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Opinion Top 10 Worst Performances of the Decade

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Aug 19, 2012
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AFL Club
North Melbourne
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Jazz, West Indies
I should begin by saying I have lost complete belief that this season would be a positive one after the events of the last month. There were certainly signs of growth earlier, but on our biggest occasion, with hundreds upon hundreds of new/occasional fans in attendance, we decided to throw in one of our worst efforts in recent memory. The Good Friday performance last week completely shocked me to the core. How bad was that?? Like a lot of you, I had hope that we could steal this one, or at least make a strong game of it. Instead, what we dished up was disgraceful, white flag waving crap that we all have become a custom to.

But where would it rank amongst our worst since the turn of the decade? Whilst our "top 10 best" would take the best part of a minute to answer, this one has taken a serious amount of research and reminiscing. I have taken a wander down memory lane, and come up with my personal 10 worst efforts from North Melbourne since the start of 2020.

With over 90 losses, a draw and even 1 win (almost being beaten by West Coast 22 who had players they hadn't met before), there are some strong candidates to make the cut. I have no doubt missed a few and some of my takes are probably off the mark.

But I give you, the Top 10 Worst Performances of the decade.



10. Round 16, 2022
Geelong 144 - 32 North
"McKay played Forward"


Noble's 2nd last game as coach saw him make one of the most interesting positional moves in this decade, moving one of our only AFL competent defenders in McKay forward in an effort to provide a target to help Larkey. Worth a crack at some point, but maybe not when you're lining up on in-form stars in Cameron and Hawkins who go on to pile a combined 10.6 and blow us over by 112. LDU had a crack with 35 but this was one of our weakest line ups throughout the period.

The Cats would go on to win the flag, and playing them at Kardinia Park was always going to be tough, but hard to leave out a 112 point loss to the list.

9. Round 6, 2024
North 68-113 Hawks
"The Fork in the Road Game"

d54c991cc2436dd2a308c42e53b01e7b.jpg


Ahh... this game. Both teams 0-5 and at the time it was our first test against an opponent we thought were at a similar stage in our development. All week it was built up that this game would show how well the rebuild was going for both sides, and it was said that it would propel the winner to greener pastures. At quarter time, things were tight and it felt we were in the game. A high time for this lot to concede 8.3 in the 2nd and break the hearts of all the supporters. It would be North again having a shocking year, we'd have to wait longer.

Hawthorn did end up being a good side, and it really was the pumping of us this match that gained them confidence.

8. Round 7, 2023
Melbourne 139- 49 North
"Nightmare at the G"


This night started off with an 8.2 to 1.0 first quarter and housed the horrific Chom leg break, so bad that it was not fit for television screens. It was a fairly gloomy night in Melbourne, with 1/4 full G watch the Demons do what they please for the entirety of the evening, but for a late flurry of 3 majors padding the score. It had eerie similarities to an infamous Neeld Melbourne performance against Essendon in 2013, save for the lack of angry supporters at the players race post game.

7. Round 9, 2023
North 65-135 Port Adelaide
"JHF revenge game..."


It was forecasted as one of AFL.com's top 10 most exciting fixtures in the 2023 season, and for all of our supporters, this one meant a lot. Having JHF leave in the manner he did was a hammer blow, and with players verbally expressing this publicly, it was expected that this would be on. However, Clarko poured cold water over this pre match by telling JHF there were no hard feelings, and the players would follow suit in what was one of the more spineless performances across the years. A fairly mediocre Port side heads down to Hobart, strolls away with an easy 70 point win with only a bump to JHF from Zurhaar to show for it. Special shout out to Flynn Perez for committing one of the all time errors in the backline gifting a goal to Port. Clarkson would take leave during the week and it was all falling apart 3 months into his tenure.

6. Round 14, 2020
Gold Coast 91-28 North
"The Hub wasn't good for us"


gettyimages-1269657747-612x612.jpg

Couldn't have this list complete without at least one of our 2020 games, and this particular effort takes the cake. A hapless Gold Coast outfit keeps North to a goalless half, albeit in shortened games, but helps themselves to 12.19 in a night that could have been a lot worse on many counts. The bubble was a complete catastrophe, and Shaw's tenure was to come to a close shortly after. Thankfully, the shortened games meant reduced pain, and a strong reason why only 1 match makes the cut from the season.

5. Round 8, 2022
Fremantle 102-24 North
"Docker Shocker"


It was a Friday Night double header that we all looked forward to, especially considering our decent history in Perth over the years. The stodgy Dockers were surely a side we could restrict? Not quite for Noble's Roos, who allow free use of the corridor all night long for the Dockers to go through the front door and pile on the pain. A season low for inside 50s (35), another goalless half and the new president Sonja blowing up on twitter. Nice!

