How about this
I, cammo6556, take you, missus cammo6656 to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may see the crows once again win a flag. As is Sando to His body, the church, so I will be to you a loving and faithful husband. Always will I perform my headship over you even as Tex does over me, knowing that His Lordship is one of the holiest desires for my life. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care except during footy season when the crows are playing or any team for that matter. I promise I will live first unto the Crows rather than others or even you. I promise that I will lead our lives into a life of football and tapatalk and hope that Tippett goes to GWS. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful crows supporter.