The Weekly Banner Thread

[BrisDog]

There once was player named Hamling
Who played in a flag he was awesome,
Now under the coaching of Lyon
He resembles a spud named Zac Dawson.

(Way too Long I know)

 

[Bodicifer]

We flew over to Perth
The most remote place on earth
To play against the Dockers
Now show us your knockers

 

[grassman75]

This thread was made for all of us
To bait our weekly foes
It really is a no brainer
Unless you are dogwatch the campaigner
(I mean that in the good kind of way)

Touché Mr dogwatch Touché

 

[Libba39]

Dear Mr Lyon,
Thanks for being a mate,
And giving us this practice game,
For West Coast in round eight.

 

[Kennel Master]

Western Bulldogs
Last week - Horse breakers
This week - Lyon tamers.

KM

 

[DelRe]

There once was player named Hamling
Who played in a flag he was awesome,
Now under the coaching of Lyon
He resembles a spud named Zac Dawson.

(Way too Long I know)

There once was a young man named Joel
Who's career at Freo fell in a hole
Now he hates life at the Dockers
At half time he tried to switch lockers
While his new coach has applied for the dole

 

[Ghenghis]

Western Bulldogs
Last week - Horse breakers
This week - Lyon tamers.

KM

I like this one. Wouldn't mind seeing it for real.

It reminds me of a banner from 1975 between Collingwood and Footscray where their banner simply said:
'Weeds kill Roses'.
Probably the only time you could attribute humour, cleverness or correct spelling to the Collingwood cheer squad.

 

[House_of_Dahl]

Ross Lyon is good
At keeping a low score
But f..k me dead
His game plan is a bore.


So you like the look of JJ
Watch him cut you up like a knife
If you want him, you can have him
For a sweetener plus Fyfe


Freo are in free fall
But wait till Sandi no longer rucks
Then no one over the ditch
Will give you the tiniest of f..ks

 

[Bont2Bruce]

BRWB

Your thread idea has been literally been adopted by the drug cheats:

 

[maddog37]

BRWB

Your thread idea has been literally been adopted by the drug cheats:

We like it in needles
We like it in pills
Rules aren't for us
Cos we got cash folding bills.

 

[BRWB]

BRWB

Your thread idea has been literally been adopted by the drug cheats:

I was also a big fan of injecting dodgy supplements a decade ago.

 

[JEDi 44]

for the ultimate insult we shouldn't even bother with a banner at all

 

[House_of_Dahl]

BRWB

Your thread idea has been literally been adopted by the drug cheats:

We shot up on peptides
And told our players no worries
Then picked up pick one
But still get smashed by the doggies

#DonTheBanner


Is that doing it right?

 

[DelRe]

BRWB

Your thread idea has been literally been adopted by the drug cheats:

"Whatever it takes"

 

[Bemoreboyddog]

Freo are so poor,
This will be over by the half
Someone call a doctor,
Harley's just done his other calf!

 

[WATCHDOG]

The best things in life are free like
Free Beer, Free Tickets and Free Kicks

Fremantle?

You're doing it wrong!!

 

[jdz101]

Hamling left us for cash
To help save Ross Lyon
But Freo remain s**t
And the Dogs are still flyin

 

[Libba39]

Against the Blue-baggers
We will never give up
But please don't make us
Wee in a cup

#DonTheBanner

 

[NBates]

Sorry if this is not quite the right place (media thread?), but I think I might go to one of the gigs:

Comedy Festival 2017: Danny McGinlay’s Bulldogs Bannerman Live! is a gift for footy fans ★★★½
James Wigney, Herald Sun
April 6, 2017 4:48pm

• A comedian’s guide to the unwritten rules of comedy viewing
• Danny McGinlay’s top picks at this year’s Comedy Festival
• A guide to being nicer to your AFL club’s whipping boy
• McGinlay’s shoo-in predictions and team banners for 2017

Last year’s epic AFL Grand Final win by the Western Bulldogs to break a 62-year premiership drought has mostly been breathlessly written and spoken about as a fairytale or a drama. And fair enough, too.

But Danny McGinlay has also found a rich vein of comedy in the team’s unlikely charge from easybeat to top dog and begins with a bold claim: “This is the story of I how I won the flag for the Bulldogs.”

For those sons (and daughters) of the West – and a quick show of hands suggests there are plenty in the room — it’s a chance to relive that one day in October, but just as much it’s a show about the crazy world of footy fandom and the highs we enjoy and the lows we endure for our teams.

McGinlay has worked on Utopia, The Project and The Footy Show, but his main claim to fame is as the bannerman for the Bulldogs – he’s the guy who comes up with those pithy rhymes and slogans that adorn the banners the players run through every week. And after a roundabout background of how he came to support the ultimate battler’s club (basically his mum was a tightarse), and a reliving of the Doggies many lean years, McGinlay explains how he got the gig for the seasons leading up to the biggest day in the club’s history, galvanised by a particularly lame banner and a flogging at the hands of fellow cellar-dwellers Brisbane in 2014.

