Social etiquette.

[A Swallow]

Similar to another recent thread, I was after people's thoughts on the following social situation.

My mate is getting engaged, and for some incredibly annoying reason has decided to host the engagement party today. Of all days. Now I have known him since we were about 8, grew up at each other's houses, but since about year 11 grew apart and since school finished 4 years ago, we rarely speak. He is no longer mates with any of the lads we hung out with at school (I still am but none of them were invited), so I will know next to no one aside from him and his family at the event. However, I am definitely making an appearance as I know his family so well. It starts at 7pm, by which stage I will be 4/5 comatose, and is being held 35 minutes from the big loose BBQ I will be at for the game today. There will be 40-50 attending said BBQ, so naturally it will turn into a messy event and kick straight through until the NRL GF tomorrow. Now I will probably be cabbing it to & from the engagement party, at some cost, as I would prefer that to not drinking all day today.

My question is this, what is the shortest time I have to be present at the engagement party before it is acceptable to bail? And have you been in a situation like this before? What excuse/tactic did you use to Houdini it?

 

[exe ex machina]

My question is this, what is the shortest time I have to be present at the engagement party before it is acceptable to bail?

Depends how quickly you can get yourself caught in a compromising situation with the bride-to-be or one of their mothers/aunties/sisters/cousins attending.

 

[A Swallow]

Well now you're just putting ideas in my head. If this ends up as a story in the Awkward Flirting Stories thread, I hold you entirely responsible.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

Just let me consult my handbook...

12 minutes for every 1/5 comatose you are. Look at it this way, it's Grand Final day. This bloke has done you a serious misdeed. If you show up 4.5/5 sloshed and still make an appearance, your 6 minute stint is bound to be full of hilarity and give the rest of the guests something to chat about after you leave. "Who the **** was that guy, he's awesome." A 12 minute stay seems very fair. Bring him a beer as a gift, say your congrats, say you think the bride-to-be is a good sort (even if she's not....or if it's a he, not that there's anything wrong with that), and decamp in the direction of the still-idling cab out the front.

 

[Poseidon]

The Hamish and Andy trick: get in as many photos as you can to give the illusion you were there for ages.

 

[exe ex machina]

Since he's gotten with this girl, she's obviously reined him in, the reason why he hasn't been close and has distanced himself from you and your friends for 4+ years. That's what fiancees often do, keep them away from bad elements/influences. You say you're still close with his family. So probably the best inappropriateness is seducing one of the girl's extended family then -- you're not gonna be a long-term friend of his and his wife's anyway, so there wont be any backlash anyway. And the plus is you can then tell all your mates (that were not invited) about your escapades and be a legend for several years. Don't do it drunkenly embarrassing tho. Do it like a boss, with fearless charm, and remember it's all about getting caught out. Instead of this day being some meh memory in your life because you politely appropriately excused yourself, make a funny/cool lasting memory for your life.

 

[neroblack]

I wouldn't go. Simple as that. Not saying that I would say I'll go to the engagement party and then not turn up, but once I was at the BBQ I'm sure it would just turn out that way. It's a really, really dumb idea trying to have an engagement party compete with the grand final. People don't want to have to be anywhere tonight..just enjoy the BBQ

 

[Gasometer]

See the things that shit me thread:-

blues4flag said: ↑

The report's due Monday and is worth an entire subject by itself. Unfortunately I need to do well if I aim to graduate with distinction (which remains a pesky 0.2% out of my grasp). If it wasn't a group project I'd definitely watch the footy but unfortunately there's 4 of us and working individually at this stage just isn't an option.

Hopefully can be home by 3-4pm and watch the 2nd half but will depend on how much work we get done tomorrow.​

"Oh I have to take this call. Hi Mum/Dad/Grandpa/ma. Oh no where are you? That far? (150kms away from where you are)"

'Who was that?'

"My 'X'. They have broken down and are at 'X'. I have to go, I will be back'.

Head to closest Pub, watch game, return earlier if one sided or stay to end if close.

 

[walshy93]

Depends how long you knew about the engagement party. If you can somehow work out, or swindle the facts so that said GF BBQ was organised first and whatnot, then you have the legit excuse that you can traverse through the party, leave a trail of destruction, and then GTFO. No guilt.

 

[lemon chicken]

I'd say once the speeches are done everyone just leaves anyway, so get there late rather than 7.

