- Joined
- May 23, 2012
- Posts
- 16,081
- Reaction score
- 14,910
- Location
- Smoothie King Central
- AFL Club
- Collingwood
- Other Teams
- Tottenham Hotspur, New Orleans Pels
Nah the Lakers are definitely Carlton.
The flashy recruits, the brazen spending, the smug pomp, the suspicious victories..
Orlando would play Melbourne circa 1965, forever losing their proverbial Ron Barassi.
Keep that Oladipo kid under lock and key
So my fellow Wonders.
Me and Wise Guy Sam were thinking of how toget out ofdo the BnF count this year.
I can't imagine how incredibly awesome a Son of Skeletor preview would be
Of course my preview would be awesome. Woe betide the pleb who would dare suggest otherwise..
Now, what is it that I'd be previewing? That new Superman movie? Yet another soporific, vomit-inducing paean to goodness, courage and basic humanity from the painting-by-numbers, fiscally-driven blockheads infesting the plastic fantastic nightmare that is Hollywood. Yet again the misunderstood villain is cruelly demonised, the victim of a clumsy two-dimensional caricature, forever hapless at the hands of our oh-so-dashing, follically-blessed, dentally perfect hero.
Do the dreary, inebriated hacks that drudge up their dross in the halls of La-La-Land ever stop to think how complicated the life of the archetypal super-villain can really be? Have they ever been on the verge of conceiving the most fiendish, cunning and diabolical plot ever known to mankind, only to have the police call out of the blue and tell you that two of your henchmen have been caught throwing the pickles from their burgers at senior citizens and school children, and that could I please make my way to Noble Park McDonalds immediately? Do they know what it feels like to bail your feeble-minded buffoons out of jail using your last $300, only to return home to your dilapidated lair and find that that idiot Beast Man couldn't handle his late-night kebab and has subsequently clogged up the plumbing, leaving Snake Mountain in a state of stinky disrepute? Do they know what if feels like to spend the night destitute, crashing on Hordak's couch, only to receive a text in the middle of the night from Evil-Lyn telling you that she's met someone else, while drowning you in unsolicited advice including remarking that your bone structure is not looking as strong and youthful as it once was, and that perhaps you should try drinking more milk, and that by the way, didn't I think that it was about time to update my wardrobe, and that the short-pants and knee-high boot look was so 1970s glam-rock passe, and that you snore too much in bed, never cook except for that one failed attempt which was unpleasant for all concerned and shall nevermore be spoken of, spend all my time talking about He-man and ruling all Eternia with an iron fist, trampling puny dissenters beneath my boot (which by the way are vintage, and will never go out of style),
Sorry, I lost my train of thought- so, you want me to preview the new Hannah Montana movie, is that it? FYI, I'll need 48 hours notice. And directions to the cinema. And a bus pass. Does popcorn come with the gig? This better be tax deductible.
