Days Since Essendon Who will be Essendon's finals bitches?

[zackah]

Hello friends.

After a somewhat publicised small break between finals wins Essendon's #excitingyouf are entering a period I am sure we can all agree is pure dominance. So of course it begs the question - who will break our (relatively short) finals duck and forever be known as our finals bitches? A few personal favourite noms include:

Hawfs - mod confirmed
Tankers - we would probably never see V23 again
Pies - See above and replace with Saveloy Rockstar (who I hope updated his will first)
Tassie - this would be fun. Despite having to wait a few years the Jazny melts would be next level
Aints - Plugger35 melts would rival the 2016 grand final
Swans - though I'd rather meet them in a GF but TheGoatBaron & sthmelb_dimmies mega melts would ensue

So who will it be? I can smell your fear from here. Will it be you? Will you break our finals drought (which is a totally acceptable and normal amount of time between wins)

Vote and melt below.

inb4 I'll be dead
inb4 another 8,000 days
inb4 never
Shut up D/Hs

 

[TheGoatBaron]

Hello friends.

After a somewhat publicised small break between finals wins Essendon's #excitingyouf are entering a period I am sure we can all agree is pure dominance. So of course it begs the questions - who will break our (relatively short) finals duck and forever be known as our finals bitches? A few personal favourite noms include:

Hawfs - mod confirmed
Tankers - we would probably never see V23 again
Pies - See above and replace with Saveloy Rockstar (who I hope updated his will first)
Tassie - this would be fun. Despite having to wait a few years the Jazny melts would be next level
Aints - Plugger35 melts would rival the 2016 grand final
Swans - though I'd rather meet them in a GF but TheGoatBaron & sthmelb_dimmies mega melts would ensue

So who will it be? I can all smell your fear from here. Will it be you? Will you break our finals drought (which is a totally acceptable and normal amount of time between wins)

Vote and melt below.

inb4 I'll be dead
inb4 another 8,000 days
inb4 never
Shut up D/Hs

You have to win a final first to get in a GF DH

 

[V23]

Depends, are they going to start juicing again?

 

[zackah]

You have to win a final first to get in a GF DH

That's kind of the subject of this fred flog

 

[Saveloy Rockstar]

Where is the “Nobody because you have to make finals before you can win one” option

 

[TheGoatBaron]

Depends, are they going to start juicing again?

They have to juice up just to get out of the bottom 6

 

[V23]

They have to juice up just to get out of the bottom 6

Maybe zackah can give them some of his juice boxes from his lunch box when he has recess

 

[Dinsdale]

What team will scum play when they finish 10th in the new travesty "finals"?

 

[TheGoatBaron]

Maybe zackah can give them some of his juice boxes from his lunch box when he has recess

Even if the juice box is 50 years old. Knowing Zackah, he’d still have the original

 

[zackah]

Maybe zackah can give them some of his juice boxes from his lunch box when he has recess

Oh I'm young now? I thought I was a boomer?

Also...

 

[V23]

Oh I'm young now? I thought I was a boomer?

Also...

Physically old af, mentally a toddler

#hopethishelps

 

[zackah]

Physically old af, mentally a toddler

#hopethishelps

Says the flog that has a tantrum and hides on his team board every time his shit team loses

 

[Jazny]

With Andrew McGrath

1

Andrew Mcgrath

Age

27

Ht

180cm

Wt

83kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

22.7

5star

K

11.6

4star

HB

11.1

5star

M

1.6

2star

T

6.4

5star

MG

252.9

4star

D

22.7

5star

K

11.6

4star

HB

11.1

5star

M

1.6

2star

T

6.4

5star

MG

252.9

4star

D

22.0

5star

K

11.0

4star

HB

11.0

5star

M

1.2

2star

T

6.4

5star

MG

219.0

4star

and Brad Scott at the helm, what can go wrong?

 

[V23]

Says the flog that has a tantrum and hides on his team board every time his shit team loses

Heaven forbid I want to dissect the loss with fellow Carlton supporters

You better hope I’m around, because with Elmer gone you’ll have no one else to try to bait into a melt

 

[zackah]

With Andrew McGrath and Brad Scott at the helm, what can go wrong?

 

[frggr]

Their supporters. Again.

 

[sthmelb_dimmies]

Hello friends.

After a somewhat publicised small break between finals wins Essendon's #excitingyouf are entering a period I am sure we can all agree is pure dominance. So of course it begs the question - who will break our (relatively short) finals duck and forever be known as our finals bitches? A few personal favourite noms include:

Hawfs - mod confirmed
Tankers - we would probably never see V23 again
Pies - See above and replace with Saveloy Rockstar (who I hope updated his will first)
Tassie - this would be fun. Despite having to wait a few years the Jazny melts would be next level
Aints - Plugger35 melts would rival the 2016 grand final
Swans - though I'd rather meet them in a GF but TheGoatBaron & sthmelb_dimmies mega melts would ensue

So who will it be? I can smell your fear from here. Will it be you? Will you break our finals drought (which is a totally acceptable and normal amount of time between wins)

Vote and melt below.

inb4 I'll be dead
inb4 another 8,000 days
inb4 never
Shut up D/Hs

lol bookmarked

 

[zackah]

100% of votes for tankers so far. Not looking good Elmer_Hauser V23

 

[Sqotty from office works]

Spoke to Elmer when he was loading my groceries today.
He thinks in a tight tussle Keilor would still beat the injectors in a final.

Keilor not on pole.

 

[philreich]

LOL talking about a finals win, when they haven't won a single game since May 2025.

 

[Bont2Bruce]

#InB4Backfire

 

[zackah]

LOL talking about a finals win, when they haven't won a single game since May 2025.

 

[philreich]

View attachment 2532937

View attachment 2532938

Congrats on the 4 points .

 

[zackah]

Congrats on the 4 points .

Thank you friend. I hope you find something new to melt about when you realise Kern wasn't the problem and your team is just

Also a preemptive thanks for Butters

 

[philreich]

Thank you friend. I hope you find something new to melt about when you realise Kern wasn't the problem and your team is just

Also a preemptive thanks for Butters

Early days friend - looking forward to flogging the Bombers in round 2.