4. Round 3, 2022
Lions 156-48 North
"The Spray"


orgIIFsk.jpg

The infamous spray came after yet another Queensland calamity, this time against the uprising Lions that were destined for great things. In truth, you could see what we were trying to do with daring ball use into the corridor, however we were simply not up to the standard required to pull this style off. A whopping 73 turnovers was the result, and it was all too much for Dave who let them have it post match. Deservedly so, you might argue. Did they take it well? Not really.


3. Round 3, 2021
North 39-167 Bulldogs
"Bad Friday 1. Bruce Almighty"

f0d431649c7381467df211a61def7bb0.jpeg


It was the 2nd home match locked down North supporters could attend after the disastrous 2020 season, so North fans turned up in a socially distanced environment to watch the clubs largest ever loss to the Footscray/Western Bulldogs. The team highlight was the crowd going crazy to a North fast break which lead to a Nick Larkey goal, only for it to be reviewed as hitting the post. The rest of the night was nothing short of a nightmare, with Josh Bruce having his career highlight of 10.2 from 10 marks and taking McKay/Walker apart. I don't think you could ever see a bigger class disparity than this night, capped off with a 10.7 quarter against for the Dogs. Even Bevo had a crack at us in his post match interview. What a time to be alive.

2. Round 24, 2024
Hawthorn 170-46 North Melbourne
"Sayonara 2024 in style"

2aafbea7e31fa96af43865b393854f40.jpg
What better way to sign a season off in which you make marginal gains throughout the year and show some signs of life? Throw in the clubs worst ever loss to Hawthorn, in a match where you could almost hear players thinking how much they'd rather be at a beach club than in Launceston that day. Hawthorn had it all to play for to secure finals, to be fair, but the performance that was served up clarified that this group has minimal pride. A stiff candidate to miss out on the coveted first position.

Drumroll.....





1. Round 6, 2025
Carlton 153-71 North
"Bad Friday 2. The Tunnel Continues"
https://www.foxsports.com.au/afl/match-centre/AFL20250602


e4651a1d5bb8ff5c177ec11d2ae08161.jpg

The common theme amongst majority of these performances have been that we're up against strong opposition, with a young/weak outfit in and around a coaching change. This one hits different IMO given that we are up against an average outfit, missing key players, on our biggest stage of the year. The game was done at quarter time. How can this happen? It sits proudly atop the list.
 
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I should begin by saying I have lost complete belief that this season would be a positive one after the events of the last month. There were certainly signs of growth earlier, but on our biggest occasion, with hundreds upon hundreds of new/occasional fans in attendance, we decided to throw in one of our worst efforts in recent memory. The Good Friday performance last week completely shocked me to the core. How bad was that?? Like a lot of you, I had hope that we could steal this one, or at least make a strong game of it. Instead, what we dished up was disgraceful, white flag waving crap that we all have become a custom to.

But where would it rank amongst our worst since the turn of the decade? Whilst our "top 10 best" would take the best part of a minute to answer, this one has taken a serious amount of research and reminiscing. I have taken a wander down memory lane, and come up with my personal 10 worst efforts from North Melbourne since the start of 2020.

With over 90 losses, a draw and even 1 win (almost being beaten by West Coast 22 who had players they hadn't met before), there are some strong candidates to make the cut. I have no doubt missed a few and some of my takes are probably off the mark.

But I give you, the Top 10 Worst Performances of the decade.



10. Round 16, 2022
Geelong 144 - 32 North
"McKay played Forward"


Noble's 2nd last game as coach saw him make one of the most interesting positional moves in this decade, moving one of our only AFL competent defenders in McKay forward in an effort to provide a target to help Larkey. Worth a crack at some point, but maybe not when you're lining up on in-form stars in Cameron and Hawkins who go on to pile a combined 10.6 and blow us over by 112. LDU had a crack with 35 but this was one of our weakest line ups throughout the period.

The Cats would go on to win the flag, and playing them at Kardinia Park was always going to be tough, but hard to leave out a 112 point loss to the list.

9. Round 6, 2024
North 68-113 Hawks
"The Fork in the Road Game"

View attachment 2292219


Ahh... this game. Both teams 0-5 and at the time it was our first test against an opponent we thought were at a similar stage in our development. All week it was built up that this game would show how well the rebuild was going for both sides, and it was said that it would propel the winner to greener pastures. At quarter time, things were tight and it felt we were in the game. A high time for this lot to concede 8.3 in the 2nd and break the hearts of all the supporters. It would be North again having a shocking year, we'd have to wait longer.

Hawthorn did end up being a good side, and it really was the pumping of us this match that gained them confidence.

8. Round 7, 2023
Melbourne 139- 49 North
"Nightmare at the G"


This night started off with an 8.2 to 1.0 first quarter and housed the horrific Chom leg break, so bad that it was not fit for television screens. It was a fairly gloomy night in Melbourne, with 1/4 full G watch the Demons do what they please for the entirety of the evening, but for a late flurry of 3 majors padding the score. It had eerie similarities to an infamous Neeld Melbourne performance against Essendon in 2013, save for the lack of angry supporters at the players race post game.

