Cremation Anyone?

[Mooster7]

You guys always seem tickled to read proof positive that Americans are freaks. So, I thought I'd share this with you in the event it hasn't made international news.

Apparently in Georgia (South East Confederate State just North of the voting-challenged Floridians) there was a crematory operated by one Ray Marsh. As it turns out, a couple of years ago Marsh's crematory broke, and he couldn't incinerate bodies.

What did he do? He started burying corpses on his property, and stuffing multiple bodies in unauthorized vaults. Investigators believe there may be as many as two hundred stiffs in various stages of rot & putrification on this property.

Worse, he had charged the families of the deceased on average $1200 to perform the cremation process. He may have collected as much as a quarter of a MILLION dollars for unperformed services. The price it would have cost simply to have fixed the damned thing to begin with? $795 and perhaps a pot of coffee for the servicemen.

Ashes to ashes,

Mooster

 

[Lethal]

wasnt the supposed ashes that he gave the families just concrete powder?
dont know if i would want to be cremated when i die......in fact when i die i want to be stuffed and placed on the couch as a reminder to my wife that our marriage will last

 

[Mooster7]

No, no, no Lethal! That bogus marriage contract ends at death! That's the best part of it. You are off the hook, my friend.

As for me, I would like to have one of my middle fingers preserved and delivered to my ex (I am already off the hook )

Another downside of cremation is zombie-ism. If there is one thing I have learned from many evenings watching quality film at the drive-in theatre is that - sooner or later - some sort of incident will occur bringing the lot of us out our graves to terrorize the countryside as flesh eating ghouls.

What sort of zombie can a cremated guy make? A cloud of dust? That's no more scary than a "Sydney Swan." No terror there. Piss weak to say the least. No, I want to chew the faces and eat the brains of my countrymen as a full-on zombie.

Peace, Mooster

 

[M29]

Saw this on the news the other day. Weird ****.

 

[The Hitman]

Damn. I wanna be cremated too...

The Hitman

 

[Lethal]

Originally posted by Mooster7
No, no, no Lethal! That bogus marriage contract ends at death! That's the best part of it. You are off the hook, my friend.

i meant so that my wife would worship me even after i was gone

 

[Lethal]

oh and so that if she did try to remarry,shed either have to get rid of the couch.......or the guy would be scared off by her late husband still sitting on the couch

 

[Asgardian]

Originally posted by Lethal
when i die i want to be stuffed and placed on the couch as a reminder to my wife that our marriage will last

mmmmmmm, this is strange Lethal, I'm married, and I'm stuffed, but last time I checked, I aint dead yet.. , what goes here mate?.

All my friends are getting married, ohhhhhhho, they're all growing old............ (join in if you know the song, lol)