Toast Types of people at the footy

[almuz]

The guy who doesn’t understand how sound travels

Usually between the ages of 18-25 and sat the upper tier of the stadium with their mates or a reluctant misso. You’re not sure if he’s taking the piss or just a little unhinged

Approx 10 minutes into the game, starts losing their mind at the either the lack of HTB or hands in the back calls for their team


From level 4 at the MCG they scream with their arms out like Christ the Redeemer, hoping for two miracles 1) the umpires can actually hear them from that distance 2) they will agree with his plea and reverse their decision

 

[BarryMorgan]

The guy who doesn’t understand how sound travels

Usually between the ages of 18-25 and sat the upper tier of the stadium with their mates or a reluctant misso. You’re not sure if he’s taking the piss or just a little unhinged

Approx 10 minutes into the game, starts losing their mind at the either the lack of HTB or hands in the back calls for their team


From level 4 at the MCG they scream with their arms out like Christ the Redeemer, hoping for two miracles 1) the umpires can actually hear them from that distance 2) they will agree with his plea and reverse their decision

The reluctant girlfriend is also a good footy stereotype - borrowed scarf, a look of slight trepidation on her face when she realises that her new beau is completely unhinged and a couple of concerted efforts to reassure him that she’s having a good time when in reality, she’s already thinking about how best to break up with him.

 

[emblurr]

The people who boo the opposition, but view anyone who boos their guys as incredibly disrespectful.

One Collingwood fan on Twitter wrote: “Essendon supporters showing their class yet again by booing another #Anzac Medalist. What a bunch of catatonic losers”.

Another Twitter user wrote: “Bombers supporters. Be classy FFS. Go home”.

Selwood/Pendlebury/Ginnivan?

 

[almuz]

The Aspiring WAGS*

Group of teenage girls all dolled up who seem to hang around in a group and pretend they are WAGs even though they are 15/16 and clearly not WAGs.

They don't pay much attention to the game, but clearly do know what it is going when they tear themselves away from their phones.

* I am an old campaigner now it is quite possible these girls are actually WAGs and 20.

Had a group of Aspiring Wags behind me a few seasons back

Pretty much just chatted about random BS the whole game, sans the occasional cheer when our dreamier players had the footy

The worst part was that late in the game one Asp-Wag loudly said they miss <insert dreamy player here> because he gives the team more ‘oomph’

It was actually a really good point about what the team was lacking. So not only are they there just to look at their phones, they also know more about footy than me/everyone else too.

 

[TassieSaint]

Copped some of these on the weekend.

Genuinely carry on like you asked them to kill their dog for committing the horrible crime of needing to use the toilet at halftime.

Always carry on like their legs are glued to their seat and make it impossible for you to get around them easily.

Absolute knobheads. Genuinely also sit there all game in silence like they aren’t even enjoying the game.

It's funny cause those blokes are also in this thread complaining about people getting up multiple times during the game.

I'm firmly on your side though, what do these dickheads expect you to do, piss in a bottle? Not buy any food or drink just for their convenience so they don't miss 1/8th second of the game whilst you move past?

 

[Soggy2112]

It's funny cause those blokes are also in this thread complaining about people getting up multiple times during the game.

I'm firmly on your side though, what do these dickheads expect you to do, piss in a bottle? Not buy any food or drink just for their convenience so they don't miss 1/8th second of the game whilst you move past?

Lady on my row acts like I’m asking her to give up her child whenever I walk past at a break, yet her husband sits next to me and takes up half my seat and seems to not have an issue with it

 

[Ricky Vaughn]

Selwood/Pendlebury/Ginnivan?

Yeh that's what triggered it for me. They also booed Blicavs when he got injured.

 

[Rabish Binney]

I just avoid all public dunnies full stop.

What about if your absolutely busting for a s**t?

 

[Rabish Binney]

South Australian (and possibly Western Australian) special - The guy who blames every free kick against his side on the 'bloody Victorian umpires', even if we're playing a team like Brisbane or Sydney.

Yep. Pay that one.

 

[Rabish Binney]

Had a guy that stood behind me during the days at Footy Park. He used to go off his head with his catch cry 'just kick it for Christ's sake' against multiple players in pressure situations

Yet as soon as a kick was butchered (for whatever reason) the inevitable 'why the f*&%^% did you kick it? just f*&^% handball for f*&^% sake'

 

[offtherails9]

I don't understand this either, has been permeated by Cal Twomey on the Exchange Podcast a lot as well, as if it's some social faux pas.
I don't personally wear one but it's absolutely ludicrous to lambast people for wearing their teams jersey. People do this all around the world in all sports. I admit the no sleeves gernsey only can be a bit odd, but wearing it over a tshirt - what's the issue? Bunch of no fun losers who criticize it I say.

* me, this is pretty funny really.

You look like this, and yet you think you can judge people for wearing their teams colors at a game? Get a grip and just worry about enjoying the game yourself man..

