- Banned
- #1
Just got these in the mail. I sense most of you would have recieved these jokes in the mail.
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Q. Did you hear that Australia Post had to recall their latest stamps?
A. They had pictures of Collingwood players on them. People couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
Q. Did you hear about the politician who was found dead in a Collingwood jersey?
A. The police had to dress him up in women's underwear in order to save his family from the embarrassment.
Four surgeons are taking a coffee break. The first one
says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up everything inside them is numbered." The second surgeon says, "Nah, librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third surgeon says, "Try electricians. Everything inside them is colour-coded." The fourth one says, "I prefer Collingwood fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and bums are interchangeable."
Q. What is a Collingwood fan's worst nightmare?
A. A 3rd Rocca brother.
Q. If you see a Collingwood fan on a bicycle, why should you never swerve to hit him?
A. It could be your bicycle.
Q. What do Collingwood fans and sperm have in common?
A. One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
Q. What do you have when 100 Collingwood fans are buried up to their necks in sand?
A. Not enough sand.
Q. You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a Collingwood
fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What do you do?
A. Shoot the Collingwood fan - twice.
Q. What's the difference between Eddie McGuire and a jet engine?
A. A jet engine eventually stops whining.
Q. How many Collingwood fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Seven - one to change it, five to moan about it and Eddie McGuire to say that if the umpire had done his job in the first place, the light bulb would never have gone out.
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Q. Did you hear that Australia Post had to recall their latest stamps?
A. They had pictures of Collingwood players on them. People couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
Q. Did you hear about the politician who was found dead in a Collingwood jersey?
A. The police had to dress him up in women's underwear in order to save his family from the embarrassment.
Four surgeons are taking a coffee break. The first one
says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up everything inside them is numbered." The second surgeon says, "Nah, librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third surgeon says, "Try electricians. Everything inside them is colour-coded." The fourth one says, "I prefer Collingwood fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and bums are interchangeable."
Q. What is a Collingwood fan's worst nightmare?
A. A 3rd Rocca brother.
Q. If you see a Collingwood fan on a bicycle, why should you never swerve to hit him?
A. It could be your bicycle.
Q. What do Collingwood fans and sperm have in common?
A. One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
Q. What do you have when 100 Collingwood fans are buried up to their necks in sand?
A. Not enough sand.
Q. You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a Collingwood
fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What do you do?
A. Shoot the Collingwood fan - twice.
Q. What's the difference between Eddie McGuire and a jet engine?
A. A jet engine eventually stops whining.
Q. How many Collingwood fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Seven - one to change it, five to moan about it and Eddie McGuire to say that if the umpire had done his job in the first place, the light bulb would never have gone out.
