Where's the picture of the, "Sniff My Chair" truck when you need it?
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Society & Culture Strange people you have worked with
- Thread starter yarran13
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Where's the picture of the, "Sniff My Chair" truck when you need it?
- Aug 21, 2011
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Working at Coles, you work with many who are strange:
We have Artif; the crazy French/Arab guy in his mid 40's who skips around the store and wears a leather glove half the time. Incredibly nice man, just not all there.
Then we have the security guard from the Sub-Continent. Every time India are involved in an international cricket match, he must give me a full run down report of the scorecard and all that happened. Once he's done doing that, he must tell me of the "sweet bang-bang" he made with his girlfriend either in the back of his Commodore or in his house in Sunshine.
DO WE STOP THERE? Not at all.
Joe: My new manager as of 3 days ago. Believes the sinking of the Costa Concordia is an international conspiracy which involves the Russians and the removal of Berlusconi. Impossible to understand the man. Once ordered when left in charge of the Fresh Produce section: 86 CRATES OF 1KG CARROTS. 86 CRATES!?!!?!!
I walked in one morning and just the Wailing Wall of Carrots sits before me.
Believes the bosses' are out to get him because they can't handle someone who tells the 'truth'.
Complete nutter.
We have Artif; the crazy French/Arab guy in his mid 40's who skips around the store and wears a leather glove half the time. Incredibly nice man, just not all there.
Then we have the security guard from the Sub-Continent. Every time India are involved in an international cricket match, he must give me a full run down report of the scorecard and all that happened. Once he's done doing that, he must tell me of the "sweet bang-bang" he made with his girlfriend either in the back of his Commodore or in his house in Sunshine.
DO WE STOP THERE? Not at all.
Joe: My new manager as of 3 days ago. Believes the sinking of the Costa Concordia is an international conspiracy which involves the Russians and the removal of Berlusconi. Impossible to understand the man. Once ordered when left in charge of the Fresh Produce section: 86 CRATES OF 1KG CARROTS. 86 CRATES!?!!?!!
I walked in one morning and just the Wailing Wall of Carrots sits before me.
Believes the bosses' are out to get him because they can't handle someone who tells the 'truth'.
Complete nutter.
SugarShane
C12 H22 O11
Reading a few of these have reminded me of a few others.
One of the grocery managers from when i was back doing nightfill has absolutely no life at all outside of Woolies. He's been working there ever since he left school, and still is in his early 40's. He refuses to take annual leave because he has nothing to do outside work, at one point they just about forced him to take it because he had about 6 month's worth owing. You could never talk to him about anything because he wasn't familiar with it, and every conversation would quickly twist back to Woolies related things. The only thing other than Woolies that he'd ever talk about was the time he got abducted by aliens. Yep.
Another place i worked at i was often left alone by the manager. He kept all our pricelists on his machine and one day when i was by myself i had to find one. So into his office i went, and opened up his computer. Not remember where he kept them, i opened My Documents, and then the Company folder. In there he had a folder named Boss's Name's Stuff. Opened that and it was full of shemale pr0n. Very odd.
One of the grocery managers from when i was back doing nightfill has absolutely no life at all outside of Woolies. He's been working there ever since he left school, and still is in his early 40's. He refuses to take annual leave because he has nothing to do outside work, at one point they just about forced him to take it because he had about 6 month's worth owing. You could never talk to him about anything because he wasn't familiar with it, and every conversation would quickly twist back to Woolies related things. The only thing other than Woolies that he'd ever talk about was the time he got abducted by aliens. Yep.
Another place i worked at i was often left alone by the manager. He kept all our pricelists on his machine and one day when i was by myself i had to find one. So into his office i went, and opened up his computer. Not remember where he kept them, i opened My Documents, and then the Company folder. In there he had a folder named Boss's Name's Stuff. Opened that and it was full of shemale pr0n. Very odd.
- Aug 21, 2011
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- May 10, 2004
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I'm the strange guy where I work.
