Dumb Thieves

[B2..]

They certainly breed 'em smart in Werribee. (I can say that, living there). From this week's Werribee times:

MAN FOUND GUILTY OF THEFT, BURGLARY

A Werribee man must undertake 100 hours community work over 12 months after pleading guilty in the Werrebee Magistrates Court to a series of thefts.

Timothy XXXX, of Mxxx Street, pleaded guilty and was convicted on four charges of theft and one of burglary in January 2001.

The thefts involved shoplifting from Wyndham supermarkets. The court heard that Maes attempted to steal from three different supermarkets.

Items included hair-care products, DVDs, a bottle of Jim Beam, and eight chicken kebabs that he attempted to hide down the front of his pants.

XXXX was also convicted ................. etc, etc.

 

[The Shev]

I like how you conceal his surname originally and then write it later in the article.

 

[B2..]

LOL, Yeah, I realised my faux pas as soon as I had pressed "submit".

I should have realised that someone would be onto me before I could edit it

I'm excused because I'm from Werribee, too.

Originally posted by The Shev
I like how you conceal his surname originally and then write it later in the article.

 

[JUBJUB]

Originally posted by B2..
and eight chicken kebabs that he attempted to hide down the front of his pants.

I wonder if he uses the pick up line "Would you like to see my giblets ?"

 

[rizzo]

i got 1:

two ladys decided to steal a car while they were walking home. they broke into it and a neighbour called the cops. they finally got the car started then realised that they both couldnt drive.

 

[Fullarton Power]

Originally posted by B2..

I'm excused because I'm from Werribee, too.

i hope you're not the bloke that rents my investment property!!

 

[TheWackedYak]

Sweet Jesus

That is the funniest thing I've read in ages. I'm most upset now that I can no longer be the first who reads the Banner (I'm now in Hobsons Bay territory, and they're not bred as thick as they are in Wyndham town).

Funny thing, with the Safeway set-ups as they are in Hoppers and Werribee, he's probably had them all down his strides in the one attempt!!!

I've lived 90% of my life there, so I reckon I can have a crack at Werribeeans too!!!

 

[Fullarton Power]

Originally posted by TheWackedYak
Sweet Jesus

That is the funniest thing I've read in ages. I'm most upset now that I can no longer be the first who reads the Banner (I'm now in Hobsons Bay territory, and they're not bred as thick as they are in Wyndham town).

Funny thing, with the Safeway set-ups as they are in Hoppers and Werribee, he's probably had them all down his strides in the one attempt!!!

I've lived 90% of my life there, so I reckon I can have a crack at Werribeeans too!!!

Just so long as he didnt travel by the rail service. It has to be the worst damn rail service in Australia.

 

[pav_is_god]

Well, sounds like he's got a lot of room down there to begin with.

 

[the fly]

Originally posted by Fullarton Power
Just so long as he didnt travel by the rail service. It has to be the worst damn rail service in Australia.

Worse than Sydney?????

 

[Fullarton Power]

Originally posted by the fly
Worse than Sydney?????

Anyone who has had the misfortune of travelling on the Werribee line, unless its changed since last year, can attest to the fact it is the slowest, most inconvenient rail line of any in Australia.

Not only does it have very few express services, it takes a 15 minute diversion on single track around three stations where hardly anyone gets on or off, for no reason other than a stupid Labor Government policy of saving that ailing line from closure.
For some reason it also runs the oldest of the old rolling stock, the rails are 100 years old in places, the trains are always filthy and running late - it's just a colossal joke. And as for the connecting buses...

Anyone from Werribee who can add that it has changed for the better since I returned to Adelaide please feel free.

 

[Rodion]

What about the guy in Europe who robbed a bank, stuffed the money in a paper bag, then left it behind because he picked up a customer's packed lunch by mistake. Hope the salami sandwich was worth it, bub!