Neighbours, everybody needs good neighbours

[sosos]

People were posting some neighbour stories on the "Things That Shit Me" thread. The stories went for page after page, and I was about to reply when I realised my post could be pages long as well so I thought that might mean it could use it's own thread. So not just annoying neighbours, but please, any interesting, or funny stories are welcome as well.

I'll kick off my litany of stories with one from the first rental house my wife to be and I moved in to together in Coburg, Melbourne.

It was a busy two-way, single lane road, with a bus line and our house was two doors away from the corner of one of the side streets. A lovely elderly Italian couple in the corner house would park either down the side street or in their garage. Our house was level with a single car spot in front of the house. Looking at the road, to the left was a curb, that sat in front of our lovely neighbours' house on the left. To the right, car spots went down the road to the next side street. It's clear there is basically one spot per house.
his newly arrived neighbours, no response to a friendly greeting.

We'd noticed that if our car wasn't home, he would sometimes park his shit-box in "his" spot, but closer and closer to "our" spot, making it harder and harder to get our car into "our" space. One day, I'm at home and my wife-to-be comes flying into the house, angrier than I had ever seen her, swearing worse than I'd ever heard.

So this guy had been sitting in his car, in "his" nominal spot. I wouldn't put it past him that he was actually waiting. And as she pulled up in front of the spot, in preparation to reverse park into "our" spot, he started to edge forward to make it more and more difficult for her to get in to the spot. It was peak hour, with buses and cars going past, it's a pressure parking event, no matter what else was going on, and this guy was essentially trying to spook her into a mistake. And each time she would start to swing in, he would edge closer.

We lived there a year, and he never looked at us, spoke to us, or acknowledged our presence in any way, shape or form. These days, I understand there might have been other things behind the behaviour, but at the time, it was one of the weirdest, most passively aggressive things I'd ever seen.

 

[Shell]

What a ****ing psycho.

I had similar issues with my dumb campaigner neighbours at our old house. This guy had some porche or some sporty thing, he would park it in front of our place- which is fair enough- he has every right to do that. But hed park it in the MIDDLE of the ****ing space. Im assuming because "oh my car is so ****ing special i dont want anyone parking near it" kind of thing.

He was once standing out front of his house.

His car was in the middle again- i parked my car in front, JUST... took me 3-4 goes, getting in there, being careful not to touch his ****ing car. My car fit, i know it would, cause his cars small it cant take up that much space even in the middle.

He's still watching. I park the car. He comes over (not saying a word to me), gets in his car and moves it.

Absolute. ****ing. tool.

 

[the_interloper]

My neighbours are good on the whole, one of the left is a bit of a ********. Had to get a fence last year, that was annoying having to co-operate with them, now that's done we don't need to talk again which is good.

 

[cats_09]

My neighbours are good on the whole, one of the left is a bit of a ********. Had to get a fence last year, that was annoying having to co-operate with them, now that's done we don't need to talk again which is good.

Similar situation last year in getting fences replaced but had 5 neighbours to deal with

The 3 neighbours along the back fence were good, our neighbour on the right was good and the one on the left initially agreed - then when we tried to get the signed paperwork off them so that the work could be gone, he went off his head and the best decision as to drop it.

It was an expletive field rant, "no ones coming onto my property", "no ones entering my house" and all that type of stuff - never mind that they really wouldn't have had to do any of that because the panelling is on our side

So there's nice new fences on 2 sides and the crappy old fence which is broken & falling down on the other

But this guys been a neighbour for 5/6 years and barely spoken to him which is the best option - the pervious neighbours were an elderly couple and everything was emaculate, from the yards which were inviting to inside the house and they were just such a lovely couple, and then this dick moved in. It was actually his mother who bought the house for him & she made things so hard for our neighbours:
- House is too expensive, I need you to lower the price
- A list of about 10 issues with the house such as the wardrobe door squeaking so it needed repairing before she'd buy
As they were in something of a need to sell they did what they could - which there was more interest so they could have told her to stick it.