- Jun 21, 2009
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I work with part time taxi drivers and 7/11 moonlighters. Might as well work alone
- Apr 4, 2009
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She was smoking hot season 5/6
Mustafa1982
Rookie
- Apr 26, 2012
- 26
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- Adelaide
I worked with many Chinas.
Most of them have strange behaviors
One of them puts cold 'tang juice' in microwave oven!! and then drink it
Most of them have strange behaviors
One of them puts cold 'tang juice' in microwave oven!! and then drink it
- Banned
- #110
I work with a 50 year old man that acts like a teenager its rather embarrassing.. He constantly talks about stupid stuff..He seems to be a bit of a pedophile he tends to talk about wanting to have sex with young girls.. i am thinking of reporting him to the cops.
BarkingMad
Draftee
Well there goes an hour of my work time reading this thread, much love to all that posted to allow me such a break 
moncon
Benchwarmer
We had a guy come in for a four-week contract, accountant in a suit, outwardly a boring number cruncher, mid-30s, then for the first time ever the cleaners made a formal complaint about the state of the men's toilets, someone was crapping every evening all around the bowl but not in it. Then one of my team approached me to complain that this guy kept farting during meetings, and acting as if nothing happened. He lost his security badge and started weeping in front of me when he told me, and then when his contract was up it turned out he had somehow burned the curtains and the carpet in the apartment where he was staying. Really weird.
- Jun 12, 2010
- 365
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- Banned
- #114
What so strange about that, he said he kind of told you in his way he does not like men touching him. It true many guys do not like guys touching them. There a chance also he think the way you guys act is gay.I work with a guy that hates being touched in any way. Not so long ago another workmate scruffed his hair up as boys do.
This fella grabbed him by the scruff of the neck, picked him up and threw him on the ground like WWF on Fox. Luckily there was no bosses around to witness him losing his s**t. That was the day we realised he doesnt like being touched lol
Blokes who get overly shitty when touched by another are always closet homos.
Not that theres anything wrong with that.
I have my personal space, if it gets invaded (man or woman)..... look out!
Big Jono
Team Captain
Wait, i was talking about season 1........ lol just kidding.
In the opening sequence from the first episode of one season (think it must be 6) she is dancing in lingerie for her boyfriend. Freaking HOT!
Uncle_Leo
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I work in a very strange office.
I am the only male (this is not as good as it sounds) and there are only 4 of us under 40 of the 11 in the office.
The receptionist is related to the state manager and is close to retirement age but recently got remarried and has a giant mortgage. She is deaf, literally deaf but will never lose her job due to her relation being in charge. She says she can't afford a hearing aid but then went and bought an iPhone out right.
We then have the "person" I sit next to who one day will be your best friend and the next day refuse to speak to you but will listen to every conversation you have with other people. This conversations sometimes get reported back to management. Since I found this out I now only talk to anyone about work. Open plan offices kill me.
We then have my direct manager and the operations manager. It's the best puppet show I have ever seen. My direct manager is in the operations managers office at least 6 hours of the day. They have offices of course, not like us plebs.
But then we have the operations managers pet who is supposed to be a pleb but has her own office. She is a part timer and doesn't do much but she manages to somehow keep that office.
On top of all of this the toilet is unisex. I can't do a number 2 at work as I have been blamed before for the filth that is left in there simply because I am the only male in the office and of course we are the only ones that make a mess.
To top it all off we have a few blokes who are in upper management who drop by and decide to prop at my desk and do speed dates with me about football. It's almost like the line up and while I appreciate it, I unfortunately do have work to do sometimes and would prefer it just periodically thoughout the day not in bursts.
One of the guys in upper management wrote down my tips for the round one Friday. He did my tips and got the 8 winners. Apparantly won a fair bit. The next Friday he rang and asked for my tips again and got 8 again. I decided the next week I would throw a few supid tips in there... he got 8 again. Never even git a thanks. I called in sick the next Friday and he decided to go with his own tips and loaded up. Didn't win and lost it all.
