Entertainment & Music The Simpsons Part 3

Big Sauce 21

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Lisa:
Dad, I think he's an ivory dealer! His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I'm pretty sure that cheque is ivory.
Homer: Lisa, a guy who's got lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.
Lisa: Mr. Blackheart?
Mr. Blackheart: Yes, my pretty?
Lisa: Are you an ivory dealer?
Mr. Blackheart: Little girl, I've had lots of jobs in my day: Whale hunter, seal clubber, President of the Fox network ... and like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory.

Bart: Dad, you can't do this. Stampy is my friend.
Homer: Don't worry, son. I'll get you a new elephant.
Mr. Blackheart: I'll take that one too.
Homer: Done.
Mr. Blackheart: All right, I'll be back in the morning to pick up Stampy.



Homer:
Here's the keys.
Mr. Blackheart: Elephants don't have keys.
Homer: Well, I'll just keep these then.
That made me giggle out loud
 

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glenferry23

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Lisa:
Dad, I think he's an ivory dealer! His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I'm pretty sure that cheque is ivory.
Homer: Lisa, a guy who's got lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.
Lisa: Mr. Blackheart?
Mr. Blackheart: Yes, my pretty?
Lisa: Are you an ivory dealer?
Mr. Blackheart: Little girl, I've had lots of jobs in my day: Whale hunter, seal clubber, President of the Fox network ... and like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory.

Bart: Dad, you can't do this. Stampy is my friend.
Homer: Don't worry, son. I'll get you a new elephant.
Mr. Blackheart: I'll take that one too.
Homer: Done.
Mr. Blackheart: All right, I'll be back in the morning to pick up Stampy.



Homer:
Here's the keys.
Mr. Blackheart: Elephants don't have keys.
Homer: Well, I'll just keep these then.
This scene really is genuis. Almost impossible to describe how good it is without actually watching it. The voice on him is perfect too - and the sound effect of that 'click' when he flicks the ivory cheque :D

Absolutely fvcking glorious.
 

Knighta21

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Beekeeper 1: Well, sure is quiet in here today.

Beekeeper 2: Yes, a little too quiet, if you know what I mean.

Beekeeper 1: Hmm... I'm afraid I don't.

Beekeeper 2: You see, bees usually make a lot of noise. No noise! - suggests no bees

Beekeeper 1: Oh, I understand now.

Beekeeper 1: Oh look, there goes one now.

 

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Barry_Badrinath

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Home Finals at the MCG
Time for some McGarnagle love.

Chief:
You're off the case McGarnagle.
McGarnagle: You're off your case.
Chief: What does that even mean?
Homer to TV: It means he gets results you stupid chief!


Voice over: Next, on “McGarnagle”, McGarnagle is framed for a crime he didn’t commit. And only one person can clear his name: a little sissy boy who’s too scared to come forward.

McGarnagle: Now tell them what you saw Billy.
Billy: But I'm so scared McGarnagle.
McGarnagle: You've gotta do this one for me Billy, McGarnagle.
Billy: Okay. For you, McGarnagle.

Chief: Well, McGarnagle, Billy is DEAD! They slit his throat from ear to ear.
McGarnagle: Hey, I’m trying to eat lunch here!
 
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Nelson: Give me your fortune or I'll pound your withered old face in!
Mr Burns: Ooh, I like his energy. Put him on the callback list.

Martin: Clang, clang, clang went the trolley. Ring, ring, ring went the bell. Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings-

Mr Burns: Thank you! Give the bully an extra point.
 
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Sheffield Wednesday
Lisa: Hey! Mom, Bart's throwing peas.
Marge: Bart, don't throw peas at your sister.
Bart: Mr. Burns throws peas at Smithers. [flicks a pea at Lisa]
Lisa: Ow! That was a big one!
Marge: Homer, say something.
Homer: Lisa, quit getting in the way of your wealthy brother's peas.
 
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