Vintage Bay Famous villains who are actually nicer guys than James Hird.

[This Is Anfield]

Who: Sauron
Famous for: Trying to turn Middle-Earth into a devastated wasteland and basically destroy humanity.
Occupation: Personification of Evil.
Advantage over James Hird: Took full responsibility for his actions and nicer jewellery.

 

[ChappyUK]

Who: Dr Zaius
Famous for: Scientist in Planet of the Apes
Occupation: Scientist
Advantage over James Hird: Only experimented on Apes.

 

[This Is Anfield]

Who: Evil Roy Slade
Famous for: Being the meanest villain in the West.
Occupation: Meanest villain in the West.
Advantage over James Hird: Looks so much better in black, eventually settled down to raise a nicer family than the Hirds.

 

[Big Cox 88]

Who: Eddie McGuire
Famous for: Collingwood president, who wants to be a millionaire, chins, calling AOTY an ape, red faced grand final loser, tears
Occupation: President, Press red for Ed, TV host
Advantage over James Hird: Holds himself accountable and is slightly less egotistical.

 

[Big Cox 88]

Who: Heretier "Prince" Lumumba
Famous for: Being a prince, playing "accountable" football at Collingwood, preaching to the masses, being shot at in Brazil.
Occupation: Soon to be on welfare
Advantage over James Hird: None - Must be on the juice to pull the piss like he does.

 

[ChappyUK]

Who: Mr Hanky
Famous for: Being a likeable piece of s**t.
Occupation: Christmas Poo
Advantage over James Hird Is likeable

 

[RodneyMaynard]

Who: Zoran Lazarević, antagonist in Uncharted 2: Among Thieves
Famous for: Genocide, invading Shangri-la
Occupation: Soviet Bloc warlord
Advantage over James Hird: Didn't force his soldiers to injest the physically altering substance that was his ultimate downfall

 

[Tyler Durden007]

Who: Snake Plisken
Famous for: Escaping from New York
Occupation: Criminal turned rescuer
Advantage over James Hird: Had a conscience

 

[Tyler Durden007]

Who: Mike Ehmmantraut
Famous for: trying to keep Walter White in line and looking after his grandaughter
Occupation: Enforcer for Gus Fring ('till he got wasted by Walter White)
Advantage over James Hird: When it was his time he went peacefully

 

[Tyler Durden007]

Who: The Salamanca cousins
Famous for: Not talking, killing in cold blood
Occupation: Drug cartel enforcers
Advantage over James Hird: Never talked bullshit

 

[Tyler Durden007]

Who: Top Dollar (The Crow)
Famous for: Brutal crimes and being an ugly mother *er
Occupation: Crime overlord
Advantage over James Hird : More luxurious hair

 

[Tyler Durden007]

Who: Captain Cho (Red Dawn.. the new one)
Famous for: Inexplicably invading the US and A from a small nation half a world away with a magic phone that shut down the entire electricity grid and telecommunications
Occupation: Wizard
Advantage over James Hird : Has a better boss

 

[This Is Anfield]

Who: Gru from Despicable Me
Famous for: For looking like Little and being Despicable
Occupation: Being Despicable
Advantage over James Hird: Less Despicable than Hird

And he gave us the

 

[HoopsAhoy]

Who: Captain Byron T. Hadley.
Famous for: Sadistic prison guard from 'The Shawshank Redemption'.
Occupation: Sadistic and corrupt prison guard.
Advantage over James Hird: Took his responsibilities seriously, knew how to run his prison and has much better quotes. e.g. "You eat when we say you eat. You s**t when we say you s**t. You piss when we say you piss. You got that, you maggot dick mother*er?"

 

[royals1922]

Who: Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow aka Bonnie and Clyde
Famous for: Wreaking havoc in 1930s America and being natural born killers
Occupation: Criminals who killed for relatively little return
Advantage over James Hird: Dressed better

 

[maximillio]

Who: Wicked witch of the west
Famous for: terrifying children the world over for75 years
Occupation: witchcraft
Advantage over James Hird: didn't resort to illegal tanning injections to change her complexiont.

 

[B0SK]

Who: ACL knee injuries
Famous for: Crueling the football careers of our best & bravest
Occupation: Proving the footy gods are fickle masters
Advantage over James Hird: Less damaging to players' careers

 

[This Is Anfield]

Who: The Alien
Famous for: Scaring the s**t out of me years ago and keeping Ripley in her undies for a while longer.
Occupation: Scary Space Monster.
Advantage over James Hird: Not responsible for injecting into people, responsible for ejecting out of people.

 

[oogac]

Who: Giant Breast
Famous for: Terrorizing the country side in the Woody Allen Movie ... Everything you wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask
Occupation: Mammary
Advantage over James Hird: Les Norton likes this

 

[royals1922]

Who: Lawrence Jamison and Freddy Benson
Famous for: Being dirty rotten scoundrels and passing off themselves as royalty ( Use the toilet prince Ruprecht)
Occupation: Conmen
Advantage over James Hird: At least when they act in their best interests, they do so charmingly

 

[vjknight]

Who: Giant Breast
Famous for: Terrorizing the country side in the Woody Allen Movie ... Everything you wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask
Occupation: Mammary
Advantage over James Hird: Les Norton likes this

[/QUOTE]

 

[Les Norton]

Who: Justin Bieber
Famous for: Pissing in a bucket, spitting on fans, coveting thy neighbours wife, and other good Christian things............ apparently he "sings" too
Occupation: The most American Canadian ever
Advantage over Hird: Will be irrelevant once his fans hit puberty, doesn't threaten legal action when he ****s up

Hird may be the biggest campaigner in AFL history, but surely he's better than this *******.

I'll come up with some villains shortly after I've read through the remaining 25 or so pages. This thread is a ******* cracker by the way Bosk

 

[This Is Anfield]

Who: Giant Breast
Famous for: Terrorizing the country side in the Woody Allen Movie ... Everything you wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask
Occupation: Mammary
Advantage over James Hird: Les Norton likes this

Haha! What a brilliant, and under rated, movie.
Love this thread.

 

[Chameleon75]

Who: Joaquin Archivaldo Guzman Lorea AKA "El Chapo" Guzman
Famous for: Drug trafficking, murder, bribery, extortion, terrorism
Occupation: Head of the Sinaloa Drug Cartel
Advantage over James Hird: At least he knows what's in the taco juice

 

[This Is Anfield]

Who: A minor inconvenience for women, a death threatening "man flu" for us.
Famous for: Runny noses, aches and pains and countless hours of lost productivity.
Occupation: Misery provider
Advantage over James Hird: Vitamin C injections (Hello Mark McVeigh) are actually good for you.