Think Tank Which club has the all-time spud 22?

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HAPPY CHEFFY said:
lol he’s just desperate to take a swipe at the Cats because his an00s has been completely prolapsed by the 2022 premiership and Colin Carter.

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DanWA said:
Rory Lobb dragged Cockburn to finals and a finals win in 2022 and he somehow makes this list?

You don't football very good
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He's named as the ruck, Hugh Dixon is worse but not over 200cm.

I recon we can wait for WC's team to be announced on Thursday to save you time making one.
 
Purple Suit said:
He's named as the ruck, Hugh Dixon is worse but not over 200cm.

I recon we can wait for WC's team to be announced on Thursday to save you time making one.
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Why would you not put Meek in there over Rory?
 
DanWA said:
Why would you not put Meek in there over Rory?
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Meek would be your No. 1 ruck. You tried to get him last trade period but he picked the Hawks. He's also young, so improving. Lobb is as soft as butter and not a ruck's a-hole for someone who is so tall and athletic.
 
Purple Suit said:
Meek would be your No. 1 ruck. You tried to get him last trade period but he picked the Hawks. He's also young, so improving. Lobb is as soft as butter and not a ruck's a-hole for someone who is so tall and athletic.
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We have AA Nic Nat
What a steal by Hawks to get Meek away from that toxic environment
 
philohk said:
Hey baybes. As I’m sure you’re all aware, the mighty Hawks are currently on their inexorable rise to another dynasty. But in all honesty, that might be several months away and we’re a bit rubbish at the moment.

And it got me thinking: who’d make our all-time* spud team? But more than that: would our spud team be so spudly that it would lose to everyone else’s spud team?

Creating this team was a challenge I took on with alacrity for about half an hour. But I think it’s a winner (loser). A few highlights:

Play starts at the bounce, where Simon Crawshay will be easily outpointed by whoever your ruckman is. Doesn’t really matter. He’s no better around the ground, with a footy brain matched only by his physique.

If the ball hits the deck rather than being put down your mids’ throats, it’s ready to be overrun and fumbled by a devastating combination of Brett ‘Pagan-era Carlton’ Johnson, Jono ‘apparently number two draft pick’ O’Rourke and our captain, Rayden ‘163 mystifying games’ Tallis. If one of them falls on the ball and manages to get it out, our wing combination of Phil ‘who?’ Murton and Greg ‘even less attractive than the suburb’ Whittlesea comes into the game. If we’re in real strife, we might throw the ever-dangerous (to us) Scott Crow into the mix. And the depth doesn’t end there.

Look, it’s unlikely, but maybe your midfield is so disastrous we get it forward, where the all-time weakest full-forward line awaits to run in the opposite direction at a pace that would embarrass Cale Morton. On their day, Leon ‘celebrate a goal when getting flogged’ Higgins, Simon ‘plays like his surname’ Minton-Connell and Alex ‘high draft pick before draft camps existed’ McDonald struck fear into the hearts of absolutely no defenders across several glorious years. A special shout-out here to Shayne Stevenson. Gutsy player who should be remembered for playing out a game and even kicking a goal with a busted ankle because we had nobody on the bench. But he will live in my memory for being the only player I’ve ever seen try to mark the ball with his hands a metre apart and let it hit him in the forehead. THE BALL’S ONLY THIS BIG SHAYNE!

I haven’t even got to the critical CHF yet, which was a tough call between Tim ‘no, there was a footy player with the same name’ Allen and Jason ‘I think he played OK once against Essendon. Pretty sure he got a goal’ Taylor. That goal probably sealed Timmy’s fate, and here he is, surrounded by the likes of Mark ‘delisted by Fitzroy’ Bunn and Ricky (I’m not even going to put a nickname here. Seriously, wtf) Nixon.

Inevitably, the pill will make its way into your forward line, where the crème de la crème of your key forward crop will be challenged by Jonathan ‘no, his brother’ Robran and Jarrad ‘dickhead policy’ Boumann, ‘ably’ assisted by the likes of Darren ‘best clubman’ Baxter and Austin McCrabb, known for his practical jokes but none were better than somehow getting a trade to Hawthorn. But the real half-back hero has to be Barry ‘*******’ Young, who played 13 inexplicable games for us, a number coincidentally 13 higher than the number of targets he hit. Nobody’s bringing it out of there except the field umpire.

Anyway, here they are in all their roasted, crispy-skinned glory.