I am the only male (this is not as good as it sounds) and there are only 4 of us under 40 of the 11 in the office.
The receptionist is related to the state manager and is close to retirement age but recently got remarried and has a giant mortgage. She is deaf, literally deaf but will never lose her job due to her relation being in charge. She says she can't afford a hearing aid but then went and bought an iPhone out right.
We then have the "person" I sit next to who one day will be your best friend and the next day refuse to speak to you but will listen to every conversation you have with other people. This conversations sometimes get reported back to management. Since I found this out I now only talk to anyone about work. Open plan offices kill me.
We then have my direct manager and the operations manager. It's the best puppet show I have ever seen. My direct manager is in the operations managers office at least 6 hours of the day. They have offices of course, not like us plebs.
But then we have the operations managers pet who is supposed to be a pleb but has her own office. She is a part timer and doesn't do much but she manages to somehow keep that office.
On top of all of this the toilet is unisex. I can't do a number 2 at work as I have been blamed before for the filth that is left in there simply because I am the only male in the office and of course we are the only ones that make a mess.
To top it all off we have a few blokes who are in upper management who drop by and decide to prop at my desk and do speed dates with me about football. It's almost like the line up and while I appreciate it, I unfortunately do have work to do sometimes and would prefer it just periodically thoughout the day not in bursts.
One of the guys in upper management wrote down my tips for the round one Friday. He did my tips and got the 8 winners. Apparantly won a fair bit. The next Friday he rang and asked for my tips again and got 8 again. I decided the next week I would throw a few supid tips in there... he got 8 again. Never even git a thanks. I called in sick the next Friday and he decided to go with his own tips and loaded up. Didn't win and lost it all.
SugarShane
C12 H22 O11
Hate those people who relay every conversation you have. Quite a few stooges here have recently installed solar panels so regular chat around here is how many gigawatts they all got on sunny days etc. The other day, the office/accounts lady (the nosiest person you'd meet) tells me she's just had them installed on her house, and said and i quote "But don't worry, you won't have to worry about me bragging about my kilowatt hours like the others!"
To which i replied in a joking manner, "Oh good, i hear plenty enough of that already!"
About 2 minutes later i walk past the front counter where one of the blokes with a system says in a half joking, but could sense some inner pissed offness way, "Guess how many kilowatt hours i got today SugarShane?! Or would that bore you too much?"
Bloody hate people like our accounts lady. You say something trivial, and only in response to something she said, and she goes and tells everyone and quite obviously, adds some sweeteners to the story too.
To which i replied in a joking manner, "Oh good, i hear plenty enough of that already!"
About 2 minutes later i walk past the front counter where one of the blokes with a system says in a half joking, but could sense some inner pissed offness way, "Guess how many kilowatt hours i got today SugarShane?! Or would that bore you too much?"
Bloody hate people like our accounts lady. You say something trivial, and only in response to something she said, and she goes and tells everyone and quite obviously, adds some sweeteners to the story too.
That's when you turn around and say, yeah, why are you telling me?
Malibu#27
Premium Platinum
Spent 6 months working interstate in Sydney.
While I was there, one of the guys had gotten married and brought photo album in to show a few photos off, and had it sitting on his desk.
Album ended up going missing, and was found a few days later when an older (very strange) bloke brought it back to the guy that had gotten married and said he'd taken it home to show his wife.
Same older weird guy also had a liking for hosting foreign exchange students, and there were 'stories' about his motives.
While I was there, one of the guys had gotten married and brought photo album in to show a few photos off, and had it sitting on his desk.
Album ended up going missing, and was found a few days later when an older (very strange) bloke brought it back to the guy that had gotten married and said he'd taken it home to show his wife.
Same older weird guy also had a liking for hosting foreign exchange students, and there were 'stories' about his motives.
- Mar 25, 2003
- 35,681
- 28,334
need a proper first to the face.
