Official Match Thread Season 36 Round 12 - Roys FFC v East Side Phoenix @ Brunswick Junction Oval [MOTR]

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Mar 12, 2021
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Last time they met: Yet to play each other in Season 36
(Previous Seasons have no bearing on our lord and saviour, THE SIM)

As we enter Season 36 Round 12 - today we mark the week with a special day. There were many entries vying to desperately be a part of Qooty folklore, to be forever remembered in checks notes Round 12 of the 36th Season of the Sweet Football Association on bigfooty.com, the anonymous text based online fantasy forum.
An Honourable mention to the below applicants:
  • Mother’s Day in Malawi
  • National Aesthetician Day
  • International Day of Rural Women
  • National Grouch Day
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NATIONAL CHEESE CURD DAY!

So what type of cheese are you? I've given you a decadent selection for you to choose for yourself. Note, you may or may not fit in with the cheese that's appropriate. Captains, you can thank me for assisting your recruitment later.

Bocconcini (Furies)


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Small sized, shiny surface, semi soft with an elastic texture, (like a Gumby, but slightly better)
A mild milky and sweet taste and usually best reserved for crumbling in finals Qooty.

Burrata (Wonders)

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Mozzarella skin filled with shredded curds, a creamy, oozy centre that is often likely to be a melt captain centre
Almost like this type of cheese is good enough to make a grand final of cheese’s and then lose at the last hurdle ;)

Double Cream Brie (Swamprats)

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Creamy, luscious and contains a high fat content, along with a mild, buttery flavour that intensifies as it age
Both flavoursome in small doses, and often the reason for that weird sinking feeling in your stomach

Saganaki (Phoenix)

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Arrives to you sizzling, prior to being lit on fire in front of you
Equally versatile as it is delicious, as it can come in many forms such as Kefalotyri or Graviera
Possibly the best cheese on the list

Haloumi (Dragons)

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Creation requires a multi-step process, often including gate crashing
Tasty to some, easily overcooked creating a rubbery, fibrous texture that leaves the palette wanting.
The saltiest of all teams cheeses, and often a short timespan before its usefulness runs out.

Mozzarella (Warriors)

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Mild, smooth brained cheese, with several imitations of low quality produced globally.
Usually for those who can’t afford the good stuff, while losing its moisture and becoming dry and tough to banter with stomach after a short period

Blue Cheese (Demons)

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Mouldy spots wherever you look, with a pungent, salty flavour
Contains a crusty rind that gives it a rustic nature, giving it relevance only of a bygone era
Requires stainless steel needles to pierce and aerate the cheese to assist with the growth of the insular blue cultures within to achieve maximum maturity

Provolone (Bombers)

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An acquired taste, this cheese is noted to always be semi-hard, with a smoky flavour not for the feint of heart.
This cheese takes two to three months to get permabanned from your plate mature into a creamy and extra milky flavour

Feta (OOB)

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Extremely salty, uncooked cheese that best goes with a Guinness salad
Another versatile cheese, however prone to crumbling when it counts
Arguably the Saganaki from Wish

Colby (Roys)
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Nice regular cheese that grandma prefers, but is boring and has lost support from the new generation
Described as having an open texture with several irregular holes in their defense
More of a snack, side piece than the real deal

Cream Cheese (Bears)

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Neutral tasting cheese that you won’t complain about, as what you see is what you get that also has slightly acidic undertones
Versatile and often used either to cook opponents, as a flirtatious sweet treat or as a base for your next dessert.


Surely, with all those options, you can find a new team one to suit!

Phoenix by 12 points


Captains, be sure to submit your team sheets by 11:50 Thursday, AWST, otherwise if you don't, Tigerturbulance has to do a 17 game ban and Jabba73 automatically becomes admin​
 

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I always like to be first on and one nice team last season rejigged the thread so I was, but I'm the first Roy, so hi Phoenix(s?).

Didn't do ancient Greek so I have no idea what the plural should be.

Period Comma GIF by Use Commas
We accept either Phoenixes or Phoenecies.
 
Didn't do ancient Greek
Good grief, this is outrageous. What has happened to the Australian education system? When I was a lad we were forced to study 8 different ancient languages before we even finished primary school
 

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Good grief, this is outrageous. What has happened to the Australian education system? When I was a lad we were forced to study 8 different ancient languages before we even finished primary school

Those were swearing in 8 different languages ??? I mean, that’s all the foreign languages I know !!!
 
Ok - big challenge for the Phoenix !!

The last four weeks we have had the Bombers, Furies, Dragons and the bye. Can you be the best posting team in this 5 week stretch ???

Can you beat the Bye ????
 
Nah he’d definitely be ducking out the train to get the potato cakes and s**t from the platform.

Is he getting s**t from the platform or doing a s**t from the platform ?? Asking for a few million Sydney commuters !!
 
thewizardmelon nearly missed Monday game thread 🫣

Never ever post a match thread on a Tuesday, it’s the golden rule!

Ok - big challenge for the Phoenix !!

The last four weeks we have had the Bombers, Furies, Dragons and the bye. Can you be the best posting team in this 5 week stretch ???

Can you beat the Bye ????

Wow we feel for you, we’ve had great banter with a group called checks notes again ‘The S36 Premiers; East Side Phoenix’ the last 4 weeks, they’re great fun.

But seriously, beating that rabble should be a piece of cake cheese
 
DemurePrincess just to bring you up to speed, the Roys are the nursing home of the SFA. They’ll argue differently but it’s where you go when your career is flailing and you want to see out your days in peace with TDC at the helm
 

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