Toast Vale Danny Frawley.

George

Moderator
Aug 17, 2015
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From the club;

Hi George,

Thank you very much for your support and well wishes at this difficult time. Danny meant a lot to the Saints and to a great many people, and words can't express the enormity of his impact and the countless lives he touched.

Everyone is welcome to come to RSEA Park at any time to leave tributes and see the club museum which has been dedicated in his honour. Any messages of support can be sent to reception@saints.com.au.

From our family to yours, thank you.
 

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CHBench

Norm Smith Medallist
Jan 20, 2008
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he was stkilda. we have bugger all trophies or anything to celebrate as far as winning but we have people like Danny Frawley . people who are winners themselves and elevate themselves higher despite not having medals or trophies but through their character and resilience .
I think you have just put into words and help me process why his death has completely devastated me and all of us. We don't love the club for it's success (obviously), we love the club for the players, the people, the identity. Indeed, he was St Kilda.

He did wonderful work in raising awareness of mental health, I hope all those who are touched by his passing take the opportunity to carry on with his legacy.
 

MOLTEN GANGLANDS

Club Legend
Jun 4, 2018
1,532
5,158
AFL Club
St Kilda
suicide trigger warning* if people aren't comfortable about me assuming/talking about this then I'm sorry but I think it needs addressing

firstly terrible news, especially for his wife and daughters. Sounds like he was going through a really tough patch. As someone that gets those strange feelings associated with birthdays and new years eve (there's a marked increase in suicides around these times), to add that on top of what he was already going through... I hope that anyone reading or thinking about this kind of stuff remembers that these feelings come in waves, and if you can hold out until the wave breaks and begins to recede then things will get better. Only around ten percent of people who attempt suicide actually go on to suicide (using the word 'commit' infers a level of guilt), so if you can get through it there's a very, very good chance that things will get better.

I never got to see Danny play as I was too young and living in NSW, so what I knew of him was largely through his work in the media. But it goes without saying he seemed to possess a massive heart, he was an honest entertainer, not worried about his ego or 'being right', he was more concerned with making people happy, which speaks to his fundamentally caring nature. His legacy will be in helping Australian 'Men' (as in, the way we think a man should be) realise it's ok and actually a sign of inner strength to show and embrace vulnerability.

It is natural after these things happen to think about the concept as a whole, but if you are worrying about the way you feel call lifeline on 13 11 14, even just for a chat
 
Last edited:

Drake Huggins

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May 2, 2018
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suicide trigger warning* if people aren't comfortable about me assuming/talking about this then I'm sorry but I think it needs addressing

firstly terrible news, especially for his wife and daughters. Sounds like he was going through a really tough patch. As someone that gets those strange feelings associated with birthdays and new years eve (there's a marked increase in suicides around these times), to add that on top of what he was already going through... I hope that anyone reading or thinking about this kind of stuff remembers that these feelings come in waves, and if you can hold out until the wave breaks and begins to recede then things will get better. Only around ten percent of people who attempt suicide actually go on to suicide (using the word 'commit' infers a level of guilt), so if you can get through it there's a very, very good chance that things will get better.

I never got to see Danny play as I was too young and living in NSW, so what I knew of him was largely through his work in the media. But it goes without saying he seemed to possess a massive heart, he was an honest entertainer, not worried about his ego or 'being right', he was more concerned with making people happy, which speaks to his fundamentally caring nature. His legacy will be helping Australian 'Men' (as in, the way we think a man should be) realise it's ok and actually a sign of inner strength to show and embrace vulnerability.

It is natural after these things happen to think about the concept as a whole, but if you are worrying about the way you feel call lifeline on 13 11 14, even just for a chat.
I endorse your post wholehearedly, MG, especially while wearing my mental health professional's hat. It is so important to note what you mentioned about waves. We all have our down times. As the first noble truth of Buddhism tells us, "Life involves suffering". My favourite saying is things are never quite as good or bad as they seem.

As per your message, MG. The next important thing is to reach out. To anyone. There needs to be some sort of intervention and interference to divert the thought processes. Help is always at hand these days, but you need the courage to admit you've become helpless.