**** if i ever get to the point where i'm talking about my gigawattage on sunny days it's definately time to just chuck it all in (unless of course i become an eletrical salesman and it's making me some $$$$, but that is very unlikely)
- Jun 12, 2010
- 365
- 0
- AFL Club
- Carlton
- Banned
- #123
So If some guy grabs another guys nuts in his work clothes and has a laugh, the other guy should think it is cool. The guy has every right to knock him, same If a guy put his arm around him.
Nothing compared with some of the stories, and I've already posted, but I remembered a few more. My first job was in retail, and my manager was a 40 year old woman who was in love with the company and had been trying to make the transition from store manager to head office for the last 6 years. She had an entire room in her flat dedicated to various custom-made boots from this company which she had obtained through uniform allowances and staff discounts. By her own reckoning she had about 40-50 pairs. The value of these would have ranged from about $360 to over $1000 each. She also, apparently, had a penchant for younger male employees, and had on a several occasions after staff parties taken one of the 18-24 year old sales assistants back to her custom-boot-infested sex den.
She also used to regularly refer back to when she was a "heifer" (she used to be rather large, apparently), which would just be awkward (especially when there were some slightly overweight female employees who were part of the conversation). She played favourites to a disgusting degree. I was a favourite of hers (no prizes for guessing why, and no I didn't hit that), and got promoted to a full-time position after just a couple of months, despite this being my first job ever and there being several other casuals who would have been more suited. Not only that, but because of my age at the time (18), my pay actually went up $3 an hour, and it couldn't have even been a long-term decision because they knew I was going to live in another city in 8 months time. I didn't complain, but it was dodgy as ****. A friend of mine who actually got me the job and had been working there for a year was one of her least favourites (female, smart, good leadership, really good at her job, so again no surprises), and I got promoted over the top of her. I talked about it with her (despite the manager telling me expressly not to), she didn't want the promotion, she was getting four shifts a week at casual rates for a 21+ year old, and so would have been earning not much more for an extra shift a week, but she was super-pissed she wasn't offered it first.
Another one was a semi-retiree I was working with at the same time. He wasn't that weird, but he too absolutely loved the company, and the clothes, and had that brand of old-school, casual racism that simply made things extremely awkward. He was dating an Asian woman (who he made slightly awkward references too, and to this day I'm not sure she wasn't a Filipino bride he'd paid for), but would come out with the most monstrously racist comments. The most memorable was when he, another workmate and I were talking about "ghetto" black names, in the context of the book Freakonomics. We were having a chuckle at some ridiculous ones, then he comes out with, "Yeah, what are they thinking? They've only climbed out of the trees 5 minutes ago, and it shows". Well, that was the end of that conversation.
He also had some other weird things going on; he sort of asked this other workmate on a date, not in a romantic sense, both were straight, but he insisted he take him for dinner, at the local RSL of all places (keeping in mind he was about 40 years older). Apparently it was super awkward. He also dropped hints about his other job/hobby, which I eventually determined had something to do with taking photos of dead bodies at a hospital. He said he did it mainly to fuel his enthusiasm for photography and didn't get paid much at all.
Oh, and another guy I worked with at the same store, who was an assistant manager, was a great guy, but he was extremely awkward with women. Like, unbelievably so. Couldn't really talk to female coworkers at all (though he could talk to female customers no problem, and could pick up when drinking). He also just came out with odd non sequiturs, misused turns of phrase, would go randomly from joking around to "OK, seriously, get back to work", etc. He also hated body hair, and had all of the hair on his arms and legs (and I'm presuming elsewhere as well, but I never asked) zapped off with lasers or electrolysis or some s**t. He shaved his head as well. As I said, really great guy, but weird.