Front & back yards are overgrown - I think the front yard was mowed twice last year, there was a path to the front door but you wouldn't know it with how overgrown everything is

A couple of weeks ago, our neighbour on the other side was out in her garden one afternoon when she heard a noise in the tree - said it was the biggest rat she'd ever seen and no doubt it had come from his place as it doesn't look like he's mowed the grass in the backyard for a few years

He used to have a cat and it was essentially a wild tom cat - it would be out at all hours of the night, it tormented our cat and a couple of times was almost entering our house when it would sit on the step of the backdoor

Our other neighbour who was happy with the fence replacement has a beautiful border collie and as a puppy she would go next-door and the elderly couple would let her in to give her a biscuit before she'd return home. Not long after moving in, this dick was riding his bike & threatened to kick the dog in the head if she came near his place.

We could lodge council complaints about these things such as the cat a few years ago, the overgrown yard and there's even a form that can be filled out to force the fence to be replaced - problem with all those situations is that you have to give personal details such as name, phone number etc and we don't want this guy to have access to that stuff

But the Geelong Council is frustrating at the best of times - not long after this dick moved in, one rubbish day a syringe was found just outside his place on the road (obviously came out of his bin), and the council response was "well could you please pick it up or notify him", nope not doing that, they can do that

 

[Roobs321]

Current neighbours are chill but we just got a fence put in so even more secluded now

 

[sosos]

Parking, pets and fences.....some common themes.

We got an awesome new fence with one neighbour. Nice and high. Then we sorted out one with the other neighbour, similar height. Only we didn't realise there was a step down to their land, so the fence is over a foot lower than what I thought it was going to be.

Put up an extension, but the missus next door hated it, blocked her view and let us know. Loudly. The bloke was cool and said we could leave it but I took it down anyway, best to avoid the stress. Now we're growing big boxes of bamboo, try to shield them out!

 

[Scotland]

We used to have neighbours at our shitty rental who would always park on our verge. Used to drive us nuts as we had 3 cars and only parking for 2 cars one behind the other and you couldn't street park so having one on the verge and one in the driveway made it easy for people to come and go, then whoever came home last would just check who was first out the next day.

But no, dickhead(s) next door had to park on our verge because they had money and were renovating and needed their driveway clear and **** the share house losers next door. We didn't go full passive aggressive and just asked them politely not to do it. And then they would just do it again anyway. Once they finished their renovations and put turf on their section of verge we parked there on purpose and they got the shits. Suffer in your jocks, ya dickhead.

 

[Reynolds Number]

That's how neighbours become good friends.

 

[Perth gal]

My last set of neighbors before this house was a couple with small kids l I was scared of the wife, she had a real fishwife voice . Every day they would go for a walk with their dog, every day they wouldn’t put it on a lead, every day they would scream at it to come back. How that dog didn’t get run over is beyond me. They didn’t shut the door they slammed it. At least 30 time’s a day. The couple on the other side were weirdos who hardly ever went anywhere. One time the dude decided he would build a wall and fence between our property. I didnt have an issue with that. What I did have an issue with was him ripping out a plant on my property to build it and just going on my side of the property to build and paint it. After about the 5 th time I went out and ripped him a new one. Hated those neighbors. My current ones are so much better. Hardly see them but when I do we say a friendly hello.

 

[HBF]

Pretty happy with mine. One side is an older married couple who spend alot of the year away in their caravan. Some days it does look like a used car lot as they have a few kids who all visit at once when they are home. My other neighbours are a family with two teenage kids who pretty much keep to themselves.

 

[sosos]

We used to have neighbours at our shitty rental who would always park on our verge. Used to drive us nuts as we had 3 cars and only parking for 2 cars one behind the other and you couldn't street park so having one on the verge and one in the driveway made it easy for people to come and go, then whoever came home last would just check who was first out the next day.

But no, dickhead(s) next door had to park on our verge because they had money and were renovating and needed their driveway clear and fu** the share house losers next door. We didn't go full passive aggressive and just asked them politely not to do it. And then they would just do it again anyway. Once they finished their renovations and put turf on their section of verge we parked there on purpose and they got the shits. Suffer in your jocks, ya dickhead.

I was a long time renting before finally buying a house so I have lots of sympathy for renters. But the house across the road, the landlord is a piece of &^%$ and he turfed out the nice people living there. Now we have drug dealing mechanics. So the verge is covered in cars of varying repair, and the customers park all over the street. I've got a big station wagon, and I am finding it harder and harder to park in my driveway or on our verge.

