Computers & Internet Tinder

[Jesse Custer]

It's more about her expectations of the app. You won't find LTR material on Tinder. Most of the guys on there are idiots after sex. Of course, many of them are also good looking so the women will still flock to it like flies on shit (almost literally).

Bullshit, you never know what you'll find. I gave it a go, met someone good and taking it slow. Not after random hookups anymore.

 

[Silent Alarm]

No issues with Tinder 'ethically' and socially for sex or courting. Plenty of people used the internet to facilitate contact with people. This is probably just an added step of anonymity and initial awkwardness when you meet, but that's not an issue – every first date is a little forced at the start. I remember a thing on ABC about a year ago where they were talking about Tinder. If my middle aged parents can have no qualms about it and find it a good thing, I've no idea how young people can hate it.

The issue I have is that I'm just not the sort to be on there. I have never had any luck on Tinder. The closest I got was some bird coming out with me, but despite being pretty good looking and getting a few macks off her, she was probably the dullest and oddest girl I have ever met (and that's why she was on there I guess). I'm a pretty good texter once I know the girl but I really can't get anything across straight off the bat on there. The girls who tend to like me aren't really huge on Tinder, and at age 20, you get the feeling (don't you, Den?) that a lot of the girls my age have a much wider pool (20-25) whereas the younger you are as a bloke, the smaller pool you have. I've had way more luck going to clubs and picking up.

Most of all though, it makes me feel incredibly lonely. You know when you stay way too late at a club and there's like 40 people there, 30 of them are dudes, and the girls are shockers? It's like that but you're not pissed. Eighteen months ago it had a higher proportion of good looking girls but now there are so many unattractive ones, it just makes me feel sorry for all these people... just an endless list of birds who are getting nothing but want someone.

 

[Sublime]

No issues with Tinder 'ethically' and socially for sex or courting. Plenty of people used the internet to facilitate contact with people. This is probably just an added step of anonymity and initial awkwardness when you meet, but that's not an issue – every first date is a little forced at the start. I remember a thing on ABC about a year ago where they were talking about Tinder. If my middle aged parents can have no qualms about it and find it a good thing, I've no idea how young people can hate it.

The issue I have is that I'm just not the sort to be on there. I have never had any luck on Tinder. The closest I got was some bird coming out with me, but despite being pretty good looking and getting a few macks off her, she was probably the dullest and oddest girl I have ever met (and that's why she was on there I guess). I'm a pretty good texter once I know the girl but I really can't get anything across straight off the bat on there. The girls who tend to like me aren't really huge on Tinder, and at age 20, you get the feeling (don't you, Den?) that a lot of the girls my age have a much wider pool (20-25) whereas the younger you are as a bloke, the smaller pool you have. I've had way more luck going to clubs and picking up.

Most of all though, it makes me feel incredibly lonely. You know when you stay way too late at a club and there's like 40 people there, 30 of them are dudes, and the girls are shockers? It's like that but you're not pissed. Eighteen months ago it had a higher proportion of good looking girls but now there are so many unattractive ones, it just makes me feel sorry for all these people... just an endless list of birds who are getting nothing but want someone.

You said that girl was odd and dull but good looking.

Perhaps one of the so called unattractive ones could be the most fun and interesting people you could ever meet? If you're looking to meet a person you can have a relationship with, it isn't always the complete stunner that's best for you.

 

[iDon]

You said that girl was odd and dull but good looking.

Perhaps one of the so called unattractive ones could be the most fun and interesting people you could ever meet? If you're looking to meet a person you can have a relationship with, it isn't always the complete stunner that's best for you.

The last girl I met up with off tinder wasn't my usual type at all but boy she was interesting and a lot of fun. Pity she went overseas for a few 6-12 months otherwise who knows what would have happened.

 

[Silent Alarm]

You said that girl was odd and dull but good looking.

Perhaps one of the so called unattractive ones could be the most fun and interesting people you could ever meet? If you're looking to meet a person you can have a relationship with, it isn't always the complete stunner that's best for you.

Kumbaya. Not gonna happen. You can't see someone you're not attracted to physically, it's just not going to work. Maybe if I was 35 and looking for someone to settle down with, then I'd start to emphasise personality, but when you're 20, who's really going to sleep with an ugly girl with an alright personality? Plus there's plenty of cute girls who are great to hang around with.