Having dealt with my own demons, I can assure you most suicidal people don't necessarily want to die. They simply don't want to live anymore. They want the pain of their situation to change. For that, you need the help of others.

You would think that Danny Frawley had everything to live for. A beautiful family, adored by friends, colleagues and strangers, fame and wealth. The thing that is
so awful about this illness, is it strips you of all self esteem and most importantly, hope. You feel like a burden to all, even your loved ones.

Then it takes your cognitive faculties. Rational thinking disappears, replaced by disorganised, irrational thoughts and impulsive actions.

There is hope. Many recover. Only a small percentage of attempters, complete the act. The vast majority of those who survive, regret their actions and the act is used as a nadir in their lives that helps launch the recovery process.

Harking back to my copper days, I am now of an age where I'm losing former colleagues. Seven to suicide in the past twenty months. Two more have died of cancer, at 57 and 62. All, I've no doubt the result of a dreadfully stressful job and a toxic organisational culture.

Please look after yourselves. That's the best thing you can do to honour Danny's memory.

Take care,
Drake Huggins.
 

MOLTEN GANGLANDS

Club Legend
Jun 4, 2018
1,532
5,158
AFL Club
St Kilda
I endorse your post wholehearedly, MG, especially while wearing my mental health professional's hat. It is so important to note what you mentioned about waves. We all have our down times. As the first noble truth of Buddhism tells us, "Life involves suffering". My favourite saying is things are never quite as good or bad as they seem.

As per your message, MG. The next important thing is to reach out. To anyone. There needs to be some sort of intervention and interference to divert the thought processes. Help is always at hand these days, but you need the courage to admit you've become helpless.

Having dealt with my own demons, I can assure you most suicidal people don't necessarily want to die. They simply don't want to live anymore. They want the pain of their situation to change. For that, you need the help of others.

You would think that Danny Frawley had everything to live for. A beautiful family, adored by friends, colleagues and strangers, fame and wealth. The thing that is
so awful about this illness, is it strips you of all self esteem and most importantly, hope. You feel like a burden to all, even your loved ones.

Then it takes your cognitive faculties. Rational thinking disappears, replaced by disorganised, irrational thoughts and impulsive actions.

There is hope. Many recover. Only a small percentage of attempters, complete the act. The vast majority of those who survive, regret their actions and the act is used as a nadir in their lives that helps launch the recovery process.

Harking back to my copper days, I am now of an age where I'm losing former colleagues. Seven to suicide in the past twenty months. Two more have died of cancer, at 57 and 62. All, I've no doubt the result of a dreadfully stressful job and a toxic organisational culture.

Please look after yourselves. That's the best thing you can do to honour Danny's memory.

Take care,
Drake Huggins.
great post Huggins, sorry to hear about the passing of your former colleagues, hopefully the dialogue that will be unearthed in the wake of Danny's passing will help to mitigate future suicide attempts across all of australia

♥ to use all
 

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Catters 070911

Club Legend
Suspended
Oct 13, 2017
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Hi guys,

I know when an opposition supporter comes on a team's boards, the mods get nervous and have the button ready, in case of trolling.

But I thought I would drop in here and give my condolences for the loss of your champion, Danny Frawley.

St. Kilda is a team I have a lot of time for. I felt that you were generally good sports after the 2009 flag, and some of you shook hands with me and other Geelong supporters, congratulating us for winning the flag (some teams could learn from your humility).

Anyway, sad to hear about Spud. Funny, the word "spud" on BigFooty usually means a useless player, but Frawley was the antithesis of that. He was a champion, and probably should have been in the conversation for full-back for "Team Of The Century" (at least he was a "true" full-back, unlike Silvagni, who played up forward a bit).

I didn't know him, or have ever met him, but he seemed like a genuine bloke.

I always think it is poor when someone dies, and people were generally hating on them when they were alive, and had nothing nice to say, but then laud them in death, and say the nice things they never said when they were alive. I find it hypocrisy.

However, that wasn't the case with "Spud". I haven't heard a bad word about him, and what people are saying now about him matches what they said about him when he was here. People don't have to scratch to find something good to say.

