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My friend is feeding his goat and we are watching the football in his lounge room barn. He ask me, “Why team that live in wee and poo so hopeless?” “They are bad” I say. “My goat (his wife) can play better” “They have lost four finals in a row, a world record of failure!” I say. We laugh...

Too good tonight. You are playing very good football. Riewoldt you prick. Smashed us. Hannebery has been a great player for us, but he seems done. More melting to come in the swans board I’m sure. The rest of you, EABBOD.

longest ******* preview of two players. EABBOD TUGGERS!! Go Swans!!

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-06-24/exclusive-star-crow-tom-lynch-inks-new-deal I'm sure this wasn't the news Crows fans were hoping to hear. Sympathy posts will no doubt be appreciated. References to Tippett will be encouraged. #theonewedidntwanttokeep

I know I start a lot of thought provoking freds, but here’s another one. I really find the interviewing of players on the field either just before play, after the toss, when a quarter finishes, etc etc absolutely FARKING ridiculous and meaningless. I mean let’s be honest: footy players at the...

I'm not making this up. It just shows how terrible Hawforn's addiction to poker machines really is. Kudos to Melbum and Geelol for taking action. This is the journey I was taken on: Good question. I began to wonder who it might be... Mmmm, let me think. Carlton earn their money from dodgy...

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-06-20/scott-spruiks-roos-as-afl-destination-club Good to see that Brad is now out there promoting the club as a "destination". Here's what Brad had to say: Chief asked me to go along today on the tour, and so I took a few photos of the facilities that Brad...

Sorry Tuggers, but I warned you! Swans record at Shitihad Popeye Stadium: last 17 games, 16 wins. Tuggers record: Last 17 games, about 5 wins, mostly against no hopers like Brisbane and Hawforn. Also (this will bring on a second bout of spontaneous shitting of your pants): your last loss at...

Yep

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-06-14/exclusive-dive-charge-wont-change-rance Great courage from the AFL's leading Seventh Day Mormon. Rance claims that, despite being caught out diving, "I'm not going to change the way I play." Well done Alex. I'm glad you've accepted what you are, and you...

The importance being, we can beat any of youse bums on your pathetic cheat grounds, anytime, anywhere. Now back to eating your big bags of penises, thanks, bye.

I've just started this because none of the Hawfies are obviously going to. Lol Hawfies.

It’s been brought to my attention that weagles fans have been drinking a bit too much water from the mef labs, and are getting too high for no good reason. What’s worse is that this excessive use of dirty drugs is impairing your already faulty judgement on simple matters, ie the relative...

This is a serious thread, no trolling please. I’m just starting to get a feel for the top 8, and the bottom four. The middle six nobody really cares about too much... As I was watching some of the Hawforn game I began to wonder where they may end up by season’s end. Top 8 seems a distant...

im saying it loud and proud, he’s the real deal. When the swans took Mike Pyke everyone lold, they stopped loling when he took the most contested marks one year and won a flag. I don’t think the pies will win a flag anytime soon (good god imagine eddie’s purple head!) but I think they’ve done...

DDA - Dusty Don't Argue He seemed unstoppable, then the last couple of weeks, the DDA just don't work anymore? What's happened to the DDA? Has it worn off? Have players been taking karate lessons, and they've worked it out? Is Dusty any good without the DDA? I hope some Geelong fans have...

blocking in defensive 50? The broken scoreboard? Not enough frees? Yanny? Laurel? EDIT: THE WEATHER AND THE WATER!!

Where is the hawfie Lions fred?? I want to troll the Hawfies and post pics of it’s happening gifs

In all honesty, why did Ablett ask to come back? Sure, his Mrs was homesick etc etc. s**t happens. He should’ve had some little baby Jesus Ablett’s then, that would’ve kept her happy perhaps? Seriously though, many here in the bay questioned his body, and now many Geelong fans are doing the...

Will anybody care if we flog he puprple puffs? Probably not... But if the purple panties get up I’m sure this fred will get to about 5 pages, mostly filled with Hawfies already drunk on a Geelol loss.

Eat a big bag of animal penises all you conspiracy nuts, the Budwah is backwah, and so is Hanners! Could all you Hawfies who were tin foiling please step in here and have a big salty cry, thanks. Same with Freo fans who are shocked and saddened by the announcement. Thanks, db

Far queue you little midget!!! http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-05-14/longmire-takes-aim-at-clarko-over-secret-gill-meeting You pathetic wank e r. Did you miss Issac Smith's block on Grundy? Suck s**t you dibber-dobber, button mashing, fake wall punching shithead. If you want to have a cry...

I have seen an alarming trend appear since Friday night. Not only are the Hawfies squibbing it on the field when push comes to shove, but they are squibbing it in the Bay. Please feel free to discuss any relevant incidents you may have noticed since Friday night. Now I must run and be a...

I'm very, very concerned about some of the Hawfie posters? Anyone else agree?

Point 1: We were the better side - Tick Point 2: You are old and suck - Tick Point 3: You thought you were unloseable because we didn't have Buddy - LOL Point 4:You lost on your cheat ground - LOL In short, EABBOD.

the teams haven’t been announced yet, but we already know that the great man Buddy is still out with a foot injury. Post your commiserations etc. Swans are decimated by injury, they are playing on the Hawfies cheat ground, and it will rain and blow. Everything points toward a Tasmanian...

Hi Bay, I’m doing my morning constitutional at work, and one thing that gets on my goat is when I sit down to lay some db cable and I open BF and all I can see are CAT FIGHTS ALL DOWN PAGE ONE!!! Stop it. You’re ruining my morning turds. The end (of my turd)

lol Norf, they have been melting all week about Blakey nominating the Swans, now Cressa’s kids have told Norf to GAGF. Tonight’s the night LolNorfies, get in here and have an allmighty BOOOOOOOOOOOO!! The roof is open Bwad, no crying!!

http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-05-04/a-gross-breach-of-my-privacy-swan-on-leaked-tape C'mon, let's get real here for a moment. Dane Swan loved nothing more than showing shots of himself on the town and on the job, semi-naked and at shiela's houses during his career. Remember how Dane Swan...

The heating bills over on the LolNorf board must be zero, luckily, because they have no money. Here's what they are melting so hard over: http://www.afl.com.au/news/2018-05-01/blakeys-choice-swans-lions-or-kangas Come one, come all, I will drink your tears, I will bathe in them, I will...