Even further off topic. Your weirdest life experience ?

[Pessimistic]

Normally you have to give before getting, but I dont want to colour this with going first

Please keep it clean its not that board that got sent off whos name I cant remember now
Also be mindful of details which could have your identity hacked

 

[van peebles]

Prostate examination by the best looking bird that worked at the hospital.
Didnt know wehter to laugh,cry or crackafat.

 

[Starburns_]

Prostate examination by the best looking bird that worked at the hospital.
Didnt know wehter to laugh,cry or crackafat.

Similar to this, sperm bank.

It's awkard enough turning up and collecting a cup from the person behind the desk, but then you walk into a room that's sole purpose is for guys to wank in, you don't want to touch anything, certainly not the pr0n mags.

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

Defecated oneself at work. That awkward moment where an innocuous fart turns into disaster.

 

[JoseMourinho]

Guy came up while I was walking home thinking he was talking to a girl for 10 minutes and trying to get me to go out with him. Most awkwardest thing ever and I told him after 10 minutes that I am clearly a guy and just **** off....

Was so random

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

Guy came up while I was walking home thinking he was talking to a girl for 10 minutes and trying to get me to go out with him. Most awkwardest thing ever and I told him after 10 minutes that I am clearly a guy and just **** off....

Was so random

Don't tell us the aftermath please.

 

[Asgardian]

One day during my adventure as a cricket umpire, it was in a league where I was the paid umpire (by BOTH teams) and went from bowling end to bowling end. The batting team supplied the square leg umpire.

The batsman was nervous, hitting the ball straight to a squarish cover and took off, the batsman backing up was not very experienced so he too took off. They both got about half way when the fielder had returned the ball to the keeper and he promptly removed the bails. I was scampering into position to watch for a run out at the bowlers end, catching sight of both batsmen in the middle of the pitch as the keeper was running one of them out.

BUT WHICH ONE?

Both batsmen immediately started screaming at each other, saying the other was the one who was run out. The square leg umpire had no idea, he was barely awake.

The fielding team was celebrating and the batsmen started getting physical with each other, with the big bad umpire approaching them trying to regain control. Both batsmen then started on me saying the other bloke was the one who was run out. The fielding team didn't care less which one it was and the square leg umpire was starting to wake up getting interested in the possible fight in the middle of the pitch.

Both batsmen wanted to argue with me, but in my infinite wisdom I had the solution, I knew which one was out so I unceremoniously sent him on his way. (Lucky he didn't know I was not sure whether they crossed or not) (I actually reckon it was a dead heat, they were level when the bails came off, so the bloke facing was the one I gave out)

That was a nice day out in the middle officiating

 

[JoseMourinho]

Don't tell us the aftermath please.

Nothing happened. Walked off and that guy ****ing bolted.

 

[Shawt]

Got a few, all involve nudity, but not necessarily mine... much to Ms Shawt's shagrin

I was chased down a major road in Toronto by a topless woman in shorts that may as well have not been there

 

[DrEvil_]

Have you ever gone completely soft while inside? Happened to me once. Can't explain it. Pretty awkward and insulting for the lady too.

 

[ChappyUK]

Just had my second daughter and my brother who is in the States had his daughter on the same day with a birth time 1min apart.

 

[Lethality]

At the library being a nerd and a hot blonde from the gym next door started flirting with me. I let her down gently by pretending that I didn't notice and asking her if there was anything specific she wanted from me. She eventually gave up and just asked me for help with her library card.

 

[Norwegian Blue]

Similar to this, sperm bank.

It's awkard enough turning up and collecting a cup from the person behind the desk, but then you walk into a room that's sole purpose is for guys to wank in, you don't want to touch anything, certainly not the pr0n mags.

Similar. Nurse short and dumpy and old enough to be my mum hands me the clear plastic cup and directs me to the public toilet down the hall.

You had fap mags? Luxury! 150 of us used to have to fap in middle of et road.

 

[Wosh]

Have you ever gone completely soft while inside? Happened to me once. Can't explain it. Pretty awkward and insulting for the lady too.

I'm sure she was deflated.

 

[Starburns_]

Similar. Nurse short and dumpy and old enough to be my mum hands me the clear plastic cup and directs me to the public toilet down the hall.

You had fap mags? Luxury! 150 of us used to have to fap in middle of et road.

It was like a special room just for that, it had a couch too (not that I sat on it, like WTF), as well as a TV which I presume had pr0n on it. I didn't touch the mags for obvious reasons, I only touched the door handle and the sink, the whole room had a seedy vibe to it.

 

[DrEvil_]

It was like a special room just for that, it had a couch too (not that I sat on it, like WTF), as well as a TV which I presume had pr0n on it. I didn't touch the mags for obvious reasons, I only touched the door handle and the sink, the whole room had a seedy vibe to it.

It really shouldn't be this way. They should make sperm donation a privilege, like you've got to pass an IQ test to have your gene passed on. Else we'll just have a bunch of man molesters running around because they can't change tyres.

 

[DrEvil_]

I'm sure she was deflated.

I see what you did there...though she was quite pneumatic...

 

[Wosh]

I see what you did there...though she was quite pneumatic...

A situation like that could cause a real blow up. Hopefully she was a doll about it and understood.

 

[DrEvil_]

Just had my second daughter and my brother who is in the States had his daughter on the same day with a birth time 1min apart.

How does it work with the time zones and all that?

 

[Stan_Darsh72]

I once was completely shitfaced and managed to pick up lesbians.

To this day I have no idea how I managed to do that.

 

[KardiniaPark]

I'm sure she was deflated.

I can't tell if that's a brilliant blow up doll joke or you are trying to be supportive...

 

[KardiniaPark]

I once was completely shitfaced and managed to pick up lesbians.

To this day I have no idea how I managed to do that.

I would like to change my vote for poster of the year.

 

[DrEvil_]

I once was completely shitfaced and managed to pick up lesbians.

To this day I have no idea how I managed to do that.

Were they as good as we all imagined?

 

[Stan_Darsh72]

Were they as good as we all imagined?

Yes.

 

[KardiniaPark]

Ok what I don't get about lesbians is that they roger themselves stupid with these terrible strap ones, sure they make out and get boobs and stuff so that's great but surely a perfect lesbian experience would be one guy and two girls? You get a decent rogering plus you still get a box in your face while getting smashed by a dude, surely that's a win for everyone?