I feel for his wife and daughters as well. I have lost my father (though, not as tragic a way as they have), so I can empathise. I know the feeling that there is a hole in your life now which will never be truly filled. All you have is memories, and what he would say here, or do there, but it helps to remember what you love about him.

One concern I have is the talk of suicide. I know Spud had his problems, and it was a single car, but there could be plenty of reasons- speed, drowiness, alcohol, maybe a bad country road, he may have hit something on the road, health problem, etc. It could be anything. I think we should wait for the crash investigators and the coroner to decide, before jumping to conclusions. I hope it was just an unfortunate accident, and not his "demons" again. I would like to think that he was happy, and didn't suffer.

So, I just thought that I would drop by and say that. I hope your team does well next year. Having Brett Ratten will help, and he can help the players in this time, as he knows loss himself. He can be there for them, and the team could play with "Spud" spirit next year.

Also, take your time, and grieve at your own pace. Don't let anyone tell you when you should be "over it".

Cheers.
 

CaptainRisky

Premium Platinum
Oct 16, 2016
2,802
5,116
Melbourne CBD
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I met Danny once when I was a kid. Ever since I felt like I have known him personally. Watching him and listening to him every week. Always put a smile on my face.

Enjoying listening to all the tributes on SEN this morning. Seems like I'm not alone in my thoughts.
I loved listening to them and reading the posts here although its a tad upsetting i must say :'(
 

Joffaboy

Hall of Famer
Dec 4, 2000
34,461
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Hi All

Will post only on this occasion as extra ordinary circumstances.

First off, this Thursday is RUOK day, a timely reminder to look around and don't be afraid to ask someone if you have doubts.
Secondly I have no problems with discussions on mental health and suicide triggers, however we need to be mindful that this incident will be in the hands of the coroner to determine cause of death.

I am sure there are suspicions but I dont know if it helps to circumvent the coroner's future findings with supposition.

Thought Kennett was way out of line.

Anyway, a tough period for the Saints family, and a devastating loss for the Frawley family and his friends.

RIP skipper.
 

CALL ME SNAKE

Brownlow Medallist
Apr 19, 2014
12,229
39,871
usually in Dan Murphy's
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Brilliant posts, Drake and Molten.

Had to be said.
Yeah agree :thumbsu:
both very informative posts about a subject some still find hard to talk about.
Depending on his headspace Danny may not have realised just how loved he was.
But due to this outpouring of emotion from the wider football community, media and the general public I think his daughters will know exactly just how much a loved and respected man their Dad was.
 

VDS66

Brownlow Medallist
Oct 4, 2011
21,166
54,857
AFL Club
St Kilda
Hi guys,

I know when an opposition supporter comes on a team's boards, the mods get nervous and have the button ready, in case of trolling.

But I thought I would drop in here and give my condolences for the loss of your champion, Danny Frawley.

St. Kilda is a team I have a lot of time for. I felt that you were generally good sports after the 2009 flag, and some of you shook hands with me and other Geelong supporters, congratulating us for winning the flag (some teams could learn from your humility).

Anyway, sad to hear about Spud. Funny, the word "spud" on BigFooty usually means a useless player, but Frawley was the antithesis of that. He was a champion, and probably should have been in the conversation for full-back for "Team Of The Century" (at least he was a "true" full-back, unlike Silvagni, who played up forward a bit).

I didn't know him, or have ever met him, but he seemed like a genuine bloke.

I always think it is poor when someone dies, and people were generally hating on them when they were alive, and had nothing nice to say, but then laud them in death, and say the nice things they never said when they were alive. I find it hypocrisy.

However, that wasn't the case with "Spud". I haven't heard a bad word about him, and what people are saying now about him matches what they said about him when he was here. People don't have to scratch to find something good to say.

I feel for his wife and daughters as well. I have lost my father (though, not as tragic a way as they have), so I can empathise. I know the feeling that there is a hole in your life now which will never be truly filled. All you have is memories, and what he would say here, or do there, but it helps to remember what you love about him.

