Song Contest Part XV, Host: The Filth Wizard, Theme: 7, Votes Due: Sunday, 9:30pm AEST

NaturalDisaster

Spec Moderator
Jul 16, 2015
44,775
59,573
Earth somewhere
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
East Side Hawks
Oh god. There are some songs you shouldn't listen to whilst you're at work, and this is one of them (I always have the memory of the wholesome video clip in my mind when I listen).


I blame you for this one, roo2macca. Pretty sure you nommed it in my Italy round, I regret not voting for you!
Pretty sure I nommed that one.
 

(Log in to remove this ad.)

roo2macca

Hall of Famer
Jan 18, 2009
33,591
37,431
Warehouse
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
Chelsea, Sturt
Oh god. There are some songs you shouldn't listen to whilst you're at work, and this is one of them (I always have the memory of the wholesome video clip in my mind when I listen).


I blame you for this one, roo2macca. Pretty sure you nommed it in my Italy round, I regret not voting for you!
Pretty sure I nommed that one.
It was me, you must have nommed another WoD song. Great song but I felt it was wasted in the Italy round.
 

NaturalDisaster

Spec Moderator
Jul 16, 2015
44,775
59,573
Earth somewhere
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
East Side Hawks
It was me, you must have nommed another WoD song. Great song but I felt it was wasted in the Italy round.
I remember now.

I nommed this one round:


Got >20 votes so did well, but I’m sus it was down voted did to the song length, should have won.

Short attention spanned campaigners
 

raskolnikov

Premium Gold
Apr 1, 2002
27,258
18,795
Central Queensland
AFL Club
Essendon
Other Teams
Lions
I memorised the poem from the book for a school recital when I was 12 and can still recite it.

Dear friends, we surely all agree
There's almost nothing worse to see
Than some repulsive little bum
Who's always chewing chewing gum.
(It's very near as bad as those
Who sit around and pick the nose).
So please believe us when we say
That chewing gum will never pay;
This sticky habit's bound to send
The chewer to a sticky end.
Did any of you ever know
A person called Miss Bigelow?
This dreadful woman saw no wrong
In chewing, chewing all day long.
She chewed while bathing in the tub,
She chewed while dancing at her club,
She chewed in church and on the bus;
It really was quite ludicrous!
And when she couldn't find her gum,
She'd chew up the linoleum,
Or anything that happened near–
A pair of boots, the postman's ear,
Or other people's underclothes,
And once she chewed her boy friend's nose.
She went on chewing till, at last,
Her chewing muscles grew so vast
That from her face her giant chin
Stuck out just like a violin.
For years and years she chewed away,
Consuming fifty packs a day,
Until one summer's eve, alas,
A horrid business came to pass.
Miss Bigelow went late to bed,
For half an hour she lay and read,
Chewing and chewing all the while
Like some great clockwork crocodile.
At last, she put her gum away
Upon a special little tray,
And settled back and went to sleep–
(She managed this by counting sheep).
But now, how strange! Although she slept,
Those massive jaws of hers still kept
On chewing, chewing through the night,
Even with nothing there to bite.
They were, you see, in such a groove
They positively had to move.
And very grim it was to hear
In pitchy darkness, loud and clear,
This sleeping woman's great big trap
Opening and shutting, snap–snap–snap!
Faster and faster, chop–chop–chop,
The noise went on, it wouldn't stop.
Until at last her jaws decide
To pause and open extra wide,
And with the most tremendous chew
They bit the lady's tongue in two.
Thereafter, just from chewing gum,
Miss Bigelow was always dumb,
And spent her life shut up in some
Disgusting sanatorium.
And that is why we'll try so hard
To save Miss Violet Beauregard
From suffering an equal fate.
She's still quite young. It's not too late,
Provided she survives the cure.
We hope she does. We can't be sure
 

(Log in to remove this ad.)

Top Bottom