News Vale John McCarthy

[Peck]

It goes to show how fragile humans are. What a shit way to go.

 

[Portmanteau]

Allright I'm gonna sound like a prick here, but firstly what is with this side by side shit and secondly, why did the Bulldogs players cut off their holiday and return home?

The Side by Side stuff is just annoying but on the second point about the Bulldogs, I am truley perplexed. I'm sure hardly any of their players actually knew McCarthy personally so was this done under some misguided sense of doing the right thing or showing Respect? People die every day, life does go on, do people have to put their lives on hold for someone they barely know??

Now before anyone has a go at me, I have been in the situation the Port players are in in now. It is nearly 15 years to the day that my best mate was killed by a hit run driver in London, on his 24th birthday. I was the one who got a knock on the door from the Police to inform me what had happened, I was the one who had to identify the body, I was the one who had to ring his parents half a world away and tell them what had happened. It was a tough time and I was close to it, but I guess my point is that life does go on. The easiest thing for me to do was pack up and come home. I didn't.

The out pouring of grief is generally heart felt and well meaning but I really feel some of it is misplaced.

Side by side is obvious, there is some solidarity between Collingwood and Port fans over a player they have both lost. Nothing too over the top...

The point with the WB and Essendon players is 1. I'm sure they didn't 'barely' know each other. AFL players run in the same circles all the time, it's the nature of the competition where players hang out with opponents outside of footy or know them from elsewhere. Jarrad Grant for instance seemed to be tight with McCarthy. Or see Gablett with our boys last year.

2. For the aforementioned reasons, I'm sure a lot of the players didn't feel like partying in the same area. They are not 'getting on with their lives' because they are on holiday, it's not their usual day-to-day lives. It's pretty obvious IMO why some would pare down their holiday plans at the very least.

 

[Honeyboy Wilson]

Allright I'm gonna sound like a prick here, but firstly what is with this side by side shit and secondly, why did the Bulldogs players cut off their holiday and return home?

The Side by Side stuff is just annoying but on the second point about the Bulldogs, I am truley perplexed. I'm sure hardly any of their players actually knew McCarthy personally so was this done under some misguided sense of doing the right thing or showing Respect? People die every day, life does go on, do people have to put their lives on hold for someone they barely know??

Now before anyone has a go at me, I have been in the situation the Port players are in in now. It is nearly 15 years to the day that my best mate was killed by a hit run driver in London, on his 24th birthday. I was the one who got a knock on the door from the Police to inform me what had happened, I was the one who had to identify the body, I was the one who had to ring his parents half a world away and tell them what had happened. It was a tough time and I was close to it, but I guess my point is that life does go on. The easiest thing for me to do was pack up and come home. I didn't.

The out pouring of grief is generally heart felt and well meaning but I really feel some of it is misplaced.

You're placing a blanket view of grief over everyone, just because that was the way you experienced it. The Bulldogs players were partying with the Port boys when it happened, so obviously they will have been deeply affected by the news as well. Yes, you do sound like a prick.

 

[Jumbo]

Side by side

 

[Eddie Dingle]

Papa G, you made choices and the Dogs players made a choice. Who is to say who is right and who is wrong? Certainly not you.

Yes you do sound like a prick or you just need a hug because this has dredged up bad feelings for you?

Either way, Side by Side - We Are Port Adelaide.

 

[WhyAlwaysMe]

Excellent article, Caro.

 

[MrMeaner]

Who are we to say how people should react to the news?

 

[Janey]

That Wilson article is probably the best article shes ever written.

At least there is closure now about what occured.

It's an excellent article. It's informative, honest and respectful.

It also highlights something else for me - if there is anything at all positive to come from this, I am incredibly proud of the way my Club, and everyone associated with it, has handled the whole incident. Led by KT, it has been handled with compassion, dignity and professionalism. The way they are looking after the welfare of the player's appears to be fantastic, with a lot of credit probably due to Stuey Cochrane and his wife as well.

We are Port Adelaide.

 

[RussellEbertHandball]

Allright I'm gonna sound like a prick here, but firstly what is with this side by side shit and secondly, why did the Bulldogs players cut off their holiday and return home?

The Side by Side stuff is just annoying but on the second point about the Bulldogs, I am truley perplexed. I'm sure hardly any of their players actually knew McCarthy personally so was this done under some misguided sense of doing the right thing or showing Respect? People die every day, life does go on, do people have to put their lives on hold for someone they barely know??

