Imaginary Holiday destinations

[Bobby Giovanni]

Much like the Bar & Grill thread, I would like to go on a holiday.

Now here are the rules:
- I WILL NOT actually go on the holiday
- I WILL pretend I am on the holiday
- I WILL post sporadically, and mention landmarks, attractions etc as if I am LOOKING RIGHT AT THEM but my IP will NEVER CHANGE
- I WILL compare my holiday (that I'm not actually going on) with previous trips (that I may or may not have been on, I will decide at the time)
- I WILL give advice on accommodation and what not to eat
- I WILL NOT bring back any knick knacks (don't believe in them - plus I'm not really going) or photos (got my camera stolen at {insert destination here} - not really)
- I WILL brag about my sexual conquests. Repeatedly.
- Upon return I WILL be grateful for everything I have at home (although ironically, I have never left it) and yet yearn for the public transport system in {insert destination here}
- I WILL NOT go to anywhere that it's cool to dress up in toga's or cheese
- I WILL have a mishap that lands me in hospital so that I can praise/berate the health system wherever I am
- I WILL meet up with any BF posters who are in the place I am travelling through and shout them drinks, but steal smokes off them. Repeatedly.

So now that you know the rules, I would like you to help me with a destination. Maybe you can suggest somewhere, or perhaps a good imaginary Travel Agent. Maybe I can sleep on your couch on the way through. IT IS UP TO YOU.

Once I have chosen a destination, my well deserved break will commence. My passport is ready, but I am happy to travel nationally.

 

[Runk]

I suggest Moe.
It's quite the destination and all the cool kids are going there nowadays.
Plus, you're sure to meet a local woman who wants to shag, as much as you're likely to find that everyone who lives there is virtually on holiday (unemployed).
No one wears a toga but tracksuits instead (a great holiday outfit 24/7) with moccasins/ugg boots.
Knick knacks are considered valuable housewares and quite dear.
Stealing smokes, well stealing anything really, is considered normal and I urge you to do it as often as possible.

Your destination has been chosen. I suggest you hitchhike however as it's far more cheaper, however you may have to put out. It's the law of the highway!

 

[Uncle Steve]

Nimbin.

Much like Moe, but the drugs are better.

 

[Bobby Giovanni]

How about Amsterdam? Wouldn't their drugs be better?

And plus, I could use Vincent Vega's story, and say it was mine. Maybe even search for some photos, make a collage, then claim I had been there?

 

[Rodion]

Moe's main claim to fame used to be a lady who was the spitting image of Merv Hughes. Now it's a dead toddler.

Do you need to know anything more about the place?

 

[Runk]

Originally posted by Bobby Giovanni
How about Amsterdam? Wouldn't their drugs be better?

And plus, I could use Vincent Vega's story, and say it was mine. Maybe even search for some photos, make a collage, then claim I had been there?

Listen Bobby, you either wants suggestions or you don'ts.
Which is it?

If you want to go to an imaginary place like Amsterdam, then go. I ain't stoppin ya. But don't you dare come crying to me when you lose your imaginary virginity by getting acosted by a drunk imaginary hermaphrodite in a dark imaginary alleyway.
(We'll want the pictures nontheless) We suggest places, you either go or stay. That's. How. It. Works.

Let it be known my imaginary love for Moe be strong. Very strong.

 

[Bomber Spirit]

Here's some suggestions. These are real places:

Nobber (Donegal, Ireland)
Arsoli (Lazio, Italy)
Muff (Northern Ireland)
Bastard (Norway)
Twatt (Shetland, UK)
Dildo (Newfoundland, Canada)
****ie (Zimbabwe)
Climax (Colorado, USA)
Lickey End (West Midlands, UK)
Shafter (California, USA)
Dongo (Congo - Democratic Republic)
Dong Rack (Thailand-Cambodia border)
Donk (Belgium)
Intercourse (Pennsylvania, USA)
Brown Willy (every schoolboy's favourite, Cornwall, UK)
Lord Berkeley's Knob (Sutherland, Scotland)
****lingthorpe (Yorkshire, UK)
Stains (Near Paris, France)
Seymen (Turkey)
Turdo (Romania)
Fukum (Yemen)
Fukue (Honshu, Japan)
Fukui (Honshu, Japan)
Fuku (Shensi, China)
****ie Colliery (Zimbabwe)
****s River (Nicaragua)
****endorf (Schleswig-Holstein, Germany)
****ener (India)
Shag Island (Indian Ocean)
Sexmoan (Luzon, Philippines)
Hold With Hope (Greenland)
Beaver (Oklahoma, USA)
Beaver Head (Idaho, USA)
Wet Beaver Creek (Australia)
Pis Pis River (Nicaragua)
Tittybong (Australia)
Dik**** (India)
Middle Intercourse Island (Australia)
Chinaman's Knob (Australia)

 

[mace007]

Hell.

It's in Norway.

 

[Pessimistic]

2 weeks in vagina. Can be bit humid

 

[Pessimistic]

Actually I spent a pleasant night at the banana yacht club in zaire.

Just inside the mouth of the zaire (congo) river is a port called Banana.

The banana yacht club us a bar/shack on the mud flat beach wih the skeleton of a small boat stuck in the mud.



There again people have been known to visit sunshine because of the name