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Nanny the Goat Throws Her Hooves in the Ring for SFA Admin Job: “People Don’t Trust Humans Anymore”
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In an unexpected turn of events, Nanny, the prized goat of the famously electrifying full forward for the Roys The Goat Baron, has announced her candidacy for the coveted SFA admin role.

Her campaign slogan? “Four legs good, no corruption.” The announcement, delivered via a headbutt to the side of a ute plastered with a homemade campaign poster, has sent ripples across the Sweet community.

Nanny’s decision to run comes in the wake of growing public dissatisfaction with human leadership in the SFA. After a string of botched decisions, questionable effics, and a tendency to hold meetings at inconvenient times (like 2:30am. on a Wednesday), faith in human admins has dwindled.

Nanny, already popular for her tireless community (especially with the Roys and Elmer_Hauser) engagement and unflappable presence at every Roys BBQ and game, sees a gap she believes she can fill—with fairness, humility, and a healthy appetite for Clarke’s meat pies.

“The people don’t trust humans to do the job properly anymore,” said a local Roys player, who preferred to remain anonymous for fear of retaliation from the current admin.

“Nanny might be a goat, but at least she listens. You ever looked into her eyes? That’s not a beast, that’s leadership.” said opposition player Pugsley

The Goat Baron, for his part, has made it clear he has “no time or inclination” to toss his name into the political paddock. “I’m not one for desks or decisions,” he said from his throne, “but Nanny’s keen as a Clarke’s meat pie for this. And honestly, she’s got more sense than most people I know including Mobbs our captain.”

Despite being quadrupedal and non-verbal in the human sense, Nanny’s campaign has been surprisingly robust. Her handlers have trained her to respond to policy suggestions with a series of nods, bleats, or strategic defecations to indicate her stance.

Her official platform includes promises of fairer livestock treatment, rotating fixturing schedules, and finally fixing the broken tap at the SFA meeting hall that DemurePrincess broke at the leagues last B&F

Critics have raised concerns about a goat’s ability to handle bureaucratic responsibilities, but Nanny’s supporters are quick to counter that argument. “She’s already shown more initiative than the last two admins combined,” said a random anonymous opponent.

“She doesn’t need to talk. Her actions speak louder than words—and her commitment to fairness is unmatched.”

Nanny’s campaign events are a hit, drawing large crowds who show up for photos, hay bale BBQs, and the now-iconic “Kiss the Goat” booth. Children adore her, older folks trust her, and most SFA players believe she understands the league better than any clipboard-wielding human could.

As the election approaches, one thing is clear: the SFA is ready for change, and Nanny may just be the unlikely hero they need. Whether she wins or not, her candidacy has already brought the community closer together—and maybe that’s the real victory.

mmmmmm, smoked goat...

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