How many rounds will it take for reality to once again crush Carlton supporters' spirits

[Mofra]

So Bay, it seems your average Carlton fan has the memory of a goldfish as once again their hopes are high this pre-season.
Plastered all over the media is the performance of their no 1 pick (a reward for being shit) Sam Walsh, who performed ok against Box Hill + J O'Meara.

This is a team who had Levi Casboult ruck due to a lack of options. Casboult, who is to ruckwork what Donald Trump is to... ruckwork.

At what point will Carlton supporters abandon the club for the year and flock en masse to the Melbourne Victory fan forum, gelato.com or wherever else their filthy degenerate fanbase dessert to (see what I did there?)

 

[Zoom]

They play their GF against us in round one every year so we will allow them to put up a respectable result. It will probably only be a 50-60 point win, so I’m going with the Gold Coast game. Fortunately they won’t have to deal with Tom Lynch kicking eight against them this season but I’m not sure Jones, Weitering and Marchbank will be able to contain the likes of Leslie, Wright and Crossley.

 

[Dinsdale]

It is funny watching CarLoLton fans getting their hopes up after 1 practice match, where Hawks didnt even play JOM after half time, and stood around chatting in the last quarter where the blues kicked 4 goals to only lose by 24 instead of 48.
A February premiership dream is nice for them.

 

[A Cut Above]

The burden of roof lies squarely on any poster who argues against round 1.

 

[Bender_]

Carlton are basically the Catholic Church. Relevant mid last century when they had a heap of cash and people had faith and they could bully their way to relevance. Nowadays they're strapped for cash, stuck with a few nutjobs that still believe that the messiah will return and lead them to the holy land and anyone with half a brain can see that they're an archaic institution with no place in the modern world.

Makes my pants tight.

 

[3rd Grade Maggy]

Definitely the Gold Coast game. Prior to that we'll have two respectable/close losses, one win and two rising star nominations. Up and about. "No Lynch, No Gold Coast" we'll all be crowing. "When we win this one we'll be two and two with the winless Dogs to come. That means next week we'll be 3 and 2" will shout some others excitedly.

Then we'll play Gold Coast - winless after three rounds obviously. Some big guy will step up into the 'kick a bag against carlton but never more than 2 against anyone else' role vacated by Lynch. ****, i don't know, lets say Two Meter Peter. Holman will kick three in one of his seven games for the year before he is shunted out for some first year phenom who'll just piss off in two years anyway. Some fringe over the hill spud like Rischitelli (is he still playing?) will carve us up. And Walsh will do his shoulder.

But still we show up, year on year. **** I love footy.

 

[A Cut Above]

Carlton are basically the Catholic Church. Relevant mid last century when they had a heap of cash and people had faith and they could bully their way to relevance. Nowadays they're strapped for cash, stuck with a few nutjobs that still believe that the messiah will return and lead them to the holy land and anyone with half a brain can see that they're an archaic institution with no place in the modern world.

Makes my pants tight.

Not to mention both have a history of handing over brown paper bags to shut up victims.

 

[juice t]

Carlton are basically the Catholic Church. Relevant mid last century when they had a heap of cash and people had faith and they could bully their way to relevance. Nowadays they're strapped for cash, stuck with a few nutjobs that still believe that the messiah will return and lead them to the holy land and anyone with half a brain can see that they're an archaic institution with no place in the modern world.

Makes my pants tight.

Pope John Paul had his last visit to Australia in 1995
Carlton last won a flag* in 1995

It all makes sense

 

[chelseacarlton]

If you’re buying, I’d last the entire seasons worth of rounds, then get a cab to any nightclub that would let me in, drink another seasons worth of rounds, probably get in a fight with a chick that looks like a bloke, then go and make out with her mate, then ask the DJ to play some random funk tune from the 70’s, to which he’d reply, your chicks mate looks like a bloke, then he’d ask me to bring them back to his place for a spa and we’d polish off some polish vodka, whilst the girl I made out with makes out with her mate that looks like a bloke, then missus cc would call and say, “you’ve been gone for 22 weeks honey, any chance you could give me Mofras phone number so I can find him and beat his arse to a pulp?
To which I’d reply, nah hun, I think he’s making out with a chick that looks like a bloke, so you might not have to by the looks of where things are headed.
I get home after 22 weeks away, pour me and the missus a glass of bubbly and watch the first round of the finals, happy that I’m at least not Mofra.

