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David Hasselhoff

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Do we love him or hate him, i personally think hes pretty good, mainly because he played an awesome character on Baywatch. But many of the boys at school worship him like the hes smuggeling sunshine in his anus. What do you think?
 

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Dont have anything against the man. He seems decent enough.

I think all the jokes are pretty funny. Keep it coming i say.
 
As soon as he became aware of his E-Fame - it died.

Bring on Chuck Norris i say!
 
F-U, did u see they fired that guy on the wresteling, i was so excited when vince mcmahon threw him into the truck, that guys ripped
 
Really love the Hoffs work in the Sponge Bob movie.


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F-U said:
OUT : The Hoff
IN : The Norris
Click to expand...

FACTS ABOUT THE CHUCK:

Chuck Norris' tears would cure cancer. Too bad he's never cried.

When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay,
but because he has run out of women.

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris
can kill him and take it.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets
the information he wants.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds
till."
After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris
instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb.
Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the
speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while
she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought
a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub.
Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered,
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck,
to remind the crew once more that the Chuck giveth, and the Chuck,
he taketh away.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks
and unparalleled martial arts ability.
Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the
devil in the face and took his soul back.
The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should
have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the
month.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the
JFK assassination.
As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting
them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift
of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day.
The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favouritism, used their
combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible.
Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck
could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and
ripped out her throat.
Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed,
"Don't @#%$ with Chuck!"
Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement
and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast
went deaf.

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths
have increased 13,000 percent.

To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15
cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of
cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes.
Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, for his pleasure.

Chuck Norris once lined up to kick the winning field goal of a
high school football game.
When the football went flat, he persuaded the referees to let him kick the
field goal with a 3 month old child.
Chuck roundhouse kicked the baby 60 yards through the uprights and
then proceeded to bang every girl in the stadium.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

The original theme song to the Transformers was actually
"Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise,"
and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth
from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up.
This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it
was divided.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate,
but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates
to him.
Pirates never were very smart.

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like
Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said,
"don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard.
He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole,
and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and
came with cranberry sauce.
When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick
to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

We once had a bachelor party for Chuck Norris. He ate the entire cake
before they could tell him there was a stripper in it

Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling,
"Bang!"

Chuck Norris doesn't need to swallow when eating food.

In one episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Chuck Norris
replaced Carlton for one scene and nobody noticed.

Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time.
It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just
a joker, a get out of jail free monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades
and a green number 4 card from the game Uno.

Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse
kicks.
So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don't be offended or hurt,
he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.

Chuck Norris invented water.

Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the blue ringed octopus
of Eastern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3
minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following
symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans,
and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
 
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living ******** out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited.

Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".

Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
 

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