- Banned
- #1
Lleyton muscles his way to straight sets victory
by Staff Reporters
After a convincing straight sets victory last night against wily
Frenchman Arnaud Clement, Lleyton Hewitt’s new muscles said they were looking
forward to the next two weeks, and that there was no reason they
couldn’t take Hewitt all the way to the final.
“Obviously we’ve bulked up a bit in the off season,” his now prominent
biceps told thebladder.com. “And that means we’re much bigger to look
at. When Lleyton clenches his racquet we now bulge far more
impressively, and when he does his little ‘C’MON’ routine, we can be seen to
ripple, if you look closely.”
When asked by reporters how the extra bulk was affecting Hewitt’s game,
his biceps said they were giving him extra power from the backcourt,
boosting the speed of his serves, and making Kim Clijsters think she’d
ditched a hottie.
“When you’re a player like Lleyton, who’s not as tall or as powerful
as, say, Andy Roddick, you need to earn a free few points each game,”
they said. “Now that we’re quite bulky, we’re helping him hit the ball
harder, and of course looking far more imposing. We’re pleased Leyton has
gone with the sleeveless guernsey, too. It’s very intimidatory, don’t
you think?”
But last night’s match wasn’t without controversy. At the end of the
first set, one of Hewitt’s biceps vigorously disputed a line call. Then
early in the third set, the same bicep called a three minute medical
time out, before returning to the court to help the South Australian close
out the match.
“Overall, we’re looking and feeling good,” they said. “We’ve certainly
got the stamina hit the ball hard for hours in a row on hot days. We’re
in peak condition after recent victories in Adelaide and Sydney, we’re
seeing the ball well, and feel like our preparation for this year’s
tournament has been as good as ever. And, we’ve got a fabulous all-over
tan. It really feels like this could be our year.”
Have a read and have some fun here with your comments. I thought it was funny. If you don't find it funny then put your serious hat on and tell everyone why you like him or dislike him.
by Staff Reporters
After a convincing straight sets victory last night against wily
Frenchman Arnaud Clement, Lleyton Hewitt’s new muscles said they were looking
forward to the next two weeks, and that there was no reason they
couldn’t take Hewitt all the way to the final.
“Obviously we’ve bulked up a bit in the off season,” his now prominent
biceps told thebladder.com. “And that means we’re much bigger to look
at. When Lleyton clenches his racquet we now bulge far more
impressively, and when he does his little ‘C’MON’ routine, we can be seen to
ripple, if you look closely.”
When asked by reporters how the extra bulk was affecting Hewitt’s game,
his biceps said they were giving him extra power from the backcourt,
boosting the speed of his serves, and making Kim Clijsters think she’d
ditched a hottie.
“When you’re a player like Lleyton, who’s not as tall or as powerful
as, say, Andy Roddick, you need to earn a free few points each game,”
they said. “Now that we’re quite bulky, we’re helping him hit the ball
harder, and of course looking far more imposing. We’re pleased Leyton has
gone with the sleeveless guernsey, too. It’s very intimidatory, don’t
you think?”
But last night’s match wasn’t without controversy. At the end of the
first set, one of Hewitt’s biceps vigorously disputed a line call. Then
early in the third set, the same bicep called a three minute medical
time out, before returning to the court to help the South Australian close
out the match.
“Overall, we’re looking and feeling good,” they said. “We’ve certainly
got the stamina hit the ball hard for hours in a row on hot days. We’re
in peak condition after recent victories in Adelaide and Sydney, we’re
seeing the ball well, and feel like our preparation for this year’s
tournament has been as good as ever. And, we’ve got a fabulous all-over
tan. It really feels like this could be our year.”
Have a read and have some fun here with your comments. I thought it was funny. If you don't find it funny then put your serious hat on and tell everyone why you like him or dislike him.