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Smacking children

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By all means ban smacking of kids - Just don't anyone tell 'em you're not allowed to.

The threat of a smack is much worse than the smack. I have a 3 yr old girl and if I give her a smack, she just laughs as I'm so soft.
 
I reckon my parents did a good job with me when I was a youngster, and wqhen I have kids I would like to be able to do the same to them.

In my family, if a BOY was very VERY VERY naughty he got a smack - usually a clip around the ear.

My dad didn't hold back, he hit hard and it bluddy well hurt too. But you knew you had been very naughty to cop this treatment.

Dad only ever whacked his sons, and then only between the ages of 7 (when they are old enough to take it and to understand the nature of crime and punishment) and 12.

whacking adolescents and teenagers is dumb and really asking for trouble.

... and of course girls should never ever be hit at all.

so, in my family its was policy to whack a 7-12 yo boy but only if the crime was very serious.

cheers
 
On the whole, smacking kids is not that great a deterrent. I figured out at an early age that I could run faster than my mum and dad, and lock myself in my room after I'd been naughty. The threat of a smack didn't really stop me from acting up. Studies have shown that this type of punishment leads people (and other animals) to avoid the punishment rather than change the intended behaviour.

What did work however was the threat of having something taken away from me. I remember after a particularly vicious tantrum, my mum locked away my Star Wars figures in her cupboard for a day or two. I was on my best behaviour for the next two days and a good time after it-I didn't want to lose my favourite toys again. On a side note, she tried the same thing when I was 18 by locking away a book of mine after we had had a row. I just went and grabbed it back, and reminded her I wasn't eight anymore. She eventually saw the funny side.

One thing that does erk me is the lack of discipline these days. Discipline doesn't have to be physical but so many kids these days seem to get away with murder. I know 10 year olds with their own TV and Play Stations: hell, getting sent to your room would be fun!
 

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Re: Smacking

Ok.. time for me to say my little piece on this

I was smacked as a child and I have turned out good, I am not violent, do not have violent mood swings nor do I attack other people.

Second, I am a primary school teacher and I see the effects of both sides of the story. First of all children who are abused through being violently assaulted, also children need discipline, which is something that seems to be sadly lacking today. Children have no respect because they know that no matter what they do there will be no direct consequences. I firmly believe that we need to bring back some sense of stability and respect back into the school system.

I know that most will disagree with me, but I believe that we should bring back corporal punishment in schools. I grew up with that in my school days, and I believe it is what kept me in line and gave the respect that I have for the older generation to this very day.
 
When my brother and I were younger, whenever we got in trouble, we got the wooden spoon, or fined pocket money or were denied things and believe me, you soon learn what's right and what's wrong when you don't have the things you like or want!! ;);)

Cheers!! :cool:
SeinDude
 
Originally posted by Bloodstained Angel

... and of course girls should never ever be hit at all.

so, in my family its was policy to whack a 7-12 yo boy but only if the crime was very serious.
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Good to hear that sexism is still being taught in the family.:rolleyes:

I do not agree with smacking a child (boy or girl). I cannot understand how violence can solve problems. However, if you feel justified in smacking a son then the same situation should exist for a daughter. Girls shouldn’t be treated differently based on gender alone.
 
back in my days we got the spoon even if we didnt do anything! my parents smacked me for anything. but they have to cause bloody bigfooty says so!

hail bigfooty bigfooty!



hail bloodstained angel!
 
well i definitely think that parents should NOT have the right to smack their children. :)

i mean, would U teach your child to hit others. i dont think so. so then why should parents have the right to smack their kids if most people (im hoping everyone) believe that hitting others is morally wrong.
 
Basically, I do think that smacking is okay. On the hand. When a child is between 5 and 10. Any younger and the child doesn't really understand it, any older, and a child will grow to resent the parent. And what should smacking be allowed for? Big things. Things that are important, not the little petty things, because nobody's perfect, and if adults got whacked for everything that they whack children for, they'd be outraged.

I did get smacked as a child, or "put over the knee" from the age of about 3 until I was 12. Then Dad started bringing out the belt until I was 18. While I don't agree with his parenting, I don't resent him for it anymore.

The problem is, where do you draw the line? If you allow any smacking at all, there's the risk of serious abuse going undetected. Unfortunately I think it's quite impossible to have proper rules on this. Can you say "all reasonable parents get to choose their own punishments, but those who are unreasonable are only allowed to play mindgames"? It's quite impossible, and that's unfortunate I think.
 