 

[Northworth]

if you are going stay for speeches
but i wouldn't go

 

[The Sultan]

ring him tomorrow
"I was going to come buy got too drink at GF BBQ, how about we cat h up for a beer next week end"

Who the farg has an sort of party on GF day some people have nfi.

 

[FootyJunkie]

why do girls do this ?!?!? Grand Final Day is sacred.... leave it alone

... ALL OF YOU! (girls)

 

[A Swallow]

I'm not staying for speeches. That could be later on. F*ck that. BBQ is already awesome.

 

[neroblack]

I'm not staying for speeches. That could be later on. F*ck that. BBQ is already awesome.

I'll bet you don't go

 

[Northworth]

report back please

 

[A Swallow]

Hamish & Andy approach. Was there for about half an hour. No decent girls to tune aside from groom's mother. Got in about three photos in a photo booth with different groups, put a present on the gifts table, signed the memoirs book and then made up some vague excuse to leave. Got back in the taxi and went to two different GF after parties, was loose. Still going now with about 10 boys. Up the Storm!

 

[Roobs321]

God, the answer is obvious! Just dont drink at the BBQ before the engagement!

Simple!

There is never a perfect time for anything, let alone an engagement party or wedding. If the people you invite have more important things to do (like get drunk at a GF BBQ they can attend any year), then they arent worth it.

 

[grimface_87]

God, the answer is obvious! Just dont drink at the BBQ before the engagement!

Simple!

There is never a perfect time for anything, let alone an engagement party or wedding. If the people you invite have more important things to do (like get drunk at a GF BBQ they can attend any year), then they arent worth it.

Not on Grand Final day is about as close to perfect as you can get

 

[I bleed Blue]

God, the answer is obvious! Just dont drink at the BBQ before the engagement!

Simple!

There is never a perfect time for anything, let alone an engagement party or wedding. If the people you invite have more important things to do (like get drunk at a GF BBQ they can attend any year), then they arent worth it.

You do realise you're posting on a football forum?

AFL grandfinal day is the biggest day of the year for alot of us here. None of my friends would even consider throwing a engagment party/wedding etc grandfinal day.

Any other weekedn of the year if fine, but if you throw it Grandfinal day you have to expect there are going to be some people that won't attend.

 

[neroblack]

God, the answer is obvious! Just dont drink at the BBQ before the engagement!

Simple!

There is never a perfect time for anything, let alone an engagement party or wedding. If the people you invite have more important things to do (like get drunk at a GF BBQ they can attend any year), then they arent worth it.

You lost me at "just don't drink at the BBQ".

 

[Roobs321]

But the game and post-match finishes by 6pm, the engagement thing starts at 7pm, only takes him 35 mins to get there.

Why cant he do both? No excuse really. Any poster on this forum as you said should arguably be immersed enough in the game to not be too worried about drinking.

 

[Bigeasy]

Any other weekedn of the year if fine, but if you throw it Grandfinal day you have to expect there are going to be some people that won't attend.

And therein lies the reason why you do hold engagements and weddings on GF day.

 

[bunsen burner]

"I'm not coming"

The end.

 

[bunsen burner]

God, the answer is obvious! Just dont drink at the BBQ before the engagement!

Simple!

There is never a perfect time for anything, let alone an engagement party or wedding. If the people you invite have more important things to do (like get drunk at a GF BBQ they can attend any year), then they arent worth it.

Not sure why you post on BF if you don't understand simple man etiquette: Don't get married or have engagements on grand final day.

There is a very good reasons why when engaged couples shop around for a venue the phone call goes like this:

No, sorry, we're booked out on that date
What about such and such a date?
No, sorry, booked out too
What about any weekend in October or November?
Sorry, booked. But Saturday the 29th of September is free
Great, I'll check if that works and come back

Honey, we can book this wonderful venue on the 29th of September
Is that a Saturday?
Yep
We can't do it
Why not?
Because the GF is on
But doesn't our wedding take precedence of a football match
<dons diplomatic hat> Of course sweetie, I'd choose to get married every single time. But unfortunately my mates won't come, will disown me, and will refer to me as "the vagina" for the rest of my life. Oh, and my Dad and brothers too. They won't come either.
Oh.

There is never ever any excuse for any wedding or engagement party or anything of the like on GF day.