......

Everybody grieves differently. So someone puts up side by side - so ****en what? Do you bag someone if they cry at a funeral? Or do you bag them if they don't? There are no rules about how people grieve. Well maybe in North Korea you have to grieve a certain way for the death of the dear leader.

Don't you reckon that LV wouldn't be swarming with Aussie journo's wanting everyday to talk to Bulldog players about their thoughts about the death, why they have stuck around, Aussie journo's ringing them and asking if they are doing the right thing by staying?? There are certain connotations about LV and because this death is mysterious. Plus the whole recreational drugs issue hangs over footballers and end of season trips. I would have jumped on a plane to San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Vancouver, Banff or New York not come home if I was a bulldogs player, but then again I have been there and know those places well. Maybe most young bulldog guys had never been to the USA before or if they have only know LA and LV.

Also you and I aren't part of the brotherhood so we aren't going to think like players. They may feel they need to be seen to show solidarity.

You really should try to do what Atticus Finch said to Scout in To Kill a Monkingbird - You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

 

[Jonts]

Its an online signiture, not big deal

Just seen my relief teacher tear up at the thought of him

Was good mates with him suddenly got a lot realer

 

[King_Tredrea]

Papa G I'm sorry about what you experienced but it doesn't give you the right to tell people they are being over the top. This is a tragedy that's close to everyone in the communities hearts, whether we knew John or not.

 

[MrMeaner]

You really should try to do what Atticus Finch said to Scout in To Kill a Monkingbird - You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

That is one of my favourite lines from the book and movie. A lot of problems could be solved by taking that approach.

 

[Eddie Dingle]

You know in reality we are still a small suburban footy club, a community club. Maybe this is why "our" family are taking it so hard? Maybe this is why we have looked to our Collingwood "brethren" to share our grief? Whatever it is I have no problem with the way anyone associated with our football club is dealing with Johns death.

In fact I am incredibly proud of how everyone from KT to TSW have handled themselves.

We are a small suburban footy club, a family, We Are Port Adelaide.

 

[Jonts]

Personally i don't understand how you can act like you lost someone you knew if you didn't actually know them, but i'm not going to sledge guys that do

 

[Bell Ringer]

Everybody grieves differently. So someone puts up side by side - so ****en what? Do you bag someone if they cry at a funeral? Or do you bag them if they don't? There are no rules about how people grieve. Well maybe in North Korea you have to grieve a certain way for the death of the dear leader.

Don't you reckon that LV wouldn't be swarming with Aussie journo's wanting everyday to talk to Bulldog players about their thoughts about the death, why they have stuck around, Aussie journo's ringing them and asking if they are doing the right thing by staying?? There are certain connotations about LV and because this death is mysterious. Plus the whole recreational drugs issue hangs over footballers and end of season trips. I would have jumped on a plane to San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Vancouver, Banff or New York not come home if I was a bulldogs player, but then again I have been there and know those places well. Maybe most young bulldog guys had never been to the USA before or if they have only know LA and LV.

Also you and I aren't part of the brotherhood so we aren't going to think like players. They may feel they need to be seen to show solidarity.

You really should try to do what Atticus Finch said to Scout in To Kill a Monkingbird - You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

Additionally, if pics of the WB guys partying in Vegas post JMac's death hit twitter or fb, shit would hit the fan.

 

[kaysee]

Not sure if yet appropriate but... law suit?

- unexplained unlocked door to a restricted roof top.. that is used by staff for a smoking area.
- 20cm retaining wall surrounding the area.

Obviously he was UTI... still the area does sound like a safe work place nor a safe accessible space for hotel patrons.

 

[Papa G]

You really should try to do what Atticus Finch said to Scout in To Kill a Monkingbird - You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

With all due respect the REH, I think as I have explained in my previous post, I have been in a very similar situation to what the players now find themselves in. I understand the port players coming home and I have no issue with that, in fact if my suspicions are right, apart from the grief which is no doubt huge, I have a feeling there may be other issues arising. But that is a different story.

Just questioning whether everybody else's world has to stop because of it and whether being seen to be doing the right thing is the primary motivation.

Many people here obviously don't agree with me and think I'm a campaigner for bringing it up, but so be it.