Originally posted by SeinDude
When my brother and I were younger, whenever we got in trouble, we got the wooden spoon, or fined pocket money or were denied things and believe me, you soon learn what's right and what's wrong when you don't have the things you like or want!! ;);)

Cheers!! :cool:
SeinDude
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Seiny I treated my kids that way, well not hitting them with the wooden spoon, but I used to threaten them with it & if they still played up I used to bang it down on the kitchen bench, it used to scare the living beejesus out of them & it usually worked, unfortunately I broke a lot of spoons & as the kids got older they used to hide them from me, so I had to turn the house upside down to find one for cooking. :D

I found depriving them from watching TV, docking them pocket money or grounding them always worked, I think violence begets violence. I think once a child gets over 6 it is better to sit down with them & discuss what is acceptable behaviour & set down rules that we could all live with.
 
Originally posted by mantis


Seiny I treated my kids that way, well not hitting them with the wooden spoon, but I used to threaten them with it & if they still played up I used to bang it down on the kitchen bench, it used to scare the living beejesus out of them & it usually worked, unfortunately I broke a lot of spoons & as the kids got older they used to hide them from me, so I had to turn the house upside down to find one for cooking. :D

I found depriving them from watching TV, docking them pocket money or grounding them always worked, I think violence begets violence. I think once a child gets over 6 it is better to sit down with them & discuss what is acceptable behaviour & set down rules that we could all live with.
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Lucky they didn't locate the whips and chains then.

:D
 

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(1) The children that smacking "works" on will be disciplined just as, or more effectively, by other sanctions.

(2) The children that do not respond readily to other consequences will generally not respond to physical violence.

(3) I think that the arguments that many people use for re-introducing corporal, and capital, punishment are silly.
"It will act as a deterrent", "It's the only language they understand" etc. Remember the good old days when you got hung for stealing a loaf of bread. Gee the crime rate must have been really low back then!!! What, it wasn't!!

SUMMARY:
The majority of people who people who will respond to corporal punishment, will also respond to other, more humane sanctions. Those that don't still won't.
 
I study children's services and yesterday the teacher said that emotional abuse is worse than physical abuse. I agree coz it has more long term effects.
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I read that in a newspaper article a while back. It has a higher rate of a child being emotionally f**ked and agressive when they get older, than the outcome of smacking a child.

I was smacked by my parents if I did something wrong as a child. It was what we knew, and it wasn't abuse. It's still not abuse. If a child will learn from a smack on the hand or the backside (a smack, not a great big wholloping punch), then so be it. It will not scar them, but it will teach them more obedience and respect.

My parents had the theory that if we got a smack, we got a hug straight afterwards. So that we knew we were still loved, but we'd done something wrong. And they'd always tell us what we'd done wrong (in a calm voice, not screaming), and why that had upset them.

Smacking is not a crime. It's not abuse (unless taken to the extreme), and I'd rather do that to my kid then call him/her stupid, and make them feel insignificant. Give them some respect for the life that they're living. Too many kids today are out of control, and abusive.......there are many reasons than a parent smacking them for their behaviour.

Just my opinion. :)
 
Originally posted by Spidergirl~RiCkChiCk
I study children's services and yesterday the teacher said that emotional abuse is worse than physical abuse. I agree coz it has more long term effects.
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I agree, but that doesn't mean physical discipline is OK or more effective than other non violent forms of punishment. The community needs to be reminded that there are parents out there who are smacking, punching, smothering, and shaking their babies and toddlers. Remember Daniel Valerio? Babies are dying on a regular basis. Child deaths are often put down to SIDS when there is some doubt over whether the child was smothered or not. Shaking a baby can cause brain damage and often results in death.
 
Originally posted by mantis


Seiny I treated my kids that way, well not hitting them with the wooden spoon, but I used to threaten them with it & if they still played up I used to bang it down on the kitchen bench, it used to scare the living beejesus out of them & it usually worked, unfortunately I broke a lot of spoons & as the kids got older they used to hide them from me, so I had to turn the house upside down to find one for cooking. :D
.
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LMAO this sounds exactly like what happens between my mum and my bro and sis and I, when we were younger of course! Come on why would my mother threaten me with a wooden spoon at 16 :D
 
Originally posted by BomberGal



LMAO this sounds exactly like what happens between my mum and my bro and sis and I, when we were younger of course! Come on why would my mother threaten me with a wooden spoon at 16 :D
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lol... actually right now the wooden spoon is looking like a BIG threat :eek:
i dunno about smacking children... they defiantely have to be punished in some way, i can't stand all those spoilt little brats dragging their mothers along by a string... children should be disciplined.
 

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