The rest of the street are all pretty cool, although we don't talk politics anymore. Very lucky, it's a real lottery when you move house.

 

[Engimal v3]

Lived in 4 places in Melbourne, and yet to meet a single one of my neighbours.

 

[sosos]

Lived in 4 places in Melbourne, and yet to meet a single one of my neighbours.

Anyone nod as you walk past each other?

 

[sosos]

In case anyone thinks I'm an archetypal good neighbour, I play music, and me and my bands would occasionally rehearse in the suburban streets , although it must be noted, we never assaulted our neighbours with this on any kind of regular basis. We never got any feedback, I guess if we were virtuosi, there may have been some but I think most times, our neighbours just put up with it, praying we'd stop soon.

One sunny Sunday afternoon, my heavy band was jamming in my bedroom at the front of a big, old, dilapidated share house in Westgarth - a little enclave in Northcote for those unfamiliar with the area. My girlfriend at the time knocked on the door during a break in the songs to say I'd better come out the front because someone wanted to talk to me.

Me and and my disheveled band mates wandered out into the afternoon sun, down to the front gate. An elderly gentleman I had seen before walking his mangy dog slowly around the streets was standing there, glaring at us. In my travels around the area previously, I had ^^nodded^^ at him in greeting before to a stony glare, so I knew what was coming wasn't going to be a record contract, or a request for an autograph.

He looked at me with wild, mad eyes, lifted his stick towards my face, shook it slightly as he uttered in a germanic accent: "What you are doing is evil!"

I cannot remember what happened afterwards, whether we went back in to destroy the neighbourly peace some more, or whether we cowered back in fear and packed up our jam, but fair to say that vision, the sentence, with all the intonation intact has stuck with me for a very long time since.

 

[sosos]

I just woke up and remembered a little bit of what happened after. He just finished the sentence, then simply turned and walked slowly away.

The ultimate last word.

And all we did was stand there, like stunned metalhead mullets.

 

[Shell]

That neighbour sounds awesome.


Or- like Joseph Fritzl.

one or the other

 

[Catfish Alley]

Ours a good. We're in a cul-de-sac and everybody will say hi. Next door neighbor will bring the bins in for me which is nice. We have a few of them over occasionally but we're the youngest on the street. On occasion people will get together out the front and have a beer, watch kids play etc.

 

[Shell]

Cul de sacs are awesome. Lived in one for 12 years.

 

[sosos]

Yeah, we're in a cul-de-sac too.. Same with the beers and the bins, it's awesome. We even have a christmas party and take over the street once a year.

That's how we knew our new renters were NQR when they didn't attend after invitations went out.

 

[Scotland]

People are weird about bins and verge collection.

If I put something out for verge collection, have at it. It's there because I don't want it and don't think I can sell it/give it away. Just don't spread my neat pile out across the street.

If it's bin night and I put my bin out, so long as you put the right stuff in the right bin then fill it up as much as you want. Sometimes you have a party and have heaps of empties to get rid of, or you renovate a room and have some extra rubbish to get rid of but not enough to warrant getting a skip. If my bin is sitting there 1/3 full then why the hell would I be precious about it? It's not even my bin it belongs to the council. The truck comes once a week and empties all the bins, whether they are empty or full makes no difference. If my neighbours were having a party I would offer them my bins. It's a pain in the arse having excess rubbish sitting around for an extra week.

I have my bins behind a gate normally though so if they are there then no touchy touchy.

 

[ioppolo]

I live in between two older married couples who are both retired. One set barely leave the house, or even go out the front or back at all as far as I can tell. The other side are probably the friendliest on the street, had many a chat with them.

The three houses across the road are also awesome. All friendly enough and not shit heads. One chick has one of those loud, booming bogan voices but I don't hear it unless she's out the front

 

[Billy ray]

Agree its usually about parking, pets, fences and bins.
I’m lucky where i live now that you cannot have pets, there are no fences, bins are large ones located in a single spot at the entrance (near where mailboxes are also) and there is an abundance of parking for everyone.

but there are still a few idiots. Most problems where i am are people speeding. Speed limit is either 25 or 40 depending where you are and some people (not always young p platers but majority are) who speed around and end up killing wildlife.

