Social Science Braggers

[Bulldog Breed]

You guys think you've met braggers? The braggers I know are the worst type of braggers...

cwatididthar

 

[Drakescoffeecake]

Name droppers are worse. Theres a girl my wife went to school with who we may see once a year who is a serial name dropper. Her family is friends with Tyson Edwards so all you hear about is Tyse this, Tyse that. "Oh my god, you know how I know Tyson Edwards.....yep....well yesterday he popped round and I had a drink with him and we were talking about his issues with Andy and...oh you wouldnt believe who I spoke to on Saturday night....Matthew Pavlich was at the Exchance and we..."

Just. ****. Off.

Hahaha yep absolutely spot on!

Met this woman at a party and she was going on about how her son is the lead singer of Galleon (yeah I know, who?) and that she knows Hugh Sheridan really well and that she's met the whole cast of Packed to the Rafters and that Hugh and that carbo guy took her out for dinner in Sydney .. blah blah blah. The only reason no one says anything is because her son was killed in the bali bombings and she tears up every day.

 

[Drakescoffeecake]

Jay: So I had one bent over the table here, there was one up here who I was fingering and I was just toe ****ing the one on the floor.
Will: So when do we get to meet these lucky ladies?
Jay: You can't, they've gone back to the playboy mansion.

Great episode tonight One of the best

 

[Notorious_29]

Have no problem with someone who wants to brag, as long as they can back it up. Some of the greatest sportsman of all time talked themselves up time and time again because they knew they were the best.

 

[Illinois Nazi]

Hahaha yep absolutely spot on!

Met this woman at a party and she was going on about how her son is the lead singer of Galleon (yeah I know, who?) and that she knows Hugh Sheridan really well and that she's met the whole cast of Packed to the Rafters and that Hugh and that carbo guy took her out for dinner in Sydney .. blah blah blah. The only reason no one says anything is because her son was killed in the bali bombings and she tears up every day.

That would explain why the band's not going so well...

 

[Drakescoffeecake]

That would explain why the band's not going so well...

Bahaha! Her OTHER son. The one that was killed was Josh, Nick is the lead singer of Galleon if my memory serves me

 

[indieswan96]

Have a mate who claimed he hooked up with 6 girls in the one night, when we asked their names he proceeded to say:

Hannah
Anna
Brianna
Savannah
etc.

 

[Bert1]

Have a mate who claimed he hooked up with 6 girls in the one night, when we asked their names he proceeded to say:

Hannah
Anna
Brianna
Savannah
etc.

Lol. Nothing to brag about there.

Everybody has had a crack at Hannah, Anna, Brianna, Savannah etc

 

[bresker]

When does bragging stop and a full on Walter Mitty-like fantasy life start? It's hard to tell with some people.

A while ago I did some workplace training. This was what my 21 year old trainer claimed. He had a beard like an Amish:-


1.) His dad was a major in the British army. He trained Nato forces all over the world and thus ole dog's mess claims to have lived in just about every country on the planet.

He eats a croissant very day because he lived in the south of France when he was 11 and ate one every on the way to school every day. Fresh from the bakery.

'Where did you live in France?' asked one of my new colleagues.

He uhmmed and ahhhd and rapped his knuckles on the table pretending to remember.

'Somewhere in the south' he eventually offered. He can speak 'a bit of French' too. Surprisingly, he didn't show it off.

His dad's work also took him to the USA for a few months, so our boy was awarded an American passport. But the Americans took it off him when they discovered he had a British passport. This greatly annoys him.

Later, we were discussing the countries of the Commonwealth, as this is relevant to the job. He reeled off Canada, South Africa and New Zealand............and then mused that Burgundy in France was part of the Commonwealth too. 'That's where the Normans who invaded England came from,' he solemnly informed us.

Yeah, the Normans from Burgundy. The Normburgundians?

2.) He keeps going on about his various mystery illnesses, many of which involve his rectum. He couldn't follow his dad's army career because he strained a muscle in his back and had to retire to bed for several months.

Then he told us that the company frowned if you took more than 12 mins toilet break per day (FFS!) . He used to get told off for running to the toilet all time himself, but now he has special dispensation because he has Crohn's disease. It used to affect him very badly but if he cuts out wheat, sugar and acidic foods he can control it.

"Aye, that's why you're drinking a bottle of Coke!" interjected the young lady to my right.

And sure enough, while he'd been telling us this he's been swigging away from a 500ml bottle of Coca Cola.

He ignored her and informed us that if he keeps running out the door it's because of his Crohn's. Which isn't very bad. His friend's Crohn's is much worse.

He hasn't run out the door once. And he stuffs himself with croissants, fries and sugary drinks.

I used to work with a guy who had to take a daily cocktail of drugs and was frequently hospitalised by his awful Crohn's disease. Funny, that. Not reallly.

3.) He has a criminal record.