With slides backing him up, he then embarks on a hilarious journey through some of the wildly inappropriate banners of the past (there really was one that said Lick Them Pussy’s, with the misplaced apostrophe the least wrong thing about it), before running through his favourite efforts, as well as some even funnier ones that were rejected out of hand by the Bulldogs “fun police”.

media_cameraBulldogs Bannerman Live! lets Danny McGinlay relive the Western Bulldogs’ premiership win over and over again.
All of which, of course, leads up to that grand final for the ages when, as luck would have it, McGinlay’s first child was due. And any true football fan will recognise the anxiety of having your team at the big dance (“it’s like your wedding day, but with a 50 per cent chance that she won’t say ‘I do’”) and the wild exhilaration and celebrations that followed.

While the focus is squarely on the Dogs, there’s plenty for all footy fans to love (non-Sherrin aficionados might struggle though) – from the inevitable, but still funny, digs at Collingwood to the Essendon drugs saga as well as gags at the expense of ex-players, conservative columnists and tourists in the audience slightly bewildered by the game.

And, as an added bonus, he caps the night off with a genuine Bulldog champion — Jordan Roughead comes on stage for some refreshingly loose revelations about the grand final prelude and its booze-soaked aftermath.


Danny McGinlay, Bulldogs Bannerman Live! Comic’s Lounge, 26 Errol St, North Melbourne, on April 9, 16 and 23. Buy tickets here

 

[worbod]

We'll travel over to Freo
and show them all our tricks.
We'll bamboozle them like Neo
did to the machines in The Matrix.

 

[BRWB]

Another retirement
We dip our lid
First with Pav
Now with Sid

 

[TempleKelvington]

I think the Freo Banner could go like this.

Put on your Superman capes, its wharfie time!

 

[TempleKelvington]

Sorry if this is not quite the right place (media thread?), but I think I might go to one of the gigs:

Comedy Festival 2017: Danny McGinlay’s Bulldogs Bannerman Live! is a gift for footy fans ★★★½
James Wigney, Herald Sun
April 6, 2017 4:48pm

• A comedian’s guide to the unwritten rules of comedy viewing
• Danny McGinlay’s top picks at this year’s Comedy Festival
• A guide to being nicer to your AFL club’s whipping boy
• McGinlay’s shoo-in predictions and team banners for 2017

Last year’s epic AFL Grand Final win by the Western Bulldogs to break a 62-year premiership drought has mostly been breathlessly written and spoken about as a fairytale or a drama. And fair enough, too.

But Danny McGinlay has also found a rich vein of comedy in the team’s unlikely charge from easybeat to top dog and begins with a bold claim: “This is the story of I how I won the flag for the Bulldogs.”

For those sons (and daughters) of the West – and a quick show of hands suggests there are plenty in the room — it’s a chance to relive that one day in October, but just as much it’s a show about the crazy world of footy fandom and the highs we enjoy and the lows we endure for our teams.

McGinlay has worked on Utopia, The Project and The Footy Show, but his main claim to fame is as the bannerman for the Bulldogs – he’s the guy who comes up with those pithy rhymes and slogans that adorn the banners the players run through every week. And after a roundabout background of how he came to support the ultimate battler’s club (basically his mum was a tightarse), and a reliving of the Doggies many lean years, McGinlay explains how he got the gig for the seasons leading up to the biggest day in the club’s history, galvanised by a particularly lame banner and a flogging at the hands of fellow cellar-dwellers Brisbane in 2014.

With slides backing him up, he then embarks on a hilarious journey through some of the wildly inappropriate banners of the past (there really was one that said Lick Them Pussy’s, with the misplaced apostrophe the least wrong thing about it), before running through his favourite efforts, as well as some even funnier ones that were rejected out of hand by the Bulldogs “fun police”.

media_cameraBulldogs Bannerman Live! lets Danny McGinlay relive the Western Bulldogs’ premiership win over and over again.
All of which, of course, leads up to that grand final for the ages when, as luck would have it, McGinlay’s first child was due. And any true football fan will recognise the anxiety of having your team at the big dance (“it’s like your wedding day, but with a 50 per cent chance that she won’t say ‘I do’”) and the wild exhilaration and celebrations that followed.

While the focus is squarely on the Dogs, there’s plenty for all footy fans to love (non-Sherrin aficionados might struggle though) – from the inevitable, but still funny, digs at Collingwood to the Essendon drugs saga as well as gags at the expense of ex-players, conservative columnists and tourists in the audience slightly bewildered by the game.

And, as an added bonus, he caps the night off with a genuine Bulldog champion — Jordan Roughead comes on stage for some refreshingly loose revelations about the grand final prelude and its booze-soaked aftermath.


Danny McGinlay, Bulldogs Bannerman Live! Comic’s Lounge, 26 Errol St, North Melbourne, on April 9, 16 and 23. Buy tickets here

Not sure I like him doing extra carricula activities, needs to focus.

 

[TempleKelvington]

Western Bulldogs
Last week - Horse breakers
This week - Lyon tamers.

KM

Next week, roo cullers!

 

[TempleKelvington]

Sandilands, get off the ground, you're scaring the kids!