Oh, and another guy was about 40, but looked about 60. I'm guessing he was gay, but it was never really specified. Drank a ridiculous amount, turned up to staff nights out at fancy bars in a dirty tracksuit and hoody (wouldn't get in on account of looking homeless), smoked like a chimney, wouldn't be surprised if he was into ice, etc, etc, etc. Tried to give me a back massage on several occasions. That said, he was great fun to work with, probably the best value coworker in the world. He was a manager, or 2IC or something (depended on the store he was working in at any one particular time, really), but couldn't have cared less about what we did or how the shop went. Spent most of our time cracking jokes and laughing at the customers behind their backs.
Yeah, didn't really occur to me at the time, since it was my first job, but there really were some strange characters in that store.
She also used to regularly refer back to when she was a "heifer" (she used to be rather large, apparently), which would just be awkward (especially when there were some slightly overweight female employees who were part of the conversation). She played favourites to a disgusting degree. I was a favourite of hers (no prizes for guessing why, and no I didn't hit that), and got promoted to a full-time position after just a couple of months, despite this being my first job ever and there being several other casuals who would have been more suited. Not only that, but because of my age at the time (18), my pay actually went up $3 an hour, and it couldn't have even been a long-term decision because they knew I was going to live in another city in 8 months time. I didn't complain, but it was dodgy as ****. A friend of mine who actually got me the job and had been working there for a year was one of her least favourites (female, smart, good leadership, really good at her job, so again no surprises), and I got promoted over the top of her. I talked about it with her (despite the manager telling me expressly not to), she didn't want the promotion, she was getting four shifts a week at casual rates for a 21+ year old, and so would have been earning not much more for an extra shift a week, but she was super-pissed she wasn't offered it first.
Another one was a semi-retiree I was working with at the same time. He wasn't that weird, but he too absolutely loved the company, and the clothes, and had that brand of old-school, casual racism that simply made things extremely awkward. He was dating an Asian woman (who he made slightly awkward references too, and to this day I'm not sure she wasn't a Filipino bride he'd paid for), but would come out with the most monstrously racist comments. The most memorable was when he, another workmate and I were talking about "ghetto" black names, in the context of the book Freakonomics. We were having a chuckle at some ridiculous ones, then he comes out with, "Yeah, what are they thinking? They've only climbed out of the trees 5 minutes ago, and it shows". Well, that was the end of that conversation.
He also had some other weird things going on; he sort of asked this other workmate on a date, not in a romantic sense, both were straight, but he insisted he take him for dinner, at the local RSL of all places (keeping in mind he was about 40 years older). Apparently it was super awkward. He also dropped hints about his other job/hobby, which I eventually determined had something to do with taking photos of dead bodies at a hospital. He said he did it mainly to fuel his enthusiasm for photography and didn't get paid much at all.
Oh, and another guy I worked with at the same store, who was an assistant manager, was a great guy, but he was extremely awkward with women. Like, unbelievably so. Couldn't really talk to female coworkers at all (though he could talk to female customers no problem, and could pick up when drinking). He also just came out with odd non sequiturs, misused turns of phrase, would go randomly from joking around to "OK, seriously, get back to work", etc. He also hated body hair, and had all of the hair on his arms and legs (and I'm presuming elsewhere as well, but I never asked) zapped off with lasers or electrolysis or some s**t. He shaved his head as well. As I said, really great guy, but weird.
Oh, and another guy was about 40, but looked about 60. I'm guessing he was gay, but it was never really specified. Drank a ridiculous amount, turned up to staff nights out at fancy bars in a dirty tracksuit and hoody (wouldn't get in on account of looking homeless), smoked like a chimney, wouldn't be surprised if he was into ice, etc, etc, etc. Tried to give me a back massage on several occasions. That said, he was great fun to work with, probably the best value coworker in the world. He was a manager, or 2IC or something (depended on the store he was working in at any one particular time, really), but couldn't have cared less about what we did or how the shop went. Spent most of our time cracking jokes and laughing at the customers behind their backs.
Yeah, didn't really occur to me at the time, since it was my first job, but there really were some strange characters in that store.
How's that even comparable to scruffing someone's hair up?