He broke into a house 14 years before he was born. How's that you ask? Well, someone with exactly the same name as him lived in his parents' home before they bought it.

This fella was 14 years older than our trainer. And because he had a record for breaking and entering it was transferred to our bloke and he just can't get rid of it. Doesn't matter how often he complains. He went to police headquarters and everything. But he just can't get rid of it. His reputation is forever sullied.

4.) His uncle was in the navy and he and his mates got two days leave on an island so they went mad and got blind drunk for two days and suddenly they realised they had to get back to the ship so they stole a Citreon 2CV but the clutch broke so they fixed it with a shoelace but that burnt so the uncle climbed on the bonnet and moved the clutch by hand while they drove at 60 mph, then they crashed the car and stole a boat and got back to the ship but - get this! - the leave was for 3 DAYS not 2 DAYS! They hadn't realised they had an extra day! And all the sirens were screaming on the island as the authorities looked for the phantom car and boat thieves. Ha!

Later, the uncle was shot by pirates in the Suez. Blew his shoulder off, they found it on board behind a pillar. Pity, the uncle spoke 4 languages, all self-taught, he could have been a navy translator.

 

[triplejdude]

Now THAT is an epic bullshitter.

 

[Ed_Gein]

Story toppers are the worst.

Yup, i used to call them "One up", no matter what you were telling them, they always seem to have to go one better.

IMO, Braggers are no different to compulsive liars. A majority of the stories they tell are full of shit.

 

[patsmith]

I love hearing a chronic bragger's version of a story, when they've clearly forgotten that you were there too.

 

[checkraiseulite]

Used to work with a guy who was an epic bragger. Absolutely hilarious and I'm actually glad I worked with him, made work more entertaining. He was an older guy about 60, I was 18-19 at the time and I think that he thought I'd look up to him and believe everything he said.

This guy reckoned had owned/managed/sold every business in my suburb.
He had also been in the navy and seen any country imaginable, and by sheer co-incidence had been in those countries when major events happened.

He'd also tell stories about how he'd go out with his mates to pubs etc and how 'young upstarts' would hassle him and how him and his sixty year old ex navy buddies would beat people up.

His favorite topic though was his son. The bullshit he used to sprout about his son was absolutely hilarious.

I used to keep track of the shit he said (he would forget) and trap him a couple of days later.

 

[And_ROOS]

Couldn't help but jump into this thread with 2 people i work with, 1 is the "one up" kinda guy, and the other is the batsh*t crazy lying kinda girl.

This bloke always has a "mate".
I remember so many barbecues, where for example i said i had just finished an upgrade on my car, he had a mate with a similar car but slightly better and it cost him less to do to his then what i paid.

Then once i mentioned scoring a goal at soccer which hit the crossbar and somehow snuck in, so he just happened to have a mate who scored off the crossbar then the uprights.

Every time someone has a story, he will have a mate who did it slightly better.

But my favourite is a woman from work. Always spouts BS, but one story in particular was a ripper. I had been asked by a co-worker about the Darwin awards books, and said i was a fan of the urban legends and told him about the tarantulas nesting in cactus story (people move to Mexico, take cactus from somewhere, put it in house and it explodes releasing tons of tarantulas).

Anyway, this woman then proceeds to correct me, telling me it happened to her friends in Melbourne in the 80s, and that it was covered up because customs and her friends would have been in deep trouble had it been released to the public.

 

[Dazb86]

Hahaha yep absolutely spot on!

Met this woman at a party and she was going on about how her son is the lead singer of Galleon (yeah I know, who?) and that she knows Hugh Sheridan really well and that she's met the whole cast of Packed to the Rafters and that Hugh and that carbo guy took her out for dinner in Sydney .. blah blah blah. The only reason no one says anything is because her son was killed in the bali bombings and she tears up every day.

Is it bad that I laughed when I read that?

 

[ThePuppetMaster]

I have a mate who brags about his sex life all the ****ing time, always to me more than anyone else... I don't really know why either, I have a girlfriend and get teh sechs way more often than he does.

One of the most bazaar things he has bragged about was when we were in year 11 - we were at a party and he hooked up with this chick and I hooked up with her friend.

for about 2 weeks he was giving me shit because I hooked up with the uglier friend out of the two. Which is true, but I had macked the hotter friend a few months earlier anyway

Not to mention the fact that I did it to wingman my mate anyway.

Needless to say he was never wingmanned again.

you are such a sneaky bragger, throwing in little bragging moments while dissing some other bragger

tisk

 

[Whacker]

Rohan Coventry-Tateson owns this thread hands down

 

[glenn_ox]

You've all obviously never stood on the summit of Mt Everest.

Laughed out loud at this, got some weird looks.

 

[yeah_nah]

you are such a sneaky bragger, throwing in little bragging moments while dissing some other bragger

tisk

No bragging, hotter friend was average at best and ugly friend was disgusting

 

[krusden]

I love hearing a chronic bragger's version of a story, when they've clearly forgotten that you were there too.

or the ones telling stories where YOU were there and THEY weren't.

know a bloke who does this alllllllllllllll the time.

