Worst lyrics thread

[Contra Mundum]

A number of candidates but I reckon 10ccs "Life is a minestrone"

"...Life is a cold lasagna suspended in deep freeze"

 

[M29]

That's pretty bad they managed to do it in one line. Here's one that ****s me:

"I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast"

Des'ree - Life

 

[mandy]

Surely Don Henley has to be a contender.....

"They're pickin' up the prisoners
And puttin em in a pen
And all she wants to do is dance, dance
Rebels been rebels
Since I don't know when
And all she wants to do is dance
Molotov cocktail the local drink
And all she wants to do is dance, dance
They mix 'em up right
In the kitchen sink
And all she wants to do is dance
Crazy people walkin round with blood in their eyes
And all she wants to do is dance, dance, dance"

 

[P_D]

"If I wanna floss I got my own" - J.Lo

 

[andrew coombs]

Let me tell ya bout my frienda
He got hit by fender
But he'll soon be on the menda
He's of the male gender

Indisposed...Australian Crawl

 

[andrew coombs]

and more

Its no use
He sees her
He starts to shake and cough
Just like the old man in
That book by Nabakov

Dont stand so close to me...The Police
I think he means "Lolita".

 

[hans moleman]

not sure if this is exact, but:

"nobody knows what it's like
to be a bad man
to be a sad man"

i heard it on a commercial for Limp Bizkit's latest album...then i burst out in laughter.

 

[mansize rooster]

dont make fun of that song...it was good when the who done it.

 

[Portia]

Boomin' Granny (Beastie Boys)

Yea..
Ah yea...
Aaah yea this one's dedicated to all
the ladies in the front , the back
All the older ladies out there
lookin' nice, you know who you are
whoo...

I need you, boomin' granny
I said I want you, boomin' granny
Boomin' granny, boomin' granny
Boomin' granny, good and plenty

Well it might sound odd, it might sound corny
But here's some sex rhymes for those that are horny
For your boomin' granny with the boomin' system
Said I love ya won't leave ya so you got to listen
See I'm talkin' about the way that I'm feeling
You're so lovely lengthy and so appealing
A sassy sophisticated sexy lady
Well I'm 26 and you're 80
The clock is ticking so you better not front
We can go downtown and we could smoke some blunt
Well you're a Golden Girl, just like Bea Arthur
Just turn down the lights so we can go farther

Boomin' granny, boomin' granny
Boomin' granny, good and plenty

Because I saw ya at the check out line
You dropped your coupons and you were looking fine
Sophisticated, and so mature
I couldn't really care if you're 50 or 74
Because I want ya, and I need ya
Hey boomin' granny you could be my teacher
And I could be your pet, bet
Listen old lady I'm gonna make ya sweat!
I know I'm younger, and your much older
You look so nice on my Chevy Nova
I'm gonna take her to the low rider show, and flaunt ya
I gotta tell ya lady I said I want ya, boomin' granny

Because I need you boomin' granny
Boomin' granny, boomin' fanny
Boomin' granny, good and plenty

 

[hans moleman]

Originally posted by mansize rooster
dont make fun of that song...it was good when the who done it.

sorry, i didn't realise it was originally done by the who (and i don't doubt it was done well).

however, when sung be an 'emotional' fred durst, it is laughable.

 

[bunsen burner]

First verse of Freak by Silverchair:


No more maybes
Your baby's got rabies
Sitting on a ball
In the middle of the Andes


And here's some sort of politcal statement by The Dead Kennedys:

Some clown in Sacramento was dragged into court
He shot his lawnmower
It disobeyed, it wouldn't start
Might makes right, it's the American wayR
They fined him $60 and sent him on his way

You know, some people don't take no ****
Maybe if they did they'd have half a brain left

 

[jerry springer]

Run To The Water by Live

first verse

oh desert speak to my heart
oh woman of the earth
maker of children who weep for love
maker of this birth
'til your deepest secrets are known to me
I will not be moved
I will not be moved

i have no idea what they are singing about

 

[brentoncowell]

mandy5, what are you talking about, Henley's lyrics there are fine, IMO. To find the worst lyrics ever you need not look further than any of the trash the crappy band Slipknot writes. They are talentless bums and are filth. They should be banned from making music.

