Dennis Commetti 'isms'

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Dennis should spend a bit less time during the week thinking up smart arse comments and do a bit more research. His suggestion tonight about the Lions playing Charman forward when he comes back which would allow Bradshaw to play back was a disgrace. The rest of the box went quiet until Bruce reminded him Bradshaw was out for the year.

A few funny comments here and there is great but I prefer commentators who do their research on the game not on clever one-liners.:thumbsdown:
 
Crazy Jim said:
Dennis should spend a bit less time during the week thinking up smart arse comments and do a bit more research. His suggestion tonight about the Lions playing Charman forward when he comes back which would allow Bradshaw to play back was a disgrace. The rest of the box went quiet until Bruce reminded him Bradshaw was out for the year.

A few funny comments here and there is great but I prefer commentators who do their research on the game not on clever one-liners.:thumbsdown:
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So you're basically in favour of a Bruce-style commentary rather than a Dennisesque one. I think there's a place for both.

By the way, what was his response when Bruce reminded him?
 

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His response was silence..........He knew he had stuffed up. I don't mind the odd funny line but he spends his entire week preparing for the game by thinking up one-liners - none of it is off-the-cuff it is all prepared. Don't you think he should actually spend some of his week researching the two teams he is calling??
 
Crazy Jim said:
His response was silence..........He knew he had stuffed up. I don't mind the odd funny line but he spends his entire week preparing for the game by thinking up one-liners - none of it is off-the-cuff it is all prepared. Don't you think he should actually spend some of his week researching the two teams he is calling??
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So a commentator has NEVER made a mistake in the history of any sport?

Get off it.

Bruce and Dennis complement each other very well.
 

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Essendon's Mark McVeigh about to take a kick, Cometti says, "the aptly named Bomber..."

Subtle reference to the executed Oaklahama City bomber, Timothy McVeigh.


Think Dennis got away with it, no-one seemed to notice.
 
It, s pretty hard to rehearse oneliners and bring them up during a game. I can tell you Denis' research usually starts on Tuesday before a match.
 
Classic comments of WA's own Dennis Commetti...

"Bell bringing the ball out of the back line..... looking for wide
runners..... passes to Walker... a contradiction in terms, really"

"The goal square's full of Bears, looks like we've got ourselves a convoy"

"The umpire's done himself a mischief"

"Scotty Cummings alone in the square, jumping up and down and waving his
arms like they're playing My Sharona"

"Ugle playing on Peter Matera, fumbling around for the ball and probably his
autograph book..."

"A couple of big touches from Clive Waterhouse, who was battling up until
about 5 minutes ago, in danger of becoming Clive Waterboy."

Dermott: And the ball spills free to Kickett...
Cometti: Troy Cook you mean?
Dermott: Yes.. well, they do look rather alike.
Cometti: How so Dermott?
Dermott: (realising that sounded rather racist.) Umm, well, they are both..
er..
Cometti: .. Midfielders, yes Dermott.

After the Mcmanus/Wirrpunda clash a few derbies back. 'Shaun goes back to
collect the ball, a free kick, and several teeth.'

COMETTI versus fellow commentator Gerrard Healy:
Healy: 'Word is this guy is the most reliable kick for goal in the side. They
say down at Collingwood if you had to have someone kicking for your life,
Tarkyn Lockyer would be the man.'
Commetti: 'Id prefer my mum'
(silence)
Commetti: 'Not a great footballer, but at least she'd care.'


"Ashley McIntosh, like a good hair spray... capable of a subtle hold"

"Barlow to Bateman, the Hawks are attacking alphabetically"

"The Magpies ought to be kicking themselves right now, but with their luck,
they'd probably miss."

"Carl Steinfort looking more like Robert Walls than Robert Walls"

Commetti: "McVeigh, bobbing like a cork in the ocean" [Cue applause from all
in the Nine box, as it was the debut "cork in the ocean" call for the
season]
Commetti: "Well, it was cork material?"

"The only change to the Eagles side is that Rowan Jones has had a haircut"

"Farmer may have an injury to his calf........ hmmm, a farmer with a calf
problem."

"Parker to Carr...... sounds like a match made in heaven!"

After Lloyd gives Wakelin a little slap on ANZAC Day: "Whoaa, there will be
a duel at 5 oclock."

Dennis: "Dear shoots? wait on the goal umpire? behind. A wry smile there
from the goal umpire, certainly a sense of the dramatic."
Don Scott: "He's the danger man, Dennis."
Dennis: "Who? The goal umpire?"
Don: "No, Dear. Paul Dear."
Dennis: "Brennan kicks out to the outer side, straight to Paul Dear - you're
uncanny Don."

Dennis: King to Ling
Dermott: Just forward of the wing
Dennis: Don't you start!

"It's a goal! A dream start for Hawthorn. Spider had both his legs taken out
from under him - leaving only the other six to balance on....."

Stewart Dew kicks for goal early in the first: "He was brought here to do
exactly that..(pause)... actually 5 more than that, he kicks a behind."

On former Magpie, Crow and now Cat, Brenton Sanderson: "He goes much better
as a mammal"

On Corey McKernan's poor form: "He's like a long jumper who can't reach the
sand."

"I love that surname Fixter. Sounds like something from a Batman movie -The
Fixter? but I digress..."

"There's talk of Karl Langdon offering his services to St Kilda, as if it
wasn't bad enough being in 15th position"

Last night when Richmond kicked up the middle towards Ray Hall:"Richmond
attack through the corridor in this case the Hall."

"Brown..... down to Jones.... all we need now is Smith"

Tony Liberatore had just gone into a pack as he is wont to do and come out
with blood gushing from his eye: "Libba went into the pack optimistically
and came out misty optically."

Dennis, after describing the second of 2 easy dropped marks says,
"the Tale of Two Sitters".

When Mark went up for a mark: "... and the Mercuri is rising..."

Dermie: "Why do you suppose he went side on to take the mark?" Dennis:
"He probably was trying to impress the Russian judge."

"Richardson contests the ruck.... without much conviction. Well, he may be
the best player on their list........ well, certainly Matthew thinks he's
the best player on their list at the moment...... mind you, that's a bit
like being the best Centre Half Forward in Czechoslovakia....."

"Almost a touch of synchronised swimming about that mark..... minus the
peg..."

"Ball in dispute, Lamb, now Yze the meat in the sandwich Really Lamb should
be in the sandwich."

"If it was a set play, they copied it from a Portugese bus time-table"

"How do you beat Rehn? Where's Stimpy???"

"Great stuff by Caracella - moments before McIntosh had treated him like a
rent-a- car".

After Darren Gaspar hits the post from 40 metres out: "Gaspar, the
unfriendly post"
 
demonandy said:
"To quote Borat, Collingwood's defense was looser than a wizard's sleeve" LOL!!
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LOL!! I was watching the telecast when he said this and I laughed so hard I did a little wee in my pants.

Funniest commentary line ever, particularly when you realise exactly what a wizard's sleeve is a reference to. :D
 
Goosecat said:
COMETTI versus fellow commentator Gerrard Healy:
Healy: 'Word is this guy is the most reliable kick for goal in the side. They
say down at Collingwood if you had to have someone kicking for your life,
Tarkyn Lockyer would be the man.'
Commetti: 'Id prefer my mum'
(silence)
Commetti: 'Not a great footballer, but at least she'd care.'
Click to expand...


Hehe thats funny.
 
When Goddard scored a goal last night after a long drought by the Saints Dennis cries "Thank Goddard its Friday!":thumbsu:
 
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