 

[ThePuppetMaster]

No bragging, hotter friend was average at best and ugly friend was disgusting

haha, play through

 

[woopedazz]

You bastard. I came to post something something like that. Just because I had it ready: "I make it a habit to never brag. I think that that, my ability to run 100m in under 10 seconds, my 180 IQ, my 13 inch penis and my billion dollar bank account are some of my best qualities, or at least that's what Ricky Ponting and Jessica Alba tell me."

[YOUTUBE]pIoZ1bsILF8[/YOUTUBE]

 

[Oct19]

Bahaha! Her OTHER son. The one that was killed was Josh, Nick is the lead singer of Galleon if my memory serves me

Seems so, Nick is listed here:

http://www.triplejunearthed.com/Galleon

And Josh is on this memorial:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/85/Balinese_ground_zero.JPG


Yeah, i have too much time on my hands.....

 

[Allbetsroff]

When does bragging stop and a full on Walter Mitty-like fantasy life start? It's hard to tell with some people.

A while ago I did some workplace training. This was what my 21 year old trainer claimed. He had a beard like an Amish:-


1.) His dad was a major in the British army. He trained Nato forces all over the world and thus ole dog's mess claims to have lived in just about every country on the planet.

He eats a croissant very day because he lived in the south of France when he was 11 and ate one every on the way to school every day. Fresh from the bakery.

'Where did you live in France?' asked one of my new colleagues.

He uhmmed and ahhhd and rapped his knuckles on the table pretending to remember.

'Somewhere in the south' he eventually offered. He can speak 'a bit of French' too. Surprisingly, he didn't show it off.

His dad's work also took him to the USA for a few months, so our boy was awarded an American passport. But the Americans took it off him when they discovered he had a British passport. This greatly annoys him.

Later, we were discussing the countries of the Commonwealth, as this is relevant to the job. He reeled off Canada, South Africa and New Zealand............and then mused that Burgundy in France was part of the Commonwealth too. 'That's where the Normans who invaded England came from,' he solemnly informed us.

Yeah, the Normans from Burgundy. The Normburgundians?

2.) He keeps going on about his various mystery illnesses, many of which involve his rectum. He couldn't follow his dad's army career because he strained a muscle in his back and had to retire to bed for several months.

Then he told us that the company frowned if you took more than 12 mins toilet break per day (FFS!) . He used to get told off for running to the toilet all time himself, but now he has special dispensation because he has Crohn's disease. It used to affect him very badly but if he cuts out wheat, sugar and acidic foods he can control it.

"Aye, that's why you're drinking a bottle of Coke!" interjected the young lady to my right.

And sure enough, while he'd been telling us this he's been swigging away from a 500ml bottle of Coca Cola.

He ignored her and informed us that if he keeps running out the door it's because of his Crohn's. Which isn't very bad. His friend's Crohn's is much worse.

He hasn't run out the door once. And he stuffs himself with croissants, fries and sugary drinks.

I used to work with a guy who had to take a daily cocktail of drugs and was frequently hospitalised by his awful Crohn's disease. Funny, that. Not reallly.

3.) He has a criminal record.

He broke into a house 14 years before he was born. How's that you ask? Well, someone with exactly the same name as him lived in his parents' home before they bought it.

This fella was 14 years older than our trainer. And because he had a record for breaking and entering it was transferred to our bloke and he just can't get rid of it. Doesn't matter how often he complains. He went to police headquarters and everything. But he just can't get rid of it. His reputation is forever sullied.

4.) His uncle was in the navy and he and his mates got two days leave on an island so they went mad and got blind drunk for two days and suddenly they realised they had to get back to the ship so they stole a Citreon 2CV but the clutch broke so they fixed it with a shoelace but that burnt so the uncle climbed on the bonnet and moved the clutch by hand while they drove at 60 mph, then they crashed the car and stole a boat and got back to the ship but - get this! - the leave was for 3 DAYS not 2 DAYS! They hadn't realised they had an extra day! And all the sirens were screaming on the island as the authorities looked for the phantom car and boat thieves. Ha!

Later, the uncle was shot by pirates in the Suez. Blew his shoulder off, they found it on board behind a pillar. Pity, the uncle spoke 4 languages, all self-taught, he could have been a navy translator.

AH HAH!

THIS IS BS, COCA COLA DON'T COME IN 500ML bottles


Your web of lies has been unravelled, by me, the greatest unraveller of webs of the lying variety there is.

 

[premiers06]

AH HAH!

THIS IS BS, COCA COLA DON'T COME IN 500ML bottles


Your web of lies has been unravelled, by me, the greatest unraveller of webs of the lying variety there is.

Yeah but the coke was imported from overseas where they are made in 500ml bottles. It's true....