B: Austin McCrabb, Jonathan Robran, Jon Hassall
HB: Darren Baxter, Jarrad Boumann, Barry Young
C: Phil Murton, Brett Johnson, Greg Whittlesea
HF: Mark Bunn, Tim Allen, Ricky Nixon
F: Leon Higgins, Simon Minton-Connell, Alex McDonald
R: Simon Crawshay, Jono O’Rourke, Rayden Tallis
IC: Scott Crow, Shayne Stevenson, Nathan Lonie, Mitch Hallahan, Sam Grimley, FFS there are even more

So what do you say? Do these grade A potatoes make the cut? Can your club bring a team that could lose to them? Take the challenge! I look forward to reading your attempts and thinking, ‘Oh, that guy’.

* All-time = when I’ve seen most of my footy. And it’s weighted towards the 90s, as it really was an extended period of un-Hawthornness.
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I'm surprised we still exist given the, ahem, calibre of some of those who've run out for us.
 

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Purple Suit said:
B: Chris Groom, Dan Parker, Phil Gilbert
HB: Greg Harding, Trent Croad, Marcus Drum
C: Harley Balic, Brock O'Brien, Jayden Pitt
HF: Colin Sylvia, Shane Kersten, Josh Simpson
F: Daniel Metropolis, Brendon Feddema, Clayton Collard
R: Rory Lobb, Harley Bennell, Viv Mitchie
IC: Casey Sibosado, Jesse Cricton, Hugh Dixon, Tom Sheridan
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Michie, Balic, Gilbert - I'd forgotten all about them 🥺 (Sylvia was a decent player for us when he could be ****ed).
 
philohk said:
Hey baybes. As I’m sure you’re all aware, the mighty Hawks are currently on their inexorable rise to another dynasty. But in all honesty, that might be several months away and we’re a bit rubbish at the moment.

And it got me thinking: who’d make our all-time* spud team? But more than that: would our spud team be so spudly that it would lose to everyone else’s spud team?

Creating this team was a challenge I took on with alacrity for about half an hour. But I think it’s a winner (loser). A few highlights:

Play starts at the bounce, where Simon Crawshay will be easily outpointed by whoever your ruckman is. Doesn’t really matter. He’s no better around the ground, with a footy brain matched only by his physique.

If the ball hits the deck rather than being put down your mids’ throats, it’s ready to be overrun and fumbled by a devastating combination of Brett ‘Pagan-era Carlton’ Johnson, Jono ‘apparently number two draft pick’ O’Rourke and our captain, Rayden ‘163 mystifying games’ Tallis. If one of them falls on the ball and manages to get it out, our wing combination of Phil ‘who?’ Murton and Greg ‘even less attractive than the suburb’ Whittlesea comes into the game. If we’re in real strife, we might throw the ever-dangerous (to us) Scott Crow into the mix. And the depth doesn’t end there.

Look, it’s unlikely, but maybe your midfield is so disastrous we get it forward, where the all-time weakest full-forward line awaits to run in the opposite direction at a pace that would embarrass Cale Morton. On their day, Leon ‘celebrate a goal when getting flogged’ Higgins, Simon ‘plays like his surname’ Minton-Connell and Alex ‘high draft pick before draft camps existed’ McDonald struck fear into the hearts of absolutely no defenders across several glorious years. A special shout-out here to Shayne Stevenson. Gutsy player who should be remembered for playing out a game and even kicking a goal with a busted ankle because we had nobody on the bench. But he will live in my memory for being the only player I’ve ever seen try to mark the ball with his hands a metre apart and let it hit him in the forehead. THE BALL’S ONLY THIS BIG SHAYNE!

I haven’t even got to the critical CHF yet, which was a tough call between Tim ‘no, there was a footy player with the same name’ Allen and Jason ‘I think he played OK once against Essendon. Pretty sure he got a goal’ Taylor. That goal probably sealed Timmy’s fate, and here he is, surrounded by the likes of Mark ‘delisted by Fitzroy’ Bunn and Ricky (I’m not even going to put a nickname here. Seriously, wtf) Nixon.