One concern I have is the talk of suicide. I know Spud had his problems, and it was a single car, but there could be plenty of reasons- speed, drowiness, alcohol, maybe a bad country road, he may have hit something on the road, health problem, etc. It could be anything. I think we should wait for the crash investigators and the coroner to decide, before jumping to conclusions. I hope it was just an unfortunate accident, and not his "demons" again. I would like to think that he was happy, and didn't suffer.

So, I just thought that I would drop by and say that. I hope your team does well next year. Having Brett Ratten will help, and he can help the players in this time, as he knows loss himself. He can be there for them, and the team could play with "Spud" spirit next year.

Also, take your time, and grieve at your own pace. Don't let anyone tell you when you should be "over it".

Cheers.
Thanks for stopping by. Terrific post, or as Spud would say... Triffic post.

I totally agree about waiting for the coroner's verdict.
 

Blue Heart

Club Legend
Sep 21, 2011
1,141
699
AFL Club
Carlton
was very sad about this all afternoon and into today. got worse when I was telling my guys at work just who he was. he was stkilda. we have bugger all trophies or anything to celebrate as far as winning but we have people like Danny Frawley . people who are winners themselves and elevate themselves higher despite not having medals or trophies but through their character and resilience . my god if the way it is being reported ( which I think is terrible especially the channel 9 show last night) is true then I feel terrible for how Danny must have felt. I met Danny once last year with my kids as we were leaving the club and as we were walking out the glass front door Danny came past. we were introduced to him shook his hand and I asked my boys do you recognise this bloke. they said yeah from the tv. I said yes but also he was captain for 177 games and much more than the bloke on tv. sadly those very glass doors are the same where the memorial is now set up.

I don't care if we don't win another flag as long as we continue to have heroes like Spud and Barks .

every year someone gets a cup. not everyone has a Spud or Barks

we are stkilda

RIP DANNY THANK YOU

Beautifully said !!!
 

Kappa

Brownlow Medallist
Oct 7, 2014
16,865
19,819
AFL Club
Collingwood
I endorse your post wholehearedly, MG, especially while wearing my mental health professional's hat. It is so important to note what you mentioned about waves. We all have our down times. As the first noble truth of Buddhism tells us, "Life involves suffering". My favourite saying is things are never quite as good or bad as they seem.

As per your message, MG. The next important thing is to reach out. To anyone. There needs to be some sort of intervention and interference to divert the thought processes. Help is always at hand these days, but you need the courage to admit you've become helpless.

Having dealt with my own demons, I can assure you most suicidal people don't necessarily want to die. They simply don't want to live anymore. They want the pain of their situation to change. For that, you need the help of others.

You would think that Danny Frawley had everything to live for. A beautiful family, adored by friends, colleagues and strangers, fame and wealth. The thing that is
so awful about this illness, is it strips you of all self esteem and most importantly, hope. You feel like a burden to all, even your loved ones.

Then it takes your cognitive faculties. Rational thinking disappears, replaced by disorganised, irrational thoughts and impulsive actions.

There is hope. Many recover. Only a small percentage of attempters, complete the act. The vast majority of those who survive, regret their actions and the act is used as a nadir in their lives that helps launch the recovery process.

Harking back to my copper days, I am now of an age where I'm losing former colleagues. Seven to suicide in the past twenty months. Two more have died of cancer, at 57 and 62. All, I've no doubt the result of a dreadfully stressful job and a toxic organisational culture.

Please look after yourselves. That's the best thing you can do to honour Danny's memory.

Take care,
Drake Huggins.
I think what's being reported if he didn't have it all, his marriage was broken and he was in financial ruin. Either one can wreck a man, he had both while still dealing with serious depression.
 

CaptainRisky

Premium Platinum
Oct 16, 2016
2,802
5,116
Melbourne CBD
AFL Club
St Kilda
Hi All

Will post only on this occasion as extra ordinary circumstances.

First off, this Thursday is RUOK day, a timely reminder to look around and don't be afraid to ask someone if you have doubts.
Secondly I have no problems with discussions on mental health and suicide triggers, however we need to be mindful that this incident will be in the hands of the coroner to determine cause of death.

I am sure there are suspicions but I dont know if it helps to circumvent the coroner's future findings with supposition.