 

[Sublime]

Kumbaya. Not gonna happen. You can't see someone you're not attracted to physically, it's just not going to work. Maybe if I was 35 and looking for someone to settle down with, then I'd start to emphasise personality, but when you're 20, who's really going to sleep with an ugly girl with an alright personality? Plus there's plenty of cute girls who are great to hang around with.

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad. Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

 

[Damon_3388]

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad. Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

If you're not attracted to them, you're not attracted to them. Shouldn't have to compromise your own standards/tastes to factor in "do they like me too?". That's an instant route to "settling" for someone just to be with someone, and being unhappy, which isn't really fair on anyone involved.

 

[iDon]

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad. Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

Always looking for the next one who is better. But really I have met up with a couple of girls who looking nothing like their photo. Still interesting people and spent a few nights hanging out.

I realised I was shopping outside my price range and as soon as I realised that I have had a much more positive and less frustrsting time.

 

[Sublime]

If you're not attracted to them, you're not attracted to them. Shouldn't have to compromise your own standards/tastes to factor in "do they like me too?". That's an instant route to "settling" for someone just to be with someone, and being unhappy, which isn't really fair on anyone involved.

That is very true and i agree with that, but i've seen plenty of guys on tinder saying terrible things about quite attractive girls. Some of these guys aren't any massive prize themselves. Half the time they're more worried about what their mates would say about them being with this person, rather than their own feelings.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad. Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

And girls don't?

Show me a young person actively going after 5s and I'll show you a 4.

 

[Damon_3388]

That is very true and i agree with that, but i've seen plenty of guys on tinder saying terrible things about quite attractive girls. Some of these guys aren't any massive prize themselves. Half the time they're more worried about what their mates would say about them being with this person, rather than their own feelings.

Well deep down, those guys probably do have some sort of self-confidence issues, if they can't be with someone they like without worrying what their mates think. That being said, if you genuinely are embarrassed to be seen with them, maybe you're compromising too far.

 

[vealesy]

You said that girl was odd and dull but good looking.

Perhaps one of the so called unattractive ones could be the most fun and interesting people you could ever meet? If you're looking to meet a person you can have a relationship with, it isn't always the complete stunner that's best for you.

Which is what makes Tinders popularity so sad.

 

[vealesy]

Kumbaya. Not gonna happen. You can't see someone you're not attracted to physically, it's just not going to work. Maybe if I was 35 and looking for someone to settle down with, then I'd start to emphasise personality, but when you're 20, who's really going to sleep with an ugly girl with an alright personality? Plus there's plenty of cute girls who are great to hang around with.

You are missing out.

Read about sex. Tantra etc.

"Looks" ranks about 10th on "what attracts me" imo.

You must be very insecure.

 

[Silent Alarm]

You are missing out.

Read about sex. Tantra etc.

"Looks" ranks about 10th on "what attracts me" imo.

You must be very insecure.

Not as insecure as I used to be. But there's nothing ludicrous about going on Tinder and looking for a good looking girl. That is the point of it. There's no shame in being vain. And I understand that looks doesn't correlate to actually being good at sex or working with you sexually – plus, I'd say I'm probably the least 'hot'-obsessed out of all my mates and tend to value other things. But I'm still going to go after someone I find attractive (and a lot of that is the way she looks). I'm not saying anything controversial.

 

[vealesy]

There is shame in being vain.

There is nothing more shameful imo.

 

[radiojake]

I'm not sure why I don't have an issue with the idea of 'internet dating' but Tinder really seems to rub me the wrong way..

For the record I haven't done either...

 

[vealesy]

I'm not sure why I don't have an issue with the idea of 'internet dating' but Tinder really seems to rub me the wrong way..

For the record I haven't done either...

Ive been internet dating since mIRC.

Tinder is the worst one yet.

 

[Taylor]

No issues with Tinder 'ethically' and socially for sex or courting. Plenty of people used the internet to facilitate contact with people. This is probably just an added step of anonymity and initial awkwardness when you meet, but that's not an issue – every first date is a little forced at the start. I remember a thing on ABC about a year ago where they were talking about Tinder. If my middle aged parents can have no qualms about it and find it a good thing, I've no idea how young people can hate it.

