

    But it didn’t have to be this way.

    We go back to Round 16 of the 25th season in the SFA, where we see an anomaly.

    A game winner. Kicked by superstar Wonder OutofTownCrow.

    Except it never counted.

    What did the Wonders do to anger the qootball gods in round 16? Why now? Why at finals time? Why, with a minor premiership on the line?

    Why did the sim have to leave us hanging?

    Well, you’ll be pleased to know that I, in fact, DO NOT have an answer for this. None. But what I do know is - I’m going to find out.

    SO THIS MESSAGE IS ADDRESSED TO BOTH THE SIM AND THE QOOTBALL GODS...

    I will find you. And I will do whatever it takes to correct you for Season 26... No matter how far I have to travel... I will learn of the cause of this injustice. And I will bring you to justice.
     

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  2. JT_the_Man

    JT_the_Man Norm Smith Medallist

    Essendon
    Joined:
    Dec 14
    Posts:
    8,986
    Location:
    Wonders
    Other Teams:
    LCFC, LAL, Stars, 49ers, Canadiens
    CHAPTER 1

    I was tired. Sick and tired of the false hope I’d been receiving since the glamour and glory of the S21 premiership medal being placed around my neck. As I roamed the streets of the West Coast, I was formulating a plan. A plan to bring an end to this false hope. A plan to make the sim my bitch.

    As I wandered by the JT_the_Man Tennis Academy for young Wonders stars looking to try their hand at another sport that I dominate I noticed something new. Something different. A building that was not there before.

    “@SarahSmiles Homework Club”

    I wandered inside to see what was going on, but what I saw was not what I expected. No, there were no children doing homework. Just SarahSmiles scribbling random shit on a blackboard rambling incoherently to himself.

    “Jubiddy jabada ramisbidy al kateke”

    I wandered up behind him and looked at the board. Numbers. Letters. Everywhere.

    “What is this?” I said.

    “RABADA!” SarahSmiles turned around to me, startled and alert.

    “What are you saying.”

    “Must protect the secret of the qootball gods...” SarahSmiles said,

    “Huh?”

    “LEAVE!” he said,

    “Are you okay?”

    “gah rabada ATTACK.”

    SarahSmiles charged straight at me. I rushed to the exit, and upon exiting, noticed that SarahSmiles Homework Club was no more... In its place I saw a passed out SarahSmiles, lying on the sidewalk.

    I was confused at what I had just witnessed. Unsure of how to react. But one thing was for sure - something big was happening.
     
    Elton Johns Wig, BLERN and U2tigers like this.
  3. The Filth Wizard

    The Filth Wizard Happy Dude

    North Melbourne
    Joined:
    Jul 07
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    56,717
    Location:
    East Side
    Other Teams:
    Arsenal, East Side Hawks
    Hot dogs. Get ya hot dogs here.
     
  4. U2tigers

    U2tigers Brownlow Medallist

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Nov 06
    Posts:
    11,543
    Location:
    Brisbane
    Other Teams:
    Mizzou, Wonders and Team SANSA
    Good luck with your mission.

    I however am already on my way up to Mt Buller to catch as many STD's as I can off some of those Feral Snow Bunnies.
     
  5. 3121 premiers

    3121 premiers fumbler

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Jun 12
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    27,188
    Location:
    In a Cup
    How dare you steal TheMidRunner s fame.
     
    TheMidRunner, TJASTA and rfctiger74 like this.
  6. BLERN

    BLERN Voted 2nd best BLERN on regularsizedfooty

    North Melbourne
    Joined:
    Oct 16
    Posts:
    7,578
    Got any popcorn?

    I got given front row seats before i realised what the show was.

    Actually got any scotch?
     
    GotTheGoodes and I Dont Care like this.
  7. Firestarter

    Firestarter Premium Platinum

    North Melbourne
    Joined:
    Feb 16
    Posts:
    18,848
    Or some sleeping pills.
     
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  8. JT_the_Man

    JT_the_Man Norm Smith Medallist

    Essendon
    Joined:
    Dec 14
    Posts:
    8,986
    Location:
    Wonders
    Other Teams:
    LCFC, LAL, Stars, 49ers, Canadiens
    Basically this is me begging for the next chapter of Escape from Dragon Island.
     
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  9. 3121 premiers

    3121 premiers fumbler

    Richmond
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    27,188
    Location:
    In a Cup
    This thread is turning out to be more important than that self tugging Hawks HoF thread.
     
    TJASTA and rfctiger74 like this.
  10. BLERN

    BLERN Voted 2nd best BLERN on regularsizedfooty

    North Melbourne
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    Haha.

    I do intend to finish that. I have 3 days of work left this week and then im unemployed by choice
     
  11. 3121 premiers

    3121 premiers fumbler

    Richmond
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    27,188
    Location:
    In a Cup
    I'll see you at Centrelink on Thursday.
     