 

[Hawk Dork]

If they arent crushed by multiple wooden spoons they wont be by another

 

[Sprout]

I enjoy listening to this podcast after Carlton get smashed (I am a regular listener). Just to hear the heartbreak in their voices.

https://www.sen.com.au/podcasts/the-carlton-show/

 

[Gameova_]

Seasons over already for Carlton

 

[imadodgyumpire]

Being on the Bay is not that much fun when your team is really shit.

Can we at least aim to be closer to ordinary this season, please?

PLEASE???

 

[3rd Grade Maggy]

After this the question is whether anyone will get within five goals of us.

 

[Dinsdale]

I think round 1, after that its all over for the blues, plan for 2020 and beyond.

 

[zackah]

4th quarter of their first JLT match

 

[Paul007]

It's fun listening to drunk Carlton supporters ringing in to SEN after a loss, I think the meltdown from a loss to Gold Coast will be biblical, bigger than anything we have seen for a while, hopefully Frodo will finally get the sack and have to coach StKilda who like setting fire to dwarfs so he will need to watch his back.

 

[the avoca drover]

If you’re buying, I’d last the entire seasons worth of rounds, then get a cab to any nightclub that would let me in, drink another seasons worth of rounds, probably get in a fight with a chick that looks like a bloke, then go and make out with her mate, then ask the DJ to play some random funk tune from the 70’s, to which he’d reply, your chicks mate looks like a bloke, then he’d ask me to bring them back to his place for a spa and we’d polish off some polish vodka, whilst the girl I made out with makes out with her mate that looks like a bloke, then missus cc would call and say, “you’ve been gone for 22 weeks honey, any chance you could give me Mofras phone number so I can find him and beat his arse to a pulp?
To which I’d reply, nah hun, I think he’s making out with a chick that looks like a bloke, so you might not have to by the looks of where things are headed.
I get home after 22 weeks away, pour me and the missus a glass of bubbly and watch the first round of the finals, happy that I’m at least not Mofra.

You should write books, l’d read them.

 

[Strange Cat]

Not to mention both have a history of handing over brown paper bags to shut up victims.

To be fair Carlton handing them out more freely

 

[Tiger2709]

Carlton are basically the Catholic Church. Relevant mid last century when they had a heap of cash and people had faith and they could bully their way to relevance. Nowadays they're strapped for cash, stuck with a few nutjobs that still believe that the messiah will return and lead them to the holy land and anyone with half a brain can see that they're an archaic institution with no place in the modern world.

Makes my pants tight.

So money wasn't the only thing hidden in the brown paper bag?

Was this the inspiration for the Skyhooks classic Smut?

 

[ChappyUK]

So Bay, it seems your average Carlton fan has the memory of a goldfish as once again their hopes are high this pre-season.
Plastered all over the media is the performance of their no 1 pick (a reward for being shit) Sam Walsh, who performed ok against Box Hill + J O'Meara.

This is a team who had Levi Casboult ruck due to a lack of options. Casboult, who is to ruckwork what Donald Trump is to... ruckwork.

At what point will Carlton supporters abandon the club for the year and flock en masse to the Melbourne Victory fan forum, gelato.com or wherever else their filthy degenerate fanbase dessert to (see what I did there?)

Round 2.

 

[HairyO]

Round 2.

In a good mood today eh?

 

[Mofra]

Congratulations Carlton for providing the reality check that Essendon fans so desperately require.

 

[Laphroaig]

Congratulations Carlton for providing the reality check that Essendon fans so desperately require.

Pfft. Essendon are our bitch. Their supporters actually expect to lose to Carlton, which is amusing on several levels.

 

[chelseacarlton]

4th quarter of their first JLT match

How’s this post feeling now?
Lul