 

[sosos]

Agree its usually about parking, pets, fences and bins.
I’m lucky where i live now that you cannot have pets, there are no fences, bins are large ones located in a single spot at the entrance (near where mailboxes are also) and there is an abundance of parking for everyone.

but there are still a few idiots. Most problems where i am are people speeding. Speed limit is either 25 or 40 depending where you are and some people (not always young p platers but majority are) who speed around and end up killing wildlife.

Yeah, detest the speed freaks in a court, with young kids around, it's just dumb and arrogant.

Another common issue with neighbours is trees. We have a birch I should probably get taken out as I may have a bit of an allergy. But the guy out the back has a pool and he says it drops crap in it. I took off a branch one year, but I guess higher up ones are doing similar.

Only thing stopping me is it will leave a bare, ugly hole until a replacement grows which might take years, depending what we choose. We also had a baby magpie drop out of a nest up there last year, so expect the parents to come back this year. Super cool having one bop around the backyard, though we had to keep the dog inside for a week until it made its way out into the rest of the world.

I was half dreaming of chopping it down and using the wood to make a new axe handle for my grandpa's old axe which I broke
Found this website which inspired me. Birch is not a bad option. Only Australian wood suitable is spotted gum - might try and find some of that if I ever get around to doing it:

How to Carve an Axe Handle from a Log

Making an axe handle is an old skill from long before you could purchase a pre-finished handle from the hardware store. Use this guide to master this old skill.

www.artofmanliness.com

.

 

[RolandF1]

Agree its usually about parking, pets, fences and bins.

Heh. I originally had neighbours who I argued with about the cost of a fence retaining wall . They felt I should cover half of the retaining wall cost and pay them an idiotic amount in labour to do it themselves, despite them choosing to build their house up. They weren't professionals.

Many years later, after renting the place out for a while, his ex wife and boyfriend moved in for a time while the place is getting sold (the story of that break up is something so unbelievable that I don't mention to others because it sounds like bullshit). He got caught drink driving or similar as he couldn't drive his tradie ute and left it in their driveway. They then decide to constantly park their other car in front of my place despite it being a very dangerous spot to park due to it being a blind spot with a fast corner and being the only place I can put my garbage bins. All other neighbours understood this for many years despite it being technically a legal park and I had so many near misses of two cars colliding on my security camera that it was an obvious hazard. I didn't use it myself and had intended on getting it marked as no parking but kept putting it off as it wasn't much of an issue before. However these neighbours didn't care or were looking for insurance money.

At the time, I couldn't put my bins on my driveway as I drove to work and no where to park quickly without blocking traffic. I was putting my bins out when they werent parked out front the previous night when I would pull out in the morning either find the bins moved to block my driveway, positioned in an illegal spot or they had just blocked with their car in front of them.

Then they started parking and partially blocking my driveway. I let to go for a time until one day it blocked me in so badly it was obvious what they were doing and I called the council to get them ticketed. **** that.

I caught them on my security camera later looking at my place a couple of time, seeing what they could do in retaliation. One day I found a whole bunch of fresh dog shit of my driveway and front door. It had been flung from their side and not in view of my cameras. They probably didn't realise my camera system is very flexible so I position one camera their way which just so happened to give me full view of the front their house. Suddenly, I was Big Brother with the potential of live streaming on YouTube. No more blocking my driveway, no more driving cars without a license, less of their loud and obnoxious visitors, and no more dog shit. The occasional middle finger but can only laugh at that. Dog shit mysteriously resurfaced on their backyard picnic table. Must have been the wind. The moving days they were on their best behaviour.

I submitted an application to the Council about the car spot in front of my place, and they agreed to make it no parking.

New neighbours are absolutely fine and thankfully no need for the Big Brother shit.

So yes, parking, pets, fences and bins.

 

[Shell]

A nice story for once.

Cut a long story short in long af lockdown last year i made a doggie friend called Scratchy. Xmas eve i dropped off a treat in the mailbox + card telling his owners about it + merry xmas. Well, today I was in the area and walking past, and the whole family was out the front yard.

Introduced myself.. "OOOOOH YOU"RE MICHELLE!!!!!!"

They loved it. They even wrote a note and stuck it outside, saying thank you, but I explained I didnt see it cause I went away to the beach after xmas. Absolutely lovely family. So happy rn. And Scratchy loved his gourmet beef treat.