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Vyvyan: It's a video nasty!

Rick: It's a carpet farty!

Rick: Vyvyan! You utter bastard! Why aren't you in your bed?

Vyvyan: Because I'm not going to bed tonight.

Rick: What do you mean you're not going to bed tonight? How dare you not go to bed tonight! I go to all the trouble to board you up in your bedroom, and you don't even have the common decency to be in there!

Rick: Vyvyan, you never told us your mother was a bartender.

Vyvyan: She was a shoplifter when I knew her.

Neil: She doesn't look strong enough. To lift shops

Neil: [doing the washing] Come on, guys. The sooner we start, the sooner we finish.

Rick: Ha. They said that about the... , er... , something that took a long time to finish.

Rick: We NEVER clean the toilet, Neil. That's what being a student is all about. No way, Harpic. No way, Dot. All that Blue Loo scene is for squares. One thing's for sure, Neil. When Cliff Richard wrote "Wired for Sound", no way was he sitting on a clean lavatory. He was living on the limit, just like me. Where the only place to put bleach is in your hair.

Vyvyan: Living on Limits? What, are you on a diet?

Rick: No, I live on The Limit, Vyvyan. The Limit. Because I'm a Rider at the Gates of Dawn and I take no prisoners.

Mike: Rick, Your parents died this morning.

Rick: My parents are dead? I can't believe it.

Neil: And you think that's bad?

Rick: Well yes I do actually what's it to you piss face?

Rick: [pacing around the room] Meringue... Boomerang... Long, blue, boomerang...

Vyvyan: Oh, shut up.

Rick: I'm trying to free form.

Vyvyan: I'm trying to read.

Rick: OH, REALLY! I learned how to do that years ago. And what is it your reading Vyvian? A bit of Petrarchian verse, is it? A little bit of French drama?

Vyvyan: It's called "SS Death Camp Criminal Battalion go to Monte Casino for the Massacre".

Rick: [snatching comic] That's MY bloody comic.

Vyvyan: Give it back.

Rick: No, Vyvyan. It's mine.

[sits down and reads]

Rick: Anyway, there's no point in reading comics, they're stupid. They treat the kids as if they we're... well, you know, kids. Nothing but war in them. War, war bloody war. Why can't they have stories about love and peace?

Vyvyan: Because it's sissy, you girly.

Rick: I'm not being girly, Vyvyian. Longing for a peaceful world is not being girly.

Vyvyan: It is - It's being soppy and very very girly.

Rick: I AM NOT BEING G - Look, this entire discussion is completely sexist anyway and I don't intend to continue it.

[puts head down to read comic]

Rick: but

[looks up again]

Rick: for your information, it is not soppy of me to long for a world where a man will love his brother.

Vyvyan: ****.

Rick: You're dilibratelly trying to provoke me aren't you?

Vyvyan: Yeah.

Rick: For one man to love another, Vyvyan, is not ****y. It's actually very beautiful. It's only when they start touching each others bottoms that it gets ****y.