ASADA to Essendon
ASADA: Here's a show cause notice.
Essendon: Where's the evidence? This just states the allegation.
ASADA: That's what it is meant to do. The evidence comes later, if you don't show cause why the allegation is false. That's how the process works, yo.
Essendon: You're not showing us the evidence cos there is no evidence!!! This is a conspiracy!!! Our rights are being infringed!!! We're not being given due process!!! And...stuff! We want our stuff! We're off to court!!!
ASADA: ........ok, that was weird. Well then, court it is! Let's get back to the process once your little hissy fit is finished, yeah?
Essendon: FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!
ASADA: Oh dear. Anyways, we still need to deal with Cronulla - let's just give you guys some space and we'll go and deal with them, ok?
ASADA to Cronulla
ASADA: Here's a show cause notice. Oh, and so you don't go loco and rush off to court like those crazies down south, here's the evidence as well. Might save us all some stupid.
Cronulla players: Yeah, that doesn't look good.
ASADA: Yeah, we figured that too. But it isn't entirely the players' fault. And hey, cos you're actually being sensible, let's cut a deal, yeah?
Cronulla: **** yeah, where do we sign?