Society & Culture Terrible baby names

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I think possibly the worst thing about giving your kid a typical dickish "unique" name is that by doing so, you're treating them as a showpiece; a human example of a fashion accessory.

In my opinion, a name should come down to several factors. Well, you can do whatever the hell you please, but this is the criteria I'd use:
1. It must be a strong name; a name that commands respect. I don't include faux tribal names given to white kids in that list. And just because Mercedes and Bentley command respect in the automotive industry, it doesn't mean they will on a resume, so cut that s**t out.
2. It must be future proof. In the year 2060, your kid should be able to look at their name a hell of a lot better than my Mum looks back at photos of her mid-nineties Rachel hairdo.
3. If you absolutely must give your child an alternative version of a name, make it subtle. Anything more than that and you just look like a w*nker parent. No Jazzmyn for Jasmine, Jakksyn for Jackson, or Grayse for Grace for example.
4. Avoid giving your child the same first name as your own. Not only does it show unoriginality, it also makes everything unnecessarily difficult in the household. Read: "Hey Matt" "Yeah?" "Not you, your father" "Jesus Christ, not this again". Extra w*nker points apply for the inclusion of generational suffixes, particularly Roman numerals, following your child's name (for example; Matthew John Simpson III).
5. I'm not against people creating a new name, but there's no need to be overly complicated in the spelling or pronunciation of it.

It's a child's name; not a marketing tool. Creativity need not be the highest of priorities in this very simplistic, but important life moment.
 
Croweater said:
I think possibly the worst thing about giving your kid a typical dickish "unique" name is that by doing so, you're treating them as a showpiece; a human example of a fashion accessory.

In my opinion, a name should come down to several factors. Well, you can do whatever the hell you please, but this is the criteria I'd use:
1. It must be a strong name; a name that commands respect. I don't include faux tribal names given to white kids in that list. And just because Mercedes and Bentley command respect in the automotive industry, it doesn't mean they will on a resume, so cut that s**t out.
2. It must be future proof. In the year 2060, your kid should be able to look at their name a hell of a lot better than my Mum looks back at photos of her mid-nineties Rachel hairdo.
3. If you absolutely must give your child an alternative version of a name, make it subtle. Anything more than that and you just look like a w*nker parent. No Jazzmyn for Jasmine, Jakksyn for Jackson, or Grayse for Grace for example.
4. Avoid giving your child the same first name as your own. Not only does it show unoriginality, it also makes everything unnecessarily difficult in the household. Read: "Hey Matt" "Yeah?" "Not you, your father" "Jesus Christ, not this again". Extra w*nker points apply for the inclusion of generational suffixes, particularly Roman numerals, following your child's name (for example; Matthew John Simpson III).
5. I'm not against people creating a new name, but there's no need to be overly complicated in the spelling or pronunciation of it.

It's a child's name; not a marketing tool. Creativity need not be the highest of priorities in this very simplistic, but important life moment.
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Holy * I couldn't agree more
 

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My parents did an extremely w*nky thing and gave me two middle names.

When they called out my full name at uni graduation, I realised just how pompous it sounds. My middle names are both strong names like my first name, but put together? Jesus. A few of my friends have two middle names too. Talk about a w*nker brigade. :$
 
Cruyff14 said:
Mine is my dad's name, really like it.
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Gough said:
That's cool, she's great. Mine is the same as my old man, grandfather, and great grandfather. It's our only dynastic tendency.
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Do you 2 share the same middle name as your forebears so that it's I, II, III and IV (for Gough) and Sr and Jr (for Cruffy?)
 
Croweater said:
My parents did an extremely w*nky thing and gave me two middle names.

When they called out my full name at uni graduation, I realised just how pompous it sounds. My middle names are both strong names like my first name, but put together? Jesus. A few of my friends have two middle names too. Talk about a w*nker brigade. :$
Click to expand...

So you are not a "third" or anything? Jnr? :p

Thought all you upperclassers did stuff like that.
 
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