THE BOY BEAV
Debutant
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Kevin Sheedy:
"Chicken? I swore i thought it was a seagul that came down in a flying saucer?!?"
Denis Pagan:
"Gee, I'd never tell any of my chicken to cross media street. Sure, its easy crossing roads on paper, but you tell me, how many premierships has the chicken coached?"
Leigh Matthews:
"I'm sick of this phobia coming from other pens about how much extra money we have to keep enticing our chicken to cross our roads. You tell me one time we've used it to poach other livestock? And it does cost alot to feed chickens up here you know!?!"
Mick Malthouse:
"The chicken maybe slow, but the Colonel is patient, and this chicken just has to get better at crossing roads."
Mark Williams:
"I've fair dinkum had a gutfull of people having a go at our chicken! Gees, give us a break! It was a really big gutter that last one and we know we need to get better at crossing that final bit of the road. But the road markings were terrible and the traffic lights were clearly against us. Why dont you all go and get stuffed!?!"
Dean Laidley:
"Look, i rang Mick to ask him why the chicken crossed the road, but i'm still trying to work out what the hell he was on about! But he's been great for me and my chickens has Mick. But to me, crossing the road seemed like the best option. But one thing thats really annoying me are the people who call themselves true chicken people not coming out and watching this chook's efforts to cross roads. Why anyone wouldnt want to back this chicken is beyond me!"
Danny Frawley:
"Look, the chicken tried as hard as he could to get across and even though he was road kill before he even got half way, i still couldnt be more proud of his efforts."
Grant Thomas:
"The culture of this chicken just has to get better. So far i've been happy with the process the chicken has followed in terms of getting the structure of road crossing and deciding to actually cross the road and taking the first steps. But next year it might be a rooster who decides he wants to put his hand up and cross it, or a pea****, or a sparrow... what we eventually want is a solid group of poultry who all want to cross the same road together and lead all the other birds along the same path."
Peter Schwabb:
"Look i really dont know if the chicken even wants to cross the bloody road! But i reckon he's a pretty attractive chicken? Dont you? My chest hurts..."
Neil Daniher:
"Well, ah, um, ah... I really like the taste of chicken!! But no one makes it better than old Ma back on the farm. Anyway, I know the road was busy and there didn't seem like much of a way across it, but i spent all week planning that journey for this chicken and you tell me one option who was a better one to cross that road?"
Mark Thompson:
"The chicken is very young and we've all got to be patient. We've got the nature strips in the best condition possible, we've set up allt he traffic signals to give this chicken the best possible chance of crossing the road. It might not happen this year or next, but eventually we're hoping this chicken will get across that road"
Garry Ayres:
"Well um, er, at the ah, end of the ah, day this chicken is sick of having to travel to other chicken's roads despite finishing higher than the other chickens. It really is something the TAC needs to look at..."
Paul Roos:
"Because we offered him $300,000 a year more than his former farmer could to cross his road."
John Worsfold:
"Because i told it to. Got a problem with that mate?!!"
Chris Connolly:
"Because home was on the other side, and everyone knows that this chicken hates being anywhere else"
Peter Rohde:
"We tried to get across there, but then my chicken saw another chicken trying to cross the same road and it was on for young and old!! But we've got too many chickens who are great crossing a down hill road, but just wont put the work in to make it back up the other way."
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Kevin Sheedy:
"Chicken? I swore i thought it was a seagul that came down in a flying saucer?!?"
Denis Pagan:
"Gee, I'd never tell any of my chicken to cross media street. Sure, its easy crossing roads on paper, but you tell me, how many premierships has the chicken coached?"
Leigh Matthews:
"I'm sick of this phobia coming from other pens about how much extra money we have to keep enticing our chicken to cross our roads. You tell me one time we've used it to poach other livestock? And it does cost alot to feed chickens up here you know!?!"
Mick Malthouse:
"The chicken maybe slow, but the Colonel is patient, and this chicken just has to get better at crossing roads."
Mark Williams:
"I've fair dinkum had a gutfull of people having a go at our chicken! Gees, give us a break! It was a really big gutter that last one and we know we need to get better at crossing that final bit of the road. But the road markings were terrible and the traffic lights were clearly against us. Why dont you all go and get stuffed!?!"
Dean Laidley:
"Look, i rang Mick to ask him why the chicken crossed the road, but i'm still trying to work out what the hell he was on about! But he's been great for me and my chickens has Mick. But to me, crossing the road seemed like the best option. But one thing thats really annoying me are the people who call themselves true chicken people not coming out and watching this chook's efforts to cross roads. Why anyone wouldnt want to back this chicken is beyond me!"
Danny Frawley:
"Look, the chicken tried as hard as he could to get across and even though he was road kill before he even got half way, i still couldnt be more proud of his efforts."
Grant Thomas:
"The culture of this chicken just has to get better. So far i've been happy with the process the chicken has followed in terms of getting the structure of road crossing and deciding to actually cross the road and taking the first steps. But next year it might be a rooster who decides he wants to put his hand up and cross it, or a pea****, or a sparrow... what we eventually want is a solid group of poultry who all want to cross the same road together and lead all the other birds along the same path."
Peter Schwabb:
"Look i really dont know if the chicken even wants to cross the bloody road! But i reckon he's a pretty attractive chicken? Dont you? My chest hurts..."
Neil Daniher:
"Well, ah, um, ah... I really like the taste of chicken!! But no one makes it better than old Ma back on the farm. Anyway, I know the road was busy and there didn't seem like much of a way across it, but i spent all week planning that journey for this chicken and you tell me one option who was a better one to cross that road?"
Mark Thompson:
"The chicken is very young and we've all got to be patient. We've got the nature strips in the best condition possible, we've set up allt he traffic signals to give this chicken the best possible chance of crossing the road. It might not happen this year or next, but eventually we're hoping this chicken will get across that road"
Garry Ayres:
"Well um, er, at the ah, end of the ah, day this chicken is sick of having to travel to other chicken's roads despite finishing higher than the other chickens. It really is something the TAC needs to look at..."
Paul Roos:
"Because we offered him $300,000 a year more than his former farmer could to cross his road."
John Worsfold:
"Because i told it to. Got a problem with that mate?!!"
Chris Connolly:
"Because home was on the other side, and everyone knows that this chicken hates being anywhere else"
Peter Rohde:
"We tried to get across there, but then my chicken saw another chicken trying to cross the same road and it was on for young and old!! But we've got too many chickens who are great crossing a down hill road, but just wont put the work in to make it back up the other way."
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