Elton Johns Wig
Premiership Ruckman
- Moderator
- #1
Well, hello one and all. Doesn't time just fly right on by?
It seems only weeks ago I was decked out in those awfully tacky green and gold colours of those up themselves right side of the river bunch at the East Side Hawks....howdy fellas.
As some of you know, I headed for the high country in between seasons, up to Mt Buller. What can one say? It is certainly great for the wine collection, heat affectation will never be a problem again. And a much better climate for drinking reds. What a time to be alive.
Before we get into the cut and thrust of another season of scintillating banter, rapier sharp repartee, and general mud slinging, I'd like to draw your attention to your club, and where they fit in the scheme of the Wonderful World Of Alcohol.
I was sitting back the other day beside the fire in my Chalet, sharing a dram of Laphroaig PX Cask single malt with my good friend Rodney Dangerfield, when discussion worked it's way around to what we thought of other teams. The movements in the off season, how it would shape the coming season etc.
For some strange reason (it may have been the extra dram), thoughts swirled around this tiny brain of mine linking certain drinks to certain teams. It all spewed forth (unlike my drink, I have no trouble holding my liquor) and the results are here for all to see.
So, without further ado, your team, your drink.
Mt Buller Demons - Gluhwein -
The drink of a day on the slopes. It's not pretty. The result of the mixture using red-wine, cinnamon stick, sugar, oranges and cloves is Glühwein. Jesus H Christ!! It actually looks like spew if you drink too much red. Basically, a whole lot of crap thrown together that never really works, just like the Demons.
Fighting Furies - Crown Lager -
The beer that used to be premium, and it's just not. Glorified VB. Overpriced, bland, but dressed up to look all special. For years CUB pulled the wool over our eyes, but with the influx of superior product, we see the furies for what they are, a bogan version of fools gold.
Dragons FFC - Sierra Tequila -
This is a club responsible for Rednesday. So they are sort of the SFA's version of a frat party. Grown up but not. God help us if they ever lose Hate. Can you imagine what Blaze Storm would do without parental supervision? So yeah, cheap tequila, shots, and I'd back Blaze for the worm.
Sin City Swamprats - Grey Goose -
Sin City, the city that dead set thinks it's better than anyone else. All froth, no bubble. Brands are important to tossers like this, they really are. The sort of people who buy a BMW X5 for $80k more than a Mazda CX9 when it's not even $20k better as a car. w***ers. So think vodka. Grey Goose. Don't get me wrong, it's good vodka, but **** me, it's over priced and pretentious. And it's a goose. Oh really??
Baghdad Bombers - Emu Export -
It tastes like camels piss. Enough said. Not wasting more oxygen on this bunch of thieves, it only feeds them
West Coast Wonders - West Coast Coolers -
Some jokes just write themselves don't they? An irrelevant drink that most of you had forgotten about, much like this team. And shit, that too. Next
The Roys - Cognac -
These guys you can just imagine. A bunch of fossils, retired to the study where they recline on their Chesterfield sofa, a snifter of Cognac in hand, probably a gift from Louis XV, with a Cuban rolled between virgin thighs, reminiscing of the good old days.
Gold City Royals - Passiona with Vodka -
Holy Shit!! Go to the S24 team thread. Have you seen that purple and yellow?? Wear a welding shield just to be safe!! My eyes, my eyes!! Than can be no doubt, none at all, that they were either drunk or on LSD when they designed that abomination!!
The Gumbies - Riesling -
A hard bunch to place. Irrelevant for a long, long time. An absolute train wreck, but with a core down there now trying their darnedest to regain relevance. A bit like Riesling. Every year, we hear it's back. It's back!! It's back!! they cry. We're back!! We're back!! they cry........we'll see.
Coney Island Warriors - A Frozen Margharita -
When I played the Warriors last season, they were kind of fun, but something you only try once. Left a funny taste. Must check whats in it next time. You order these at the end of the night when you are blind and the bird you are trying to pick up orders one, so you get one thi nking it will help you get laid. It won't. It was a bad idea then, and it's a bad idea now.
East Side Hawks - Goon Bag-
Something you drink only when you are desperate. I didn't know any better. I do now. I'm outta there. BRAB is desperate, he joined. TFW once had a goon head as his Av, what was that all about?
Las Vegas Bears - Honey Mead -
I mean, what else does a Bear drink but honey? Also, it's cheap, nasty, and you wouldn't touch it with a barge pole if you could avoid it. Much like a Las Vegas stripper. After losing all their money in a shit stadium deal, then gambling the rest on 26 black, mead is all they can afford. Mind you, blowing your cash on hookers, coke and booze would be a hell of a way to go....
