Media THE SPITCOAL MEDAL Round 1

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Rodney Dangerfield

Doesn’t matter
Mar 28, 2005
36,097
84,012
Melbourne
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Liverpool,Bournemouth
Roys v Gumbies
3- saintkildaman (Gumbies) WOWEE a real Rodders special did not get on the park.

2- Riviat (Gumbies) I feel like I inspire my teammates and Riv took it to the bank in an insipid effort as rover barely touching the Qooty. Very proud.

1- Jivlain (Gumbies) whilst not in Rodders territory giving up 5 goals was a nice spitcoal effort. Try doing it in a half though and then we’ll chat.
 

Jivlain

Pollyanna's statistician
Sep 19, 2015
4,953
8,703
Cambridgeshire
AFL Club
Brisbane Lions
Other Teams
Swansea City, Gumbies FFC
Roys v Gumbies
3- saintkildaman (Gumbies) WOWEE a real Rodders special did not get on the park.

2- Riviat (Gumbies) I feel like I inspire my teammates and Riv took it to the bank in dn insipod effort as river barely touching the Qooty. Very proud.

1- Jivlain (Gumbies) whilst not in Rodders territory giving up 5 goals was a nice spitcoal effort. Try doing it in a half though and then we’ll chat.
Is this esteemed award associated with a mechanised fist-themed trophy?
 

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Rodney Dangerfield

Doesn’t matter
Mar 28, 2005
36,097
84,012
Melbourne
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Liverpool,Bournemouth
Bombers v Furies
3- miggs ((bombers) Now we are talking! This is Rodders territory and then some!
I’ve been here many a time, Full Forward for one kick and no goals! This is big time stuff and I’m almost jealous.

2- Wacky Tiger (Furies)Would you believe it? This pair may have made history two full forwards. One kick each and no goals.
Pure sh*t! Surely it’s a first?

1- Waynesworld (Bombers) puts the post-performance question to bed. Had about 50 more times posts than touches.
Brave though.
 

Tony Lynn 15

Hall of Famer
Mar 21, 2008
32,293
67,179
Melbourne
AFL Club
Carlton
Other Teams
Baghdad Bombers
As I myself lurch from sh*t season to sh*t season as a laughing stock in the league I wondered just what it is I can get out of my Sweet FA career?

What are my strengths? What can I be good at? What Legacy can I leave?

I thought long and hard and as the days turn into weeks and the weeks turned into months my empty head remained empty.
And then I thought don’t fight it Rodders you know exactly what you’re good at,you’re good at being sh*t so embrace your shitness,celebrate your shitness!

The only thing I’ve ever been good at in this league is passing on my shitness to others in my kiss of death series back long ago when the Bushwood Country Club thrived pre Covid days, when Wang would get the guest pissed and we’d just hang sh*t on them pre the days when everything was offensive.

Today Wang and I would hang.
But one thing years of being sh*t has taught me is to judge just who really is sh*t in this league not everyone can be truly greatly sh*t. It takes a special type of shitness you must be able to play in an array of positions you must be able to play ruck rover and not tackle play fall forward for no goals weeks on end,play fullback have bags upon bags kicked on you, play an almost 200 game career without a hitout,take teams who are full of promise crashing to the bottom of the ladder.

Just playing in a back pocket or a forward pocket and not accumulating stats does not make one sh*t, plenty of these types of players have existed in the sweet FA they’ve played in premierships, they played in some of the main positions and had huge seasons that’s not sh*t, sh*t is doing it year after year after year playing all over the park maintaining your shitness.

I have literally walked away from teams ensuring that they have instant success, that my friends is sh*t so I think I’m very well placed to judge just who really is sh*t.

So this season I am going to be casting a keen eye over Match threads once again and I’ll be voting 3-2–1 on who I deem to be the shittest players in the game for the Spitcoal Medal, Shittest Players In This campaigner Of A League. I could have called it the Rodders Medal or something but that would make me a w***er and I am also allowing myself to be judged and voted on by myself.
I’m currently $2.30 favorite.

Wang called me last night pleading for it to be based on the Shittest Player In This Crappy Underwhelming Mess, The Spitcum Medal he argued has a better ring to it.
“Times have changed my friend” I said to my old mate “you a sof cun thee day Ronny” he said as he hung up on me.
I’ll be endeavoring to give brief write ups on the very Shittest performances each week with the votes, some will view it as belittling.. and it is.
Just double down Rodney and finally euthanase your career. Join the Bombers.
 

Riviat

Real name redoxted
Feb 5, 2017
5,790
14,451
The Capital
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
76ers, Gumbies
Roys v Gumbies
3- saintkildaman (Gumbies) WOWEE a real Rodders special did not get on the park.

2- Riviat (Gumbies) I feel like I inspire my teammates and Riv took it to the bank in an insipid effort as rover barely touching the Qooty. Very proud.

1- Jivlain (Gumbies) whilst not in Rodders territory giving up 5 goals was a nice spitcoal effort. Try doing it in a half though and then we’ll chat.
I broke a nail in the first quarter :cry:
 

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Fizzler

#BarUp
Dec 26, 2013
9,721
9,919
Just refuelling ⛽
AFL Club
Port Adelaide
Other Teams
BOLTS, REN, OKC, WFC, LVB, STORM
Demons v Bears
What a ******* uninspiring start where every player who was meant to perform per position do so. What type of world is that? Boring campaigners.
3 votes- Fizzler (Bears)seriously ordinary coming on to the ground just before quarter time to mind a forward pocket opponent who went on to kick 4 goals. You couldn’t start drinking early enough seriously.

2 votes- Ok Boomer(Bears) just a ******* nothing game albeit in a nothing position.

1 vote- sante(Demons) fu** me are you still playing? Give it away.
Oh fu** yeah, this medal is exactly what I live for
 

Wacky Tiger

Parmy
Aug 26, 2004
26,152
40,064
Country SA
AFL Club
Richmond
Other Teams
Fighting Furies, Sturt, Rockets
Bombers v Furies
3- miggs ((bombers) Now we are talking! This is Rodders territory and then some!
I’ve been here many a time, Full Forward for one kick and no goals! This is big time stuff and I’m almost jealous.

2- Wacky Tiger (Furies)Would you believe it? This pair may have made history two full forwards. One kick each and no goals.
Pure sh*t! Surely it’s a first?


1- Waynesworld (Bombers) puts the post-performance question to bed. Had about 50 more times posts than touches.
Brave though.





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