Prediction Outlandish Predictions for 2022

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Footy's back, and with the sample size of one round lets project the s**t out of what's going to happen for the rest of the year! Some things seem assured (Hawthorn, North, St Kilda being bad) other things less so (will the Blues and Cats carry on with their impressive round 1 form?). Sound off with your zany calls!

Also, feel free to add any additional categories that are of interest. e.g. ow many times will TK pull out the lab this season, and for whom? How many Bevo press-conference melts? How many times will Freed From Desire be mentioned in the leadup to our next game with the Dogs? Pandora's box has been opened...

Premier: Us.
Runner-up: Brisbane
Norm: Oliver.
New top-4 team: Carlton. This is the thread for silly calls, but I'm convinced off Thursday's game. Their midfield is much stronger and they're still handy in attack. Over-reliance on OMc down back could be their downfall, but we made a prelim with he and Frosty, so with a gun FB in Weitering to steer him they should be right.
New bottom-4 team: St Kilda. I like the Saints, and Ratten, but the list is a mess and not helped by their few skilled players being constantly hurt. Won't get the spoon, but will struggle all year.
Brownlow: Cripps. Theoretically Kennedy or Cerra might steal votes from him, but they aren't big enough names for that.
Coleman: McKay.
Rising Star: Rachele (Adelaide).
Spoon: North Melbourne.
Post-June wins for Gold Coast: 4/7. They have a relatively soft run home, and I reckon could upset one of Richmond/Essendon (mostly because I'd like to see Rich/Ess lose those games, rather than actual confidence).
Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023:
Breakout Dee:
I hate to say it, but Joel Smith. IMO Sparrow is already pretty much a lock in the side, and, ironically, with our injury-hit backline JSmith gets his chance to show off.
New Kingsley inductee: Elliott Himmelberg (Adelaide). From what I saw on the weekend this bloke looked hopeless; a stray beanstalk in Adelaide's forwardline. Ink him in for 4 snags and a new AO contested mark record when we play them.
 
Whoo hooo!
Been waiting for this thread!
Really looking forward to showing off my supreme football knowledge, again :D :D :D

Premier: DEES!
Runner-up: GWS.
Norm: Petracca. Will get the Brownlow as well.
New top-4 team: GWS
Think this will be the year they get their best team on the park when it matters. Toby Greene and Jesse Hogan fit and firing in finals, LOOK OUT!
Only round 1 but "Cogs" looks like he's not a plodder anymore, maybe he's renounced that Jesus stuff that was holding him back?

New bottom-4 team: St Kilda.
I mean it's obvious, they're garbage.

Brownlow: Petracca!
Coleman: Big Benny Brown
Rising Star: Wouldn't have a clue so I'll go with this Rachele guy.
Spoon: North, probably. Richmond a smokey.
Post-June wins for Gold Coast: 2 games. I think they'll pip Richmond.

Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023:
Richmond winning lol :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:

Breakout Dee: Wouldn't have a clue! Maybe Joel Smith based on the fact his name "rings a bell"?

New Kingsley inductee: Oscar MacDonald!
 

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Ok someone needs to be balance out this thread so that bad things don't happen:

Premier: Brisbane finally get it together in September.
Runner-up: Sydney
Norm: Dayne Zorko
New top-4 team: Sydney.
New bottom-4 team: Melbourne. We start the season on a 7 match winning streak then Goodwin catches a bad case of COVID and we bring in Mark Neeld to cover him and lose the last 15.
Brownlow: Marcus Bontempelli.
Coleman: Joe Daniher.
Rising Star: Jason Horne-Francis.
Spoon: North Melbourne.
Post-June wins for Gold Coast: 7 wins 4 losses. North x 2, Hawthorn, West Coast, Richmond, Collingwood, Adelaide - it's a pretty soft run home. They finish 9th with 11 wins and 11 losses.
Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023: Player refuses to shake hands with the umpires after the match, AFL makes it mandatory.
Breakout Dee: Injuries mean Fraser Rosman gets a decent run at it.
New Kingsley inductee: Pencil some nobody like Xavier O'Neill to get 25 disposals and kick 3 against us in round 9.
 
Premier: Us
Runner-up: North
Norm: Trac
New top-4 team:
Carlton and Norf
New bottom-4 team: Brisbane
Brownlow: Kozzie
Coleman: Kozzie
Rising Star: Kozzie
Spoon: Brisbane
Post-June wins for Gold Coast:
1/1
Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023: Toby Greene Style kicking
Breakout Dee:
I think Kozzie
New Kingsley inductee: Gonna have to go with Kozzie
 
Premier: Melbourne
Runner-up: Sydney
Norm: Clarry
New top-4 team: Sydney
New bottom-4 team: WCE
Brownlow: Neale
Coleman: Big Brenny Brown
Rising Star: Jake Bowey
Spoon: North Melbourne.
Post-June wins for Gold Coast: 5
Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023: Vetted questions for post-match press conference.
Breakout Dee: Judd McVee
New Kingsley inductee: Patrick Naish
 

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Premier: Melbourne
Runner-up: Brisbane
Norm: Petracca
New top-4 team: Fremantle (midfield coming along nicely and they've recruited well in other parts of the ground that they are lacking, if they get their best players back from injury... watch out!)
New bottom-4 team: West Coast (cooked with injury and their best players are getting on, rebuild coming soon)
Brownlow: Petracca (if he keeps getting BOG, then why the hell not!)
Coleman: Daniher or McKay
Rising Star: N. Daicos
Spoon: Gold Coast (I'm not buying into the early hype, they'll poo the bed soon and revert back to their old ways)
Post-June wins for Gold Coast: 2 (revoke the license and hurry up and give it to Tassie)
Issue that comes up in a handful of games but nonetheless prompts rule-changes for 2023: The Authoratarian Football League bans fans from sledging the umpires (honestly seems like it's heading that way at this rate)
Breakout Dee: Taj Woewodin (Many would say Howes or Laurie if any out of those who've yet to debut, but I'm hearing many reports that Taj is killing it already. If we cop a few injuries at some point, I hope he's in the frame if he tears it up at VFL level)
New Kingsley inductee: Levi Casboult to somehow kick a bag on one of our defenders this week
 
The Match Review Panel will act with integrity, impartiality and apply suspensions without fear or favour all year.
No just kidding !!!
No field umpires will make any mistakes in any games
 

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