Inevitably, the pill will make its way into your forward line, where the crème de la crème of your key forward crop will be challenged by Jonathan ‘no, his brother’ Robran and Jarrad ‘dickhead policy’ Boumann, ‘ably’ assisted by the likes of Darren ‘best clubman’ Baxter and Austin McCrabb, known for his practical jokes but none were better than somehow getting a trade to Hawthorn. But the real half-back hero has to be Barry ‘*******’ Young, who played 13 inexplicable games for us, a number coincidentally 13 higher than the number of targets he hit. Nobody’s bringing it out of there except the field umpire.

Anyway, here they are in all their roasted, crispy-skinned glory.

B: Austin McCrabb, Jonathan Robran, Jon Hassall
HB: Darren Baxter, Jarrad Boumann, Barry Young
C: Phil Murton, Brett Johnson, Greg Whittlesea
HF: Mark Bunn, Tim Allen, Ricky Nixon
F: Leon Higgins, Simon Minton-Connell, Alex McDonald
R: Simon Crawshay, Jono O’Rourke, Rayden Tallis
IC: Scott Crow, Shayne Stevenson, Nathan Lonie, Mitch Hallahan, Sam Grimley, FFS there are even more

So what do you say? Do these grade A potatoes make the cut? Can your club bring a team that could lose to them? Take the challenge! I look forward to reading your attempts and thinking, ‘Oh, that guy’.

* All-time = when I’ve seen most of my footy. And it’s weighted towards the 90s, as it really was an extended period of un-Hawthornness.
Click to expand...
Alex McDonald should be CHF.
 
Purple Suit said:
B: Chris Groom, Dan Parker, Phil Gilbert
HB: Greg Harding, Trent Croad, Marcus Drum
C: Harley Balic, Brock O'Brien, Jayden Pitt
HF: Colin Sylvia, Shane Kersten, Josh Simpson
F: Daniel Metropolis, Brendon Feddema, Clayton Collard
R: Rory Lobb, Harley Bennell, Viv Mitchie
IC: Casey Sibosado, Jesse Cricton, Hugh Dixon, Tom Sheridan
Click to expand...

Tommy Sheridan and Marcus Drum :fire: Some great names in here. Had forgotten about a bunch of them. Didn't Mitchie miss more games than he played? Shane Kersten gives Tim Allen a run for his money.

Also Croad > Croad
 
philohk said:
There were more. Could've made an AS squad of 40. I think Judge (PBUH) brought over half of East Fremantle.
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That was when I was a child; not a good time to be a Hawks supporter. We made up for it layer, but are pretty spud worthy atm.
 
Thinking of a Geelong version, at least from my earlier memories from about 1977 onwards, i guess there could be a side of if not necessarily duds (as any VFL/AFL footballer is better at the game than probably 99.5% of the posters here) but of players who certainly were not exactly in the Wayne Carey school of talent.

Probably starting with the backline, you have the Geelong incarnation of Austin McCrabb, who might be a hall of famer in making two club's such lists. Hamish Simpson showed some promise at full back but only lasted a year or so at Geelong, and he'd have been ably helped by defenders like Tom Gillies as well.

Half backs, well we could have the likes of Richard Murrie, Jan Smits and Michael Leneghan, although perhaps Peter Whyte, Scott Hosking and John Hoiles could have interchanged there.

Centremen, well we had the maligned wingman Alan Reid from Essendon, along with the equally maligned former Tiger wing Shane Williams with perhaps Rob Waddell or Alan Mangels as the men in the middle.

Half forward, well we did have the likes of Damian Christensen, Ross Christensen (not related) or maybe even Trevor Spencer at CHF, and perhaps floating around the flanks as well Russell Merriman.

Full forward line, perhaps a resting ruckman in either Paul Chambers or David Loats in a 1-2 tag team of pure duddery, along with maybe Shane Kersten and Darcy Lang floating around quasi-dangerously around looking for the crumbs.

Ruckman, well we'd have to have Loats or Chambers (nicknamed 'Torture' i believe)...Sydney i think were grateful to receive him in a trade...funnily enough i think that was in 2005, maybe he was the secret to their Flag that year. If not either of those then Geelong's only #1 pick Stephen (Knees) Hooper could do the job. Maybe Kane Tenace and David Spriggs as the ruck rover and rover combo.

For the bench, well maybe Brent Grgic (another man who might get a gig in two clubs' such lists) George Burbury, Josh Cowan, who played about twice as many games as he spent years on the team list, and maybe the man who spent 5 years at the club in the 90's in the process of playing one NAB cup game...David Ugrinic.

There's probably a few others who i may have overlooked but that's a fairly special side of moderate footballers.
 
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