 

[RussellEbertHandball]

Personally i don't understand how you can act like you lost someone you knew if you didn't actually know them, but i'm not going to sledge guys that do

Whose your favourite musican? Have he/she/they provided the soundtrack to your life? Are they still alive? If he/she/they died tomorrow do you reckon you would have an emotional connection eventhough you have never meet he/she/them and that you would feel sad and think I'm going to miss him/her?

 

[Jumbo]

I've got a feeling that this thread is about to move away from a place of respect/mourning of JMac to being about individuals morals/beliefs. Please keep it as a shirne to John and other stuff can be posted at a seperate thread.

 

[Forzaport]

Looks like it has legs:

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/sport...ath-in-las-vegas/story-e6frecjc-1226470914423

Seems like the most logical theory so far. If any player dared him to do it, I don't even want to begin to think how that player would be feeling.

 

[BIG MATTY T]

I've got a feeling that this thread is about to move away from a place of respect/mourning of JMac to being about individuals morals/beliefs. Please keep it as a shirne to John and other stuff can be posted at a seperate thread.

5 stages of grieving or is 4 others just deal with it in different ways

 

[Natman]

Allright I'm gonna sound like a prick here, but firstly what is with this side by side shit and secondly, why did the Bulldogs players cut off their holiday and return home?

The Side by Side stuff is just annoying but on the second point about the Bulldogs, I am truley perplexed. I'm sure hardly any of their players actually knew McCarthy personally so was this done under some misguided sense of doing the right thing or showing Respect? People die every day, life does go on, do people have to put their lives on hold for someone they barely know??

Now before anyone has a go at me, I have been in the situation the Port players are in in now. It is nearly 15 years to the day that my best mate was killed by a hit run driver in London, on his 24th birthday. I was the one who got a knock on the door from the Police to inform me what had happened, I was the one who had to identify the body, I was the one who had to ring his parents half a world away and tell them what had happened. It was a tough time and I was close to it, but I guess my point is that life does go on. The easiest thing for me to do was pack up and come home. I didn't.

The out pouring of grief is generally heart felt and well meaning but I really feel some of it is misplaced.

I dislike this post as much as anything I have read on this board. You have no right to dictate how people in grief should deal with it.
If you want to know why certain people did certain things, ask them.

 

[Geoffa32]

Everybody grieves differently. So someone puts up side by side - so ****en what? Do you bag someone if they cry at a funeral? Or do you bag them if they don't? There are no rules about how people grieve. Well maybe in North Korea you have to grieve a certain way for the death of the dear leader.

Don't you reckon that LV wouldn't be swarming with Aussie journo's wanting everyday to talk to Bulldog players about their thoughts about the death, why they have stuck around, Aussie journo's ringing them and asking if they are doing the right thing by staying?? There are certain connotations about LV and because this death is mysterious. Plus the whole recreational drugs issue hangs over footballers and end of season trips. I would have jumped on a plane to San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Vancouver, Banff or New York not come home if I was a bulldogs player, but then again I have been there and know those places well. Maybe most young bulldog guys had never been to the USA before or if they have only know LA and LV.

Also you and I aren't part of the brotherhood so we aren't going to think like players. They may feel they need to be seen to show solidarity.

You really should try to do what Atticus Finch said to Scout in To Kill a Monkingbird - You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

You may also consider that a few of the Bulldogs probably knew him. Once knowing what happened did not feel like being there anymore, lost the urge to "party on".

Before being drafted most players pretty much develop together via underage club games, underage state games, Draft Camp/Combine and all the functions associated with that. Most players in the draft year would know each other in some capacity. They spend a lot of time together before being drafted.

Playing for AFL club X does not mean you don't have good mates at AFL club Y. Particularly if said player played for more than one club.

It is very likely a few of the players from the Bulldgos knew John reasonably well.

 

[Eddie Dingle]

Seems like the most logical theory so far. If any player dared him to do it, I don't even want to begin to think how that player would be feeling.

None of the other players were with him anywhere near that hotel?

 

[Jonts]

Whose your favourite musican? Have he/she/they provided the soundtrack to your life? Are they still alive? If he/she/they died tomorrow do you reckon you would have an emotional connection eventhough you have never meet he/she/them and that you would feel sad and think I'm going to miss him/her?

Cold Chisel. No. Yes. I would be saddend to a certain extent, but i've never met them personally, so i don't think it will be the same, i've lost mates in car crashes that hurts. THis is a lot lesser feeling