- Apr 18, 2014
- 5,860
- 8,748
- AFL Club
- North Melbourne
- Banned
- #226
Used to work with a bloke who would occasionally s**t his pants during the day and just keep working.
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1. Oldish lady who routinely has a s**t in the morning and then weighs herself on the scales outside of my office door.
I have always wanted to do this. Why have I not done it already?
I lost 1kg doing a before/after weight check once.
Not sure if that's strange or just two unfortunate lasses who have had a really rough life.
Yeah true. I guess it's better than saying your grandmother (who exists) died... That karma bus will come crashing soon enough.I mean I've made up bullshit stories about having the very odd day off work, but I've never invented a relative who didn't exist, and string people along for weeks.
every damn week someone gets offended when i dont want any of the birthday cake (i cant eat gluten). i have only been here for 5 years & there is probably only 20 or so people in my office. surely they get it now?
plus they still expect me to bring in cakes for everyone on my birthday. pricks.
Oh man, im crying. Lol'd hardI have some strange characters that I work with, I'll tell you that for free.
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the ******* stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big ******* dog to work. Every ******* day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ******* day.
Anyway, I drive these dipshits around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.
Used to work with a bloke who would occasionally s**t his pants during the day and just keep working.
I have some strange characters that I work with, I'll tell you that for free.
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the ******* stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big ******* dog to work. Every ******* day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ******* day.
Anyway, I drive these dipshits around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.
I've got two at my work (probably more if I can think of them)
1. Oldish lady who routinely has a s**t in the morning and then weighs herself on the scales outside of my office door.
2. Another woman who laughs like an erratic duck.
I have some strange characters that I work with, I'll tell you that for free.
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the ******* stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big ******* dog to work. Every ******* day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ******* day.
Anyway, I drive these dipshits around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.
Used to work with a bloke who would occasionally s**t his pants during the day and just keep working.
Used to work with a bloke who would occasionally s**t his pants during the day and just keep working.
I have some strange characters that I work with, I'll tell you that for free.
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the ******* stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big ******* dog to work. Every ******* day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ******* day.
Anyway, I drive these dipshits around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.
It's a meme, at least the idea. I saw someone do one as Misbah Ul Haq, quality.Man if you made that up kudos. Funniest thing I've seen on bigfooty.
It's a meme, at least the idea. I saw someone do one as Misbah Ul Haq, quality.
blue tops. that is all
mutton dressed up like lamb isn't good, but size 18 mutton doing it should be sent to the slaughterhouse.
Worked with plenty of drunks, but there is something seriously wrong about sitting in the boardroom of the office drinking whiskey watching test cricket during work hours with your boss. This was a regular occurrence during Ashes tours and close test matches, we'd then go back to look through emails and do some work at various times during the afternoon and during session breaks. The company supposedly had a no-drinking policy during work hours.