Thought Kennett was way out of line.

Anyway, a tough period for the Saints family, and a devastating loss for the Frawley family and his friends.

RIP skipper.
Unfortunately as someone who grew up in the area where the tragedy occurred and knowing that road its highly unlikely that it will be determined as a road accident , F--k we need to make sure we look after each other , im sick of these things happening its too upsetting for everyone
 

Brains Trust66

Norm Smith Medallist
Oct 31, 2016
7,275
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Victoria
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Hi guys,

I know when an opposition supporter comes on a team's boards, the mods get nervous and have the button ready, in case of trolling.

But I thought I would drop in here and give my condolences for the loss of your champion, Danny Frawley.

St. Kilda is a team I have a lot of time for. I felt that you were generally good sports after the 2009 flag, and some of you shook hands with me and other Geelong supporters, congratulating us for winning the flag (some teams could learn from your humility).

Anyway, sad to hear about Spud. Funny, the word "spud" on BigFooty usually means a useless player, but Frawley was the antithesis of that. He was a champion, and probably should have been in the conversation for full-back for "Team Of The Century" (at least he was a "true" full-back, unlike Silvagni, who played up forward a bit).

I didn't know him, or have ever met him, but he seemed like a genuine bloke.

I always think it is poor when someone dies, and people were generally hating on them when they were alive, and had nothing nice to say, but then laud them in death, and say the nice things they never said when they were alive. I find it hypocrisy.

However, that wasn't the case with "Spud". I haven't heard a bad word about him, and what people are saying now about him matches what they said about him when he was here. People don't have to scratch to find something good to say.

I feel for his wife and daughters as well. I have lost my father (though, not as tragic a way as they have), so I can empathise. I know the feeling that there is a hole in your life now which will never be truly filled. All you have is memories, and what he would say here, or do there, but it helps to remember what you love about him.

One concern I have is the talk of suicide. I know Spud had his problems, and it was a single car, but there could be plenty of reasons- speed, drowiness, alcohol, maybe a bad country road, he may have hit something on the road, health problem, etc. It could be anything. I think we should wait for the crash investigators and the coroner to decide, before jumping to conclusions. I hope it was just an unfortunate accident, and not his "demons" again. I would like to think that he was happy, and didn't suffer.

So, I just thought that I would drop by and say that. I hope your team does well next year. Having Brett Ratten will help, and he can help the players in this time, as he knows loss himself. He can be there for them, and the team could play with "Spud" spirit next year.

Also, take your time, and grieve at your own pace. Don't let anyone tell you when you should be "over it".

Cheers.
Thanks mate , and well said .
 

Plugger35

The umpires are always right!
Sep 27, 2008
97,207
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AFL Club
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was very sad about this all afternoon and into today. got worse when I was telling my guys at work just who he was. he was stkilda. we have bugger all trophies or anything to celebrate as far as winning but we have people like Danny Frawley . people who are winners themselves and elevate themselves higher despite not having medals or trophies but through their character and resilience . my god if the way it is being reported ( which I think is terrible especially the channel 9 show last night) is true then I feel terrible for how Danny must have felt. I met Danny once last year with my kids as we were leaving the club and as we were walking out the glass front door Danny came past. we were introduced to him shook his hand and I asked my boys do you recognise this bloke. they said yeah from the tv. I said yes but also he was captain for 177 games and much more than the bloke on tv. sadly those very glass doors are the same where the memorial is now set up.

I don't care if we don't win another flag as long as we continue to have heroes like Spud and Barks .

every year someone gets a cup. not everyone has a Spud or Barks

we are stkilda

RIP DANNY THANK YOU
Well said, the reason I chose to support St Kilda 30 odd years ago was because of players like Danny Frawley and the spirit and heart he displayed.

If I only chose to support a club based on premiership success I probably would have chosen to support a club like Hawthorn, Essendon or Carlton.

In Danny's time as captain we didn't enjoy premiership success but we went from perennial cellar dwellars to a competitive team that played finals, he helped set standards at the club that lasted for the next couple of decades where we played finals on a regular basis so we have a lot to thank him for.
 

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