 

[PP34]

The jumper thing wouldn’t be as bad if the people wearing them at least put a shirt on underneath and maybe tried to look a bit respectable.

Instead the footy jumper is ruined by sleeveless 40 year olds and blokes wearing horrific trackies or hoodies that make them look like they’ve just come from a stay in hospital.

 

[offtherails9]

The jumper thing wouldn’t be as bad if the people wearing them at least put a shirt on underneath and maybe tried to look a bit respectable.

Instead the footy jumper is ruined by sleeveless 40 year olds and blokes wearing horrific trackies or hoodies that make them look like they’ve just come from a stay in hospital.

Haha yeah well that's a bit different hey, don't think they would look too flash with or without the guernsey.

 

[Papa G]

fu** me, this is pretty funny really.

You look like this, and yet you think you can judge people for wearing their teams colors at a game? Get a grip and just worry about enjoying the game yourself man..

Lol. I wonder who'd win in a hand slapping fight between Cal and Gerard Whateley?

 

[Schauermann]

Freo vs Essendon about 2010 or something.

I had the unfortunate situation of sitting behind the stupid old slag who used to bring a giant brass bell and start ringing it every time Peter Bell had a kick or handpass. All friggin day.

I wanted to grab that bell and smash her over the head with it..

The exact year is important here because in 2010 Bell had retired already...

 

[citizen-erased]

The picnicers - rock up to the game with a thermos of tea, another with hotdogs in it, 12 bread rolls, two lap blankets, homemade muffins, sandwiches, a selection of fruit and a change of jumpers. For two people.

Dont bag hot dogs in a thermos.

Also, remember to bring something to get them out. That water is hot for fingers.

 

[Mofra]

Dont bag hot dogs in a thermos.

Also, remember to bring something to get them out. That water is hot for fingers.

I've seen a wooden skewer used which works well for the first one then gets steadily more difficult for each subsequent hot dog.

 

[citizen-erased]

Had the classic on monday.

Every free against collingwood was wrong. Every contest should have been a free for. Every goal was collingwood justice against the umps.
Refreshing it wasnt one of ours for once, but he and the family were relentless.
This was first bounce through to last.

**** i hate people

 

[citizen-erased]

I've seen a wooden skewer used which works well for the first one then gets steadily more difficult for each subsequent hot dog.

I tried mini tongs, but it became a game of operation, with semi boiling hot dog water instead of a buzz.

Fork works when the bag checkers dont confiscate it.

 

[Shane Heard]

The exact year is important here because in 2010 Bell had retired already...

Righto then ..a few years before.

Happy?

 

[Ahern2Boof]

The overly-enthusiastic *heads who get together as a group and watch the footy thinking everyone in their vicinity wants to hear them.

“Jeez fellas how good is this day?! Perfect for footy isn’t it!”

“Oi nah how good was that kick by Bontempelli though? Nah that was bloody elite”

“I’m feeling a bit thirsty, any of you blokes want a few froffies from the bar? Oi who’s shout is it??”

Seem to get stuck with these types of supporters at every game, and the noise they create with their s**t chat is even worse considering North games are usually fairly devoid of atmosphere.

 

[Schauermann]

Righto then ..a few years before.

Happy?

Was just asking out of interest. For this thread it would have been a better story when Bell had allready retired.

 

[Halloween Jack]

Captain Obvious. * The guys who make comments trying to sound smart and knowledgeable about the game but really are just pointing out the obvious.

Example, I was sitting in front of a couple of Captain Obvious's at Cats v Bombers Round 1 this year. Around half way through the second quarter and the Bombers down by about 40 points overheard this beauty of a conversation.

"Gee the Bombers are in a bit of trouble here"
"yeah, but if they get the next 4 goals and go into half time only 16 points down I reckon they are still a chance"
"true, but if the Cats get the next 4 I think it's game over"
"yep. If you are going to be 40 points down it's better to happen in the in the second quarter, as there is still enough time to make up the difference. If you're 40 points down in the last, it's too late to make up the difference"


* Also known as some Channel 7 commentators.

 

[Blackhawk42]

They young guy who plays suburban/country footy and is taking his new girlfriend to her first game ever. He's decked her out in the colours of the team he supports because, being so early in the relationship, she's happy to go along with it.

Even when she doesn't ask questions about specific things such as rules or which players are the ones to watch, the young guy will attempt to show off his knowledge of the game by suggesting what players could have done in certain moments (or what he would have done himself).

She has no idea if her new love interest was close to playing at the top level or so far from it that his 'knowledge of the game' was all made up on the spot because at the beginning she didn't know any better.

You hear him throughout the whole game and as much as you'd like to respond to all the crap he's spewing, you're also not about to stand in the way of young love.

 

[Shane Heard]

Was just asking out of interest. For this thread it would have been a better story when Bell had allready retired.

Roger that