The AFL Prototype year 2050 supporter

[Byron Porkett]

With the AFL regime cracking down on what is considered appropriate behaviour at the football, it is clear they are angling for a particular type of fan. Fortunately, I have stumbled upon the prototype-configurations of the AFL's desirable 2050 supporter....


PRE GAME:
- Happily pay a $10.20 levy to offset the carbon emissions from catching public transport
- Protest outside the M/WCG about the AFL still using the inhumane practice of playing football with a Sherrin made from kangaroo leather
- Meet friends inside the stadium at the vegan juice bar for a pre-game kale smoothie
- Shake the hands of opposition supporters and wish them good luck
- Go to the gender neutral dunnies before taking your seat

DURING GAME:
- Take your seat but do not identify with any specific team
- Reserve loudest cheers for when the umpires enter the arena
- Enjoy the AFL-M curtain raiser event
- Remain silent and politely "sshhhh" to demand silence to surrounding supporters when a player is having a set shot at goal
- A quick trip back to the gender neutral dunnies before the main event; the AFL-W
- Report an unruly supporter to stadium security for yelling profanities such as "blast!" and "good grief!"

POST GAME
- Congratulate all supporters on a wonderful game
- More thrilled about winning their fantasy team game than the actual result
- Login to Big/Small/Fat/ThinFooty and post on the Mainboard without trolling


If you can think of any other key characteristics of the AFL's desired 2050 supporter, please post away

 

[zackah]

Fat/ThinFooty

Racist

 

[IggypopsTshirt]

Can’t speak, doesn’t think, easy to * and dispenses cash readily.

 

[Art Corvelay]

Login to Big/Small/Fat/ThinFooty and post on the Mainboard without trolling

Place will be well shutdown by then after Google objects to the standard of content.

 

[Grin]

With the AFL regime cracking down on what is considered appropriate behaviour at the football, it is clear they are angling for a particular type of fan. Fortunately, I have stumbled upon the prototype-configurations of the AFL's desirable 2050 supporter....
View attachment 690829

PRE GAME:
- Happily pay a $10.20 levy to offset the carbon emissions from catching public transport
- Protest outside the M/WCG about the AFL still using the inhumane practice of playing football with a Sherrin made from kangaroo leather
- Meet friends inside the stadium at the vegan juice bar for a pre-game kale smoothie
- Shake the hands of opposition supporters and wish them good luck
- Go to the gender neutral dunnies before taking your seat

DURING GAME:
- Take your seat but do not identify with any specific team
- Reserve loudest cheers for when the umpires enter the arena
- Enjoy the AFL-M curtain raiser event
- Remain silent and politely "sshhhh" to demand silence to surrounding supporters when a player is having a set shot at goal
- A quick trip back to the gender neutral dunnies before the main event; the AFL-W
- Report an unruly supporter to stadium security for yelling profanities such as "blast!" and "good grief!"

POST GAME
- Congratulate all supporters on a wonderful game
- More thrilled about winning their fantasy team game than the actual result
- Login to Big/Small/Fat/ThinFooty and post on the Mainboard without trolling


If you can think of any other key characteristics of the AFL's desired 2050 supporter, please post away

Shouldn't this prototype have gambled his entire salary on the game? Leaving his family destitute and reliant on food packages and emergency accommodation?

 

[NetworkNerd]

Meat pies will have been replaced by a lovely vegan cheese platter

 

[Dinsdale]

I will have to change my barracking behaviour:

1. I will politely exclaim "I hope my team wins", but not too loud
2. I will point out that the folically challenged umpire may need to visit an optometrist in the near future
3. I will call them green-clad fly-larvae, but only in a jovial manner
4. I will say that the opposition, whilst highly respected, are still the top layer of distasteful matter from a rancid swamp