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Petition to strike "Land of the Giants.'' Henceforth to be known as "Simpsons Paddock"

Duly anoint: Simpsons Paddock

  • "Simpsons Paddock" I see what you did there lol.

    Votes: 2 25.0%
  • But I kind of like "Land of the Giants" and I don't like you.

    Votes: 2 25.0%
  • I'm edgy but also indifferent so... Jack Watts

    Votes: 4 50.0%

  • Total voters
    8

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sharps24

Club Legend
Oct 15, 2023
1,889
3,269
AFL Club
West Coast
Ok guys I know we've had our differences and many do not appreciate my piercing insights, epic rants, excessively verbose replies and inconsequential humour. Hear me out though.

Land of the Giants is a Worsfold era meme. We are way beyond that now. It is round 15 2024 and it has finally happened, the West Coast Eagles have selected a side with six [yes six!] 190cm plus forwards. Thats a full complement folks.

This is now a whole new era. But as we all know, senior coach Adam Simpson played for many years with Wayne Carey under the megaminded Dennis Pagan. Successfully some say. The signature move of 1990's lolnorf was to empty the forward line, expose Wayne Carey one on one with some poor defenceless soul [unless it was Glen Jackovich] and then.. well, profit obviously. They called this Pagans Paddock. But this isn't the 90's anymore Dorothy.

We have arrived at a full circle moment, where the apprentice has become the master. And now, by playing 6 tall forwards and 0 Wayne Careys, Adam Simpson is set to revolutionise the modern game. Many criticise him for Mitch Brown in 2016, they even say that was a failure. But what these people don't realise is at the time we just didn't have enough Mitch Browns. Well we do now!

So please, don't hate. Join me and celebrate this team selection as one unified group. Join me in officially relegating land of the giants, and promoting- and I mean heavily promoting! lets use this moniker always now- the glorious and ingenious SIMPSONS PADDOCK! :fireemoji::fireemoji:🐍
 
Interesting, I guess I imagined we picked Allen, Darling, Waterman, Williams, Maric and Hutchinson in the same team. Says it right there, average hight 182cm. Odd. Extremely odd considering we have maybe 3 players on the entire list who are under 182cm.
 

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Yeah not a bad effort, 4 players. Long 179cm, not playing. Brockman 180cm, playing. Jones, 180cm, playing. Ryan, 181cm, playing. I don't understand maths.
 
I reckon there’s a fair chance FootyWire hasn’t got an official height for Hutch and has counted him as a 0cm tall player.

Adding him in at his listed 190 brings us to 189.3cm average.

I think you are right - they didn’t have the official height so they were rounding down to the nearest 5 metre increment. In Hutchinson’s case that is 0m.

Makes sense.
 
I reckon there’s a fair chance FootyWire hasn’t got an official height for Hutch and has counted him as a 0cm tall player.

Adding him in at his listed 190 brings us to 189.3cm average.

IMG_5530.jpeg

Yep.

No height or weight and has a default birthdate of 1/1/2000 when it’s actually 10/11/2022
 
We can be of similar height to Essendon while still being too tall.

Ball's gonna rebound outta that forward line like it's Quinten Lynch's 2005-era chest.

Flip Backflip GIF
 

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Petition to strike "Land of the Giants.'' Henceforth to be known as "Simpsons Paddock"

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