There it is.
Really looking forward to season 24, the first one's on me!!
It seems only weeks ago I was decked out in those awfully tacky green and gold colours of those up themselves right side of the river bunch at the East Side Hawks....howdy fellas.
As some of you know, I headed for the high country in between seasons, up to Mt Buller. What can one say? It is certainly great for the wine collection, heat affectation will never be a problem again. And a much better climate for drinking reds. What a time to be alive.
Before we get into the cut and thrust of another season of scintillating banter, rapier sharp repartee, and general mud slinging, I'd like to draw your attention to your club, and where they fit in the scheme of the Wonderful World Of Alcohol.
I was sitting back the other day beside the fire in my Chalet, sharing a dram of Laphroaig PX Cask single malt with my good friend Rodney Dangerfield, when discussion worked it's way around to what we thought of other teams. The movements in the off season, how it would shape the coming season etc.
For some strange reason (it may have been the extra dram), thoughts swirled around this tiny brain of mine linking certain drinks to certain teams. It all spewed forth (unlike my drink, I have no trouble holding my liquor) and the results are here for all to see.
So, without further ado, your team, your drink.
Mt Buller Demons - Gluhwein -
The drink of a day on the slopes. It's not pretty. The result of the mixture using red-wine, cinnamon stick, sugar, oranges and cloves is Glühwein. Jesus H Christ!! It actually looks like spew if you drink too much red. Basically, a whole lot of crap thrown together that never really works, just like the Demons.
Fighting Furies - Crown Lager -
The beer that used to be premium, and it's just not. Glorified VB. Overpriced, bland, but dressed up to look all special. For years CUB pulled the wool over our eyes, but with the influx of superior product, we see the furies for what they are, a bogan version of fools gold.
Dragons FFC - Sierra Tequila -
This is a club responsible for Rednesday. So they are sort of the SFA's version of a frat party. Grown up but not. God help us if they ever lose Hate. Can you imagine what Blaze Storm would do without parental supervision? So yeah, cheap tequila, shots, and I'd back Blaze for the worm.
Sin City Swamprats - Grey Goose -
Sin City, the city that dead set thinks it's better than anyone else. All froth, no bubble. Brands are important to tossers like this, they really are. The sort of people who buy a BMW X5 for $80k more than a Mazda CX9 when it's not even $20k better as a car. w***ers. So think vodka. Grey Goose. Don't get me wrong, it's good vodka, but **** me, it's over priced and pretentious. And it's a goose. Oh really??
Baghdad Bombers - Emu Export -
It tastes like camels piss. Enough said. Not wasting more oxygen on this bunch of thieves, it only feeds them
West Coast Wonders - West Coast Coolers -
Some jokes just write themselves don't they? An irrelevant drink that most of you had forgotten about, much like this team. And shit, that too. Next
The Roys - Cognac -
These guys you can just imagine. A bunch of fossils, retired to the study where they recline on their Chesterfield sofa, a snifter of Cognac in hand, probably a gift from Louis XV, with a Cuban rolled between virgin thighs, reminiscing of the good old days.
Gold City Royals - Passiona with Vodka -
Holy Shit!! Go to the S24 team thread. Have you seen that purple and yellow?? Wear a welding shield just to be safe!! My eyes, my eyes!! Than can be no doubt, none at all, that they were either drunk or on LSD when they designed that abomination!!
The Gumbies - Riesling -
A hard bunch to place. Irrelevant for a long, long time. An absolute train wreck, but with a core down there now trying their darnedest to regain relevance. A bit like Riesling. Every year, we hear it's back. It's back!! It's back!! they cry. We're back!! We're back!! they cry........we'll see.
Coney Island Warriors - A Frozen Margharita -
When I played the Warriors last season, they were kind of fun, but something you only try once. Left a funny taste. Must check whats in it next time. You order these at the end of the night when you are blind and the bird you are trying to pick up orders one, so you get one thi nking it will help you get laid. It won't. It was a bad idea then, and it's a bad idea now.
East Side Hawks - Goon Bag-
Something you drink only when you are desperate. I didn't know any better. I do now. I'm outta there. BRAB is desperate, he joined. TFW once had a goon head as his Av, what was that all about?
Las Vegas Bears - Honey Mead -
I mean, what else does a Bear drink but honey? Also, it's cheap, nasty, and you wouldn't touch it with a barge pole if you could avoid it. Much like a Las Vegas stripper. After losing all their money in a shit stadium deal, then gambling the rest on 26 black, mead is all they can afford. Mind you, blowing your cash on hookers, coke and booze would be a hell of a way to go....
There it is.
Really looking forward to season 24, the first one's on me!!