The issue I have is that I'm just not the sort to be on there. I have never had any luck on Tinder. The closest I got was some bird coming out with me, but despite being pretty good looking and getting a few macks off her, she was probably the dullest and oddest girl I have ever met (and that's why she was on there I guess). I'm a pretty good texter once I know the girl but I really can't get anything across straight off the bat on there. The girls who tend to like me aren't really huge on Tinder, and at age 20, you get the feeling (don't you, Den?) that a lot of the girls my age have a much wider pool (20-25) whereas the younger you are as a bloke, the smaller pool you have. I've had way more luck going to clubs and picking up.

Most of all though, it makes me feel incredibly lonely. You know when you stay way too late at a club and there's like 40 people there, 30 of them are dudes, and the girls are shockers? It's like that but you're not pissed. Eighteen months ago it had a higher proportion of good looking girls but now there are so many unattractive ones, it just makes me feel sorry for all these people... just an endless list of birds who are getting nothing but want someone.

Older men have a huge range of "potentials". It's us girls who have to lock one down before we get too old.

 

[Scotland]

Compliment sandwich time.

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad.

Bang on.

Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

Everyone does this. No shortage of girls who think Ryan Gosling is going to come along and sweep them away into a Disney fairytale.

If you're not attracted to them, you're not attracted to them.

Bang on.

People who say 'I don't care about looks' or 'I don't care about how much he earns' etc. are full of shit. Certain aspects may not be a deciding factor, but there is a practical limit to everything.

 

[Jesse Custer]

Yeah but perhaps you're shopping outside your price range too? No point wanting to eat at Fat Duck if you've only got enough to eat at La Porchetta. It's easy to swing past a picture of someone and call them ugly when they're really not bad. Guys have such unrealistic expectations with online dating.

So do women though. Some girls refuse to meet you all because a bloke wears fluros to work!

 

[Silent Alarm]

So do women though. Some girls refuse to meet you all because a bloke wears fluros to work!

Good call by the girl tbh

 

[Catfish Alley]

You mean like road/construction workers? What's wrong with that?

 

[Sublime]

So do women though. Some girls refuse to meet you all because a bloke wears fluros to work!

I didn't intend to single out guys sorry, both sides would do it you're right. I'm just talking from what i've seen , as i've only seen guys use the app. What someone thinks they want and what they actually need are often quite different.

 

[Scotland]

I didn't intend to single out guys sorry, both sides would do it you're right. I'm just talking from what i've seen , as i've only seen guys use the app. What someone thinks they want and what they actually need are often quite different.

You could mount a case that women are worse when it comes to pre-judging.

A bloke flicking through pictures of girls is more than likely going to go 'yes, no, yes, no, god no, oh my god marry me, yes, no' etc. Women no doubt do it too.

Women IMO are far more likely to find a picture of a guy they do think is good looking then rule him out for some other reason based on a couple of photos or maybe some words. How many guys that aren't Silent Alarm are going to rule out a girl because they don't like her shoes?

 

[getthefooty]

You said that girl was odd and dull but good looking.

Perhaps one of the so called unattractive ones could be the most fun and interesting people you could ever meet? If you're looking to meet a person you can have a relationship with, it isn't always the complete stunner that's best for you.

That is very true and i agree with that, but i've seen plenty of guys on tinder saying terrible things about quite attractive girls. Some of these guys aren't any massive prize themselves. Half the time they're more worried about what their mates would say about them being with this person, rather than their own feelings.

This is 100% bang on. Call me cynical but I think a lot of guys think that the attractiveness of the girl they are with correlates directly with how they are seen in society or how 'well' they are doing. They want an attractive girlfriend partly because they think it reflects better on themselves, to the extent that even if they are 'attracted' to someone that doesn't necessarily fit into society's typical view of an attractive girl, they won't go for them. This isn't far from the truth in some ways - I think a lot of people do think 'he has an attractive girlfriend, therefore he must be successful.'

Let's be honest - how does having a really hot girlfriend makes things practically better for you? Sure, the sex is probably a bit better, and she's fun to look at, but that's about where it ends for a relationship. If she's not fun and interesting to be around, it's going to get tiresome pretty quickly. And it's the people that don't recognise this and continue to hang around in relationships that are based on looks that end up having the worst time.