 

[Watto]

"He's Just a boy, and I'm just a girl, can I make it anymore obvious?" - Avril Lavigne.

 

[Atticus]

"Guilty feet ain't got no rhythm"

Careless Whisper - G. Michael

 

[BomberGal]

Originally posted by jerry springer
Run To The Water by Live

first verse

oh desert speak to my heart
oh woman of the earth
maker of children who weep for love
maker of this birth
'til your deepest secrets are known to me
I will not be moved
I will not be moved

i have no idea what they are singing about

Err, actually I thought interpreting that was pretty easy, on its own, or especially in context with the rest of the song. Some sort of life or earth force, and trying to understand it...?

 

[Braddock]

Another Live candidate, "Rattlesnake".

let's go hang out in a mall, or a morgue,
a smorgasbord
let's go hang out in a church
we'll go find lurch
then we'll haul ass down through the abbey

Please Live fans, don't try and tell me this is some sort of symbolism or something. They're still **** lyrics.

 

[Contra Mundum]

From the "so bad its good" file - Killed by Death by motorhead

IF you squeeze my lizard I'll put my snake on you;
I'm a romantic adventure and a reptile too.
It don't make no differerence - but I aint gonna be..easy..easy.. the only time I'd be easy is when I'm.....killed by death

Lemmy we need you son!!!

 

[beckybiglands]

I think Sharkira summed it all up with,
"Lucky that my breasts are small and humble, so you don't confuse them with mountains"

If singing that doesn't make you figure you should be writing your own stuff, I don't know how they will ever learn

 

[jerry springer]

Originally posted by BomberGal
Err, actually I thought interpreting that was pretty easy, on its own, or especially in context with the rest of the song. Some sort of life or earth force, and trying to understand it...?

i think you are just as confused as me

 

[Disgustipated]

I could go on all day...

"girls dont like boys, girls like cars and money,
something something something something funny"


Nickelbacks latest.

Anything from Motley Crue.

Add some Kylie Minogue.

 

[Nic]

Originally posted by Disgustipated
I could go on all day...

"girls dont like boys, girls like cars and money,
something something something something funny"

Boys will laugh at girls when they're not funny.

We're all superficial bitches!!

 

[sawf]

Anything from Motley Crue.


cmon they have got the best lyrics

From Kickstart my heart:

"I get high, get high on speed
Top fuel funny cars a drug for me"

"always got the cops comin after me
custom built bike doin one-o-three"

From Wild side

"East LA at midnight
Papa wont be home tonite
found dead with his best friends wife"

"A baby cries
A cop dies
A day is paid on the wild side"

 

[Carlos]

I'm a Van Halen fan, but on "Why Can't This Be Love" Sammy Hagar penned what i thought at the time were the worst lyrics i'd ever heard from a band who i consider credible:

"Only time will tell if we stand the test of time.."

Christ almighty!

And yes, i'm also a MASSIVE Motley Crue fan, but Nikki Sixx did write some absolute shockers, particularly on their self titled album.

That Nickelback song thats getting flogged of late has the vilest lyrics i can recall that weren't meant to be funny. You've all heard it. "I like your pants around your feet". Bloody hell!

And that soppy 3 Doors Down tune that is also on high commercial radio rotation opens with the remarkably deep and thoughful lyrics:

"A hundred days have made me older, since last time that i saw your pretty face..."

Who the fricken hell buys this shlock?!?!

 

[Contra Mundum]

"Motorhead I love you baby - Motorhead alright!" Lemmy again!


There was that crap haircut band from the eighties "Time Bandits" from some Scandanavian country.

"The never ending road that leads to your door" - if it is never ending how can it terminate at your bloody door!!!! That lyric has infuriated me for 20 years