7. Round 9, 2023
North 65-135 Port Adelaide
"JHF revenge game..."


It was forecasted as one of AFL.com's top 10 most exciting fixtures in the 2023 season, and for all of our supporters, this one meant a lot. Having JHF leave in the manner he did was a hammer blow, and with players verbally expressing this publicly, it was expected that this would be on. However, Clarko poured cold water over this pre match by telling JHF there were no hard feelings, and the players would follow suit in what was one of the more spineless performances across the years. A fairly mediocre Port side heads down to Hobart, strolls away with an easy 70 point win with only a bump to JHF from Zurhaar to show for it. Special shout out to Flynn Perez for committing one of the all time errors in the backline gifting a goal to Port. Clarkson would take leave during the week and it was all falling apart 3 months into his tenure.

6. Round 14, 2020
Gold Coast 91-28 North
"The Hub wasn't good for us"


View attachment 2292024

Couldn't have this list complete without at least one of our 2020 games, and this particular effort takes the cake. A hapless Gold Coast outfit keeps North to a goalless half, albeit in shortened games, but helps themselves to 12.19 in a night that could have been a lot worse on many counts. The bubble was a complete catastrophe, and Shaw's tenure was to come to a close shortly after. Thankfully, the shortened games meant reduced pain, and a strong reason why only 1 match makes the cut from the season.

5. Round 8, 2022
Fremantle 102-24 North
"Docker Shocker"


It was a Friday Night double header that we all looked forward to, especially considering our decent history in Perth over the years. The stodgy Dockers were surely a side we could restrict? Not quite for Noble's Roos, who allow free use of the corridor all night long for the Dockers to go through the front door and pile on the pain. A season low for inside 50s (35), another goalless half and the new president Sonja blowing up on twitter. Nice!

4. Round 3, 2023
Lions 156-48 North
"The Spray"


View attachment 2292018

The infamous spray came after yet another Queensland calamity, this time against the uprising Lions that were destined for great things. In truth, you could see what we were trying to do with daring ball use into the corridor, however we were simply not up to the standard required to pull this style off. A whopping 73 turnovers was the result, and it was all too much for Dave who let them have it post match. Deservedly so, you might argue. Did they take it well? Not really.


3. Round 3, 2021
North 39-167 Bulldogs
"Bad Friday 1. Bruce Almighty"

View attachment 2292017


It was the 2nd home match locked down North supporters could attend after the disastrous 2020 season, so North fans turned up in a socially distanced environment to watch the clubs largest ever loss to the Footscray/Western Bulldogs in our history. The team highlight was the crowd going crazy to a North fast break which lead to a Nick Larkey goal, only for it to be reviewed as hitting the post. The rest of the night was nothing short of a nightmare, with Josh Bruce having his career highlight of 10.2 from 10 marks and taking McKay/Walker apart. I don't think you could ever see a bigger class disparity than this night, capped off with a 10.7 quarter against for the Dogs. Even Bevo had a crack at us in his post match interview. What a time to be alive.

2. Round 24, 2024
Hawthorn 170-46 North Melbourne
"Sayonara 2024 in style"

View attachment 2292225
What better way to sign a season off in which you make marginal gains throughout the year and show some signs of life? Throw in the clubs worst ever loss to Hawthorn, in a match where you could almost hear players thinking how much they'd rather be at a beach club than in Launceston that day. Hawthorn had it all to play for to secure finals, to be fair, but the performance that was served up clarified that this group has minimal pride. A stiff candidate to miss out on the coveted first position.

Drumroll.....





1. Round 6, 2025
Carlton 153-71 North
"Bad Friday 2. The Tunnel Continues"
https://www.foxsports.com.au/afl/match-centre/AFL20250602


View attachment 2292236

The common theme amongst majority of these performances have been that we're up against strong opposition, with a young/weak outfit in and around a coaching change. This one hits different IMO given that we are up against an average outfit, missing key players, on our biggest stage of the year. The game was done at quarter time. How can this happen? It sits proudly atop the list.
There's a strange poetry to this. Or maybe I'm just a masochist
 

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Special mention: The round 22 game, 2024, in Hobart, vs West Coast where we were in front and then gave them the game with 18 seconds to go. o_O

This game ranks in the top 10.

we may not have been blown off the park in that game to lose how we did showed we have NFI how to win a game of football. And lead to the following 2 weeks of 96 and 120+ point beltings.

They probably happen anyway but the season was over after that last couple of minutes.
 
This game ranks in the top 10.

we may not have been blown off the park in that game to lose how we did showed we have NFI how to win a game of football. And lead to the following 2 weeks of 96 and 120+ point beltings.