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  12. Yakker

    Yakker Fisherman

    Melbourne
    Joined:
    Apr 16
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    8,547
    Location:
    -23.903529, 152.398097
    Other Teams:
    Mt Buller Demons
    No one is really surprised to be honest
     
  13. BLERN

    BLERN Voted 2nd best BLERN on regularsizedfooty

    North Melbourne
    Joined:
    Oct 16
    Posts:
    7,578
    Centerlink hate me. I have applied twice over my working life for benifits i was entitled too. But got refused because i wasnt willing to BS and lie in order to get the payments.

    Maybe ill go and offer to write them half of a story.
     
    3121 premiers likes this.
  14. 3121 premiers

    3121 premiers fumbler

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Jun 12
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    27,188
    Location:
    In a Cup
    Why aren't you being inducted in that Hawfs tugger thread bloke?
     
  15. JT_the_Man

    JT_the_Man Norm Smith Medallist

    Essendon
    Joined:
    Dec 14
    Posts:
    8,986
    Location:
    Wonders
    Other Teams:
    LCFC, LAL, Stars, 49ers, Canadiens
    CHAPTER 2

    It was a windy day on the East Side of town. A humble man by the name of NinjaSwan approached his captain, Loonerty. As Loonerty was busy attending to his Survivor game over on Dragon Island, this would be one of the few times NinjaSwan would be able to see him.

    “My captain.”

    “Huh? What? Oh. Can’t you see I’m busy making a crossword for my next survivor challenge? Now that BRAB has been voted out I need to breathe some new life into this game.”

    “It’s the sim.”

    “What about the sim?”

    “It... Broke.”

    “What do you mean, broke?”

    “We just received word from Cloud_ that the sim has gone rogue, and is going after members of the Wonders. The West Coast will have no sane players remaining on their roster by the weeks end if this keeps up...”

    “Well, isn’t that a good thing? I could live without their ramblings of #firsttosix every five minutes.”

    “I suppose... But what if we are next?”

    “Don’t you worry, I will handle this. The sim would never attack a team on the East Side.”

    “If you say so...”

    As Ninja departed the room, The Filth Wizard came barging into Loonerty’s office.

    “The plan is in motion.” Is all that he said...
     
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  16. TJASTA

    TJASTA Qooty stats groupie

    Richmond
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    Jack Graham
    Other Teams:
    Port Melbourne, Furies, Bolts
  17. SarahSmiles

    SarahSmiles SarahFrowns

    Hawthorn
    Joined:
    Oct 17
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    8,636
    Location:
    A place where you used to live when you were young
    Other Teams:
    Swamprats, Chelsea, Victory, Gades
    This must have been the night when TJASTA spiked my kombucha
     
    JT_the_Man likes this.
  18. TJASTA

    TJASTA Qooty stats groupie

    Richmond
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    Jack Graham
    Other Teams:
    Port Melbourne, Furies, Bolts
    SarahSmiles likes this.
  19. fitzroybowiedog

    fitzroybowiedog Major Tom, The Junkie.

    Western Bulldogs
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    20,730
    Location:
    New Jak City
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    Fitzroy FC Chelsea Oilers Roys FFC
  20. sante

    sante Emu is life

    Richmond
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    41,956
    Location:
    RFC
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    Portland Trailblazers
    TJASTA likes this.
  21. rfctiger74

    rfctiger74 Premium Platinum

    Richmond
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    Aug 09
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    40,129
    Other Teams:
    76'ers
    Wonders would have one if the game was played at kardinia park
     
    TJASTA, Cactus_ and KohPhi like this.
  22. okeydoke7

    okeydoke7 Brownlow Medallist

    St Kilda
    Joined:
    Jun 07
    Posts:
    12,770
    The Wonders and the Bombers lost in the same week.

    Can I officially join the Wonders now?
     
    SarahSmiles, U2tigers and JT_the_Man like this.
  23. U2tigers

    U2tigers Brownlow Medallist

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Nov 06
    Posts:
    11,543
    Location:
    Brisbane
    Other Teams:
    Mizzou, Wonders and Team SANSA
    If you promise to post more then 50 times in match threads a season.

    Welcome to the Wonders
     
    SarahSmiles likes this.
  24. Cactus_

    Cactus_ The piano has been drinking

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Feb 17
    Posts:
    4,628
    Location:
    Melbourne, Inner Western Suburbs
    Surprised there has it been more attention given to this very important and disgraceful situation.
     
    SarahSmiles, JT_the_Man and U2tigers like this.
  25. Wacky Tiger

    Wacky Tiger Moderator

    Richmond
    Joined:
    Aug 04
    Posts:
    24,275
    Location:
    Country SA
    Other Teams:
    Fighting Furies, Sturt, Rockets
    Has a tinge of a Fire Sale smell to it
     
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