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CheapCharlie said:
Do you come across as needy on a date?
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Not really, I come in with pretty low expectations (it's tinder) and just to see what happens. Just so happened we got along on this occasion and it seemed pretty evenly reciprocated.

I'm just an over thinker when it comes to text message land. Fair comment that I am overreacting but I'm getting strong too good to be true vibes, this girl is hot.
 

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Sketi said:
Not really, I come in with pretty low expectations (it's tinder) and just to see what happens. Just so happened we got along on this occasion and it seemed pretty evenly reciprocated.

I'm just an over thinker when it comes to text message land. Fair comment that I am overreacting but I'm getting strong too good to be true vibes, this girl is hot.
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You say its too good to be true because she is hot? No need to put yourself down bud

Hot girls are mind numbingly boring after a month or so. This applies to 90% of initially hot looking girls.
After a month their hotness morphs into average looks due to their lack of depth.
Generally that lack of depth has come about by guys holding them up on a pedestal and they fail to develop an interesting personality or make any great effort in relationships.

She might be doing u a favour by not messaging
 
Sketi said:
Could you give en example or 2 of needy behavior in a date setting?
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A sense u want someone to text back immediately and you worry about it.

An indication that you are over keen. Any first date should be treated as vanilla.
If you fear being ghosted after a date or three with the same person it can come across to them as needy.

Early days of dating should be about keeping your options open and having an attitude of it doesnt work out its okay. Move on meet someone else.
For some reason women prefer a challenge
 
Sketi said:
Wow thread really died. Doubt this will breath much life back into it either:

Anyone else relentlessly over analyse their messages / texts etc when it's to someone you're interested in, and they don't get back to you straight away?

A rare first date last night where I would actually want to pursue this person. All went fairly swimmingly and she brought up seeing each other again at the end and even an idea of what we should do.

I wait til today to text and follow up and try to book something in. No response as of yet and cue the instant over analysing: was I too direct, did I wait long enough, should have played it cooler, could have worded it better etc etc

At the end of the day I guess if she's interested she'll let me know. But the longer I don't hear back the more convinced I am it just won't happen...

/vent
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Dude, you sound a bit psychotic. She hasn't texted you in a few hours? So what?

Maybe she's working, maybe she's shopping, maybe the dinner from last night gave her explosive diarrhea. Just calm down and distract yourself with other things
 
CheapCharlie said:
A sense u want someone to text back immediately and you worry about it.

An indication that you are over keen. Any first date should be treated as vanilla.
If you fear being ghosted after a date or three with the same person it can come across to them as needy.

Early days of dating should be about keeping your options open and having an attitude of it doesnt work out its okay. Move on meet someone else.
For some reason women prefer a challenge
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That's pretty sound advice, cheers.
CheapCharlie said:
You say its too good to be true because she is hot? No need to put yourself down bud

Hot girls are mind numbingly boring after a month or so. This applies to 90% of initially hot looking girls.
After a month their hotness morphs into average looks due to their lack of depth.
Generally that lack of depth has come about by guys holding them up on a pedestal and they fail to develop an interesting personality or make any great effort in relationships.

She might be doing u a favour by not messaging
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To make matters worse she's actually cool and interesting as well. American too which I have kind of a thing for.
 
james Dean said:
Dude, you sound a bit psychotic. She hasn't texted you in a few hours? So what?

Maybe she's working, maybe she's shopping, maybe the dinner from last night gave her explosive diarrhea. Just calm down and distract yourself with other things
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Well this post got more attention than I expected lal. Was just an anxious vent. Psychotic a bit extreme, just an over thinker.

Buuuuut she wrote back. Thanks bigfooty for helping me through this truly harrowing ordeal :tearsofjoy:

There's a lesson in here somewhere... Chill the **** out.
 
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tryitout said:
My man, we've all been there. Met up with a girl once for drinks and she was perfect, the "date" went really well and she was keen to meet up again. Never did see her again :'(
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It's a cruel world for us guys at the moment.

You meet someone for the first time and get home and you find out they have deleted you.

If a guy does that to a girl he gets called a "player" :rolleyes:
 
Sketi said:
I wait til today to text and follow up and try to book something in. No response as of yet and cue the instant over analysing: was I too direct, did I wait long enough, should have played it cooler, could have worded it better etc etc
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you've had a date, she's either keen to see you again or not. unless you're sending her animal pr0n or hitting her with a 'please respond' every 2 minutes then there is nothing you can do over text that is going to swing her on the decision she probably made during the date.
 
Sketi said:
Well this post got more attention than I expected lal. Was just an anxious vent. Psychotic a bit extreme, just an over thinker.

Buuuuut she wrote back. Thanks bigfooty for helping me through this truly harrowing ordeal :tearsofjoy:

There's a lesson in here somewhere... Chill the **** out.
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I hereby dub thee RU_ mk II
 

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Its better to date average looking or slightly below average looking women
They aren't so fawned over, work harder for the relationship and make more effort.
 
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