They probably happen anyway but the season was over after that last couple of minutes.
Big oversight, especially considering the awful calibre of opposition.
 
What a pleasure to say I was at 6 of these 10 games. 2 I paid money to travel to as well.

As an Energy Vampire really sucked up a lot from these games

The game at number 10 nearly has to be top 5. McKay being sent back when we were 57 points down was the moment I knew Noble was not our man.

Hold steady on this list, I have a feeling this week might get added.
 
A few others just of note, more WTF than horrific losses

Round 5 2020 vs Bulldogs - Cunnington a late out? No he isn't, but can't move on the field. Some great management
Round 8 2020 vs Carlton - The end of Jared Polec, sent to tag Cripps, doesn't do it, gets dropped and a Brownlow vote
Round 10 2023 vs Sydney - How many interchange do we have left?
Round 18 2023 vs Hawthorn - few decent weeks going in (no wins mind you) and we keep them goalless in 2nd, lose by 48
Round 19 2023 vs Saints - Lead 8 goals to 4 at 3 quarter time, lose 9 goals to 8
Round 20 2023 vs Eagles - Played well week before, Eagles hapless, still beat us
 
I would also like to add a special mention to leading by 13 points at the 31 minute mark against West Coast in Hobart and losing.
The fact we are playing the way we are in 2025, after the finish to 2024 says to me this club will never change.

Shitcampaigners
 
What a pleasure to say I was at 6 of these 10 games. 2 I paid money to travel to as well.

As an Energy Vampire really sucked up a lot from these games

The game at number 10 nearly has to be top 5. McKay being sent back when we were 57 points down was the moment I knew Noble was not our man.

Hold steady on this list, I have a feeling this week might get added.
Ahh there were so many options, I had bias on others (Gather round 1&2 springs to mind) that were absolutely disgraceful but didn’t get a mention.
 

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Great research!
That got me thinking about the Rhyce Shaw some more. All we heard since his departure is that he had mental health issues due to the bad experience in the HUB. But do we actually know what went on? What has changed from such confident and physical football we played under him in 2019 with largely the same personnel?

As we scratch our heads trying to work out what is going on at the club and what cancer exists inside that playing group, maybe this is the place we have to start.
 
Appreciate the effort by the OP, but i can't read it all, as it's too depressing. I hope this is rock bottom for the club. Good Friday i left the game after we kicked the first 2 goals of the last quarter and thankfully missed the capitulation.

The lack of effort and toughness all day was so disappointing.
 
What a pleasure to say I was at 6 of these 10 games. 2 I paid money to travel to as well.

As an Energy Vampire really sucked up a lot from these games

The game at number 10 nearly has to be top 5. McKay being sent back when we were 57 points down was the moment I knew Noble was not our man.

Hold steady on this list, I have a feeling this week might get added.
Godees board still references 148 and 186 semi-regularly. This week would have to be at about that level to crack the list.

Could happen, but that's an extremely grim outcome
 

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Port are sadists who relish in randomly racking up video game scores on teams. They could be flying or in a form slump, it doesn't matter. Remember that game last year where they got to 70 before Sydney even hit the board? Humiliated the Hawks in the first half last week too. Why did it have to be them this week lmao
 
Great research!
That got me thinking about the Rhyce Shaw some more. All we heard since his departure is that he had mental health issues due to the bad experience in the HUB. But do we actually know what went on? What has changed from such confident and physical football we played under him in 2019 with largely the same personnel?

As we scratch our heads trying to work out what is going on at the club and what cancer exists inside that playing group, maybe this is the place we have to start.

I could write a book on it with what I’ve heard

When does statute of limitations end on this stuff?
 
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How's nobody mentioned the 1.8 game against Geelong. I know it's a 2019 game but ****.

Todd kicks our lone goal in the second quarter. We kicked 1.6 after quarter time and 1.8 for the match. This was deep in the era when we were routinely fielding Ahern, Pittard, Polec, Turner, Williams and Wood. Special shout-out to 2019 Cam Zurhaar putting up 2025 Cam Zurhaar numbers with 8 touches and 1 tackle to go with 5 clangers. Also didn't bother the scoreboard operators

Dangerfield 33 and a goal. We made Ablett look like prime Andrew Swallow with 10 tackles. An absolutely disgusting spectacle
 
The worst for me was the Gather Round game against Brisbane when they set the record for the most uncontested marks inside 50.
Daniher and Hipwood combined for 23 marks between them. Extraordinary

Pencil Stephenson kicked 4 and it's an indictment on him that I do not remember a single one of them.

Shout out to 2023 Cam Zurhaar putting up 2025 Cam Zurhaar numbers - 9 touches, 0.1 and 2 tackles
 

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Opinion Top